“Why? What for?”
“Does Hideaway provide weddings?”
“I doubt it. There isn’t much demand for that kind of thing.”
“I’m only a cop, but isn’t the whole idea of business to advertise and create a demand? People used to spend a fortune on weddings.”
“Did they?” Diana began to get interested.
“Yeah. Getting married was every girl’s ambition, the biggest day of her life.”
“That’s pathetic,” said Kiru.
“How did they spend a fortune?” asked Diana.
“On the clothes,” said Norton. “On the wedding presents. On the reception, which was a meal and party after the ceremony. On the honeymoon, which was when the bride and groom went on a luxury holiday together after the wedding.” He gestured with his wine glass, encompassing the whole planet. “If couples came here to get married, they’d also have their honeymoons here.”
Diana nodded thoughtfully. “This could work. I’m going to suggest it to the board of directors.” She paused and studied Norton. “You’re not on a percentage, so why are you telling me this?”
“Because,” said Norton, “I want to be the first person to get married here.”
“The first?” said Diana. “As far as I understand it, marriage is not a solo event. So who’s going to be equal first?”
She was looking at him in an odd way. Surely she didn’t think Norton meant her! She who was sometimes a he…
Norton looked at Kiru. Diana looked at Kiru. Kiru looked at Norton.
“No,” she said.
“In fifty hours plus,” said Diana, “it’s the official opening. There won’t be any paying guests, not for a while. But the gaming halls will take their first bets. The first pleasure dome will begin to revolve. Everything will begin to happen. Maybe this restaurant will be serving edible food by then.”
Norton glanced at her meal, noticing that she’d hardly had anything. He’d eaten everything, as had Kiru.
“It’s going to be a spectacular occasion,” Diana continued. “I’ve been trying to think of something unique, something so very absolutely different, to generate extra publicity. Now I know what it is. We’re going to hold our first wedding. Your wedding, Wayne.”
“But not mine,” said Kiru.
“He’s getting married,” Diana told her. “If not to you, then someone else.”
“Who?” said Norton.
“I don’t know,” said Diana. “Anyone. Pedro, for example. As well as Rico and Gino, of course. But don’t get your hopes up. All three of them would have to accept you. Quartets are very rare. They never last. Maybe you could marry one of the natives. That would make a great story.”
“What?” said Norton.
“No,” said Kiru. “He’s mine.”
“Am I?” said Norton, and he stretched his hand across the table toward her.
Kiru shrugged. His hand touched hers. She didn’t move it away. His fingers squeezed hers. Her eyes wouldn’t meet his.
“Kiru,” said Norton, “you’ve made me the happiest man in the whole galaxy, and I promise I’m going to make you the happiest girl in the entire universe.”
“Okay, okay.”
“Enough of this,” said Diana. “What should happen during a wedding, a really expensive wedding?”
Norton told her. Diana listened intently to every word, nodding her head, while Kiru sank lower and lower into her chair, shaking her head.
“Now I’m in a real dilemma,” said Diana. She stood up and began to circle, or triangle, the table. “Will I go as your best man, Wayne? Or should I be your bridesmaid, Kiru?”
“Why not both?” said Kiru.
“That’s a possibility,” said Diana, “although the most important role seems to be the person in charge. She has the most dialogue, far more than the bride and groom.”
“She?” said Norton. “It’s usually ‘he.’ ”
“Not on Cafe World,” said Diana. “Kiru must promise to love, honour and obey, you said?”
“Yeah,” said Norton. He couldn’t remember very many of the lines. What was the groom meant to say?
“Honour and obey?” said Kiru. She hid her face in her hands. “Were women treated like slaves in your era?”
“No, well… er, yeah, I guess… slightly… er, in a way.”
Kiru opened her fingers to peer at Diana. “If you’re doing weddings here, will you also do divorces?”
“No,” said Norton. “It’s ‘until death do us part.’ ”
“Yes, master,” said Kiru, and she yawned. “Of course, master. To hear is to obey, master.”
“Divorce and marriage?” Diana nodded. “Can’t have one without the other.”
“Good,” said Kiru.
“You want to officiate at our wedding?” Norton said to Diana. “Will that be legal?”
“Definitely,” Diana replied. She sat down at the table, reached for the violin case, opened the lid and thumb-coded her dataset. “I’ll enact a law to it make it legal.”
CHAPTER INFINITY
The bride wore white.
A white bikini.
The smallest bikini on Caphmiaultrelvossmuaf. And probably, thought Wayne Norton, the smallest in the history of the universe.
Kiru looked terrific, absolutely fantastic. He was so glad they were getting married, that she was to be his forever. She was dressed in the ideal outfit—for their wedding night.
But with all the other people around, human and alien, he wished she was wearing, well, more.
It wasn’t just the people, it was the cameras. The official opening of Cafe World was being transmitted to the whole galaxy. Autocams zoomed about everywhere, recording all the festivities and the premiere of every new dream palace on the island.
Norton had to bite his lip, forcing himself not to say a word about what Kiru was almost wearing. If he’d objected, his bride might simply have walked out on him.
That wouldn’t have been the worst of it.
The wedding was scheduled as one of the highlights of the opening ceremony. If Kiru had changed her mind, then Norton would have had to marry someone else. Pedro. And her husbands. Or a Caphafer. Or Major Diana Travis… alias Colonel Travis.
Diana had remained in her female guise and was dressed as a Red Indian chief. Or her version of what one looked like. She wore a feathered head-dress, which hung halfway down her back, but the feathers were metallic and kept changing colour, as if they had a kaleidoscope of lightbulbs inside. The fringes on her buckskin jacket and pants were of similar construction and illumination. At least her moccasins didn’t flash on and off with every step she took, even if they did have five-inch soles and ten-inch heels.
The bride was meant to be the centre of attention at her own wedding, but it seemed Diana was trying to steal the show. Norton was pleased, because it meant fewer eyes would be gazing at his wife-to-be.
He had to admit, however, that although he was convinced Kiru was the ultimate wonder of the galaxy, the non-humans on Caphmiaultrelvossmuaf were unlikely to spare her more than a passing glance.
Soon after their spaceship entered orbit, the Galactic Tax Authority representatives arrived to begin final negotiations with Diana and her associates. Norton wished he’d asked for his missing finger to be brought from Hideaway, so he could be reunited with it.
Discussions must have been successful, because later the same vessel disgorged hundreds of guests to visit the countless different attractions on what its owners hoped would become the new vacation capital of the universe.
In the past fifty hours, the island seemed to have doubled in size, with four times as many soaring red buildings. During that time, Norton was busy arranging his own wedding. The hardest part was coming up with a form of words Kiru would agree to. “Obey” had to go, as did “honour,” and she wasn’t even very enthusiastic about “love.”