In my mind's eye, I could see him as he moved above me. I felt him inside me again. His body thrusting into mine. Remembered how my skin had sung at his touch. I clenched my jaw and banished the thoughts. I wasn't going to do this.
“Well, if there's nothing to talk about.” Mindy filled the awkward silence. “I guess I'll head back to my classroom. Those math problems aren't going to write themselves.”
“See you at lunch,” I said. I didn't want to eat lunch with her and subject myself to another round of questions, but if I didn't, she'd get suspicious and call Adelle right then. Now, if I was lucky, she'd at least wait until she got home and have the rest of the night to figure out how she was going to react to what had happened.
“Sure.”
I caught her giving me a concerned glance before turning and leaving, but I didn't acknowledge it. Better to focus on the work and not think about anything else. I wasn't sure how well that would work, but I was going to try.
By the end of the day, I knew exactly how well that worked. The answer was: not at all. I was in the middle of a lecture about Romeo and Juliet's first meeting when the memory of Cade saving me popped into my head. I experienced my first pang of sympathy for Heathcliff and Catherine's angst. As I lectured on Austen, I wondered how her characters would have handled my situation. Well, not the escort part, but the friendship part. The books I'd spent my life escaping into no longer offered a place to hide.
A dashing hero with a dark secret. A lie. A betrayal and a broken heart.
My life had become one of those stories.
If you asked most teenage girls if they wanted their lives to be a romance story, they'd say yes, thinking of their handsome prince and the happily ever after. The problem was, they rarely remembered all of the shit the couple goes through to get their fairy tale ending.
And, of course, it is a fairy tale. Anyone who knows anything about the original stories knows that no one wants a real fairy tale ending. They want the Disney version. After all, who wants the version of Rapunzel where the prince gets his eyes poked out? Or how about the mermaid who chooses to die rather than the kill the woman the prince truly loves? And then there is my personal favorite… sweet little Snow White who ordered a pair of red-hot iron shoes onto her stepmother's feet, forcing the woman to dance until her feet bled. Most people don't know about the wicked queen crawling out into the snow and falling down a well after the princess's wedding.
With my luck, I would get a fairy tale ending, just not the Disney one. All I had to do was look at the kind of 'princes' I attracted into my life. Ronald was a real winner. And let's not forget Steven, the bastard who'd tried to get me drunk so I'd sleep with him. That, of course, led me straight back to Cade and how he'd come swooping in like Prince Charming rescuing the damsel in distress. Then he'd turned out to be a complete fraud, and not in a romantic Aladdin sort of way either. No, this was more the twist in the story where the guy everyone thought was the hero turns out to actually be the villain. And Adelle was the hateful step-sister who instigated it all.
I swore silently as I packed up my things. The day was finally over and I'd spent most of it thinking about Cade, both good and bad. I needed to get him out of my head. He wasn't a prince. I wasn't a princess, and this sure as hell wasn't a fucking fairy tale.
Chapter 3
I was halfway to the front door of my apartment building when I realized someone was standing in front of it. I raised my head, ready to ask whoever was there to please move, and the words froze in my throat.
Cade.
“What are you doing here?” I'd intended the question to come out with anger and strength, but I heard a note of something else mingled in. A true desire to know why he was there and a hope that it was because he really cared.
“I need to speak with you.” His voice was calm and even, with none of the arrogance or flirting that had been presence the other night.
I stepped past him, telling myself to ignore the flutter in my stomach and focus on the pain in my heart. I didn't want to hear a word he had to say. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to get that I was trying to blow him off.
“Aubree, wait.”
I actually hesitated at the elevator, as if my body was programed to obey. A flare of anger went through me which gave me the strength to move. I punched the third floor button harder than necessary and hoped the doors would close before Cade could slip in. But, my bad luck held and he stepped inside just in time.
He stood on the other side of the elevator, leaning against the wall in a casual pose I was sure he'd worked on for hours, perfecting it to draw the maximum amount of attention.
“I would like the opportunity to explain.”
I refused to look at him.
“A cup of coffee. That's all I'm asking for. Give me the time it takes to drink a cup of coffee.”
I folded my arms across my chest. In the time it took the elevator to go three floors, he had managed to weaken my resolve without even a real argument. I stepped out onto my floor and felt him follow. Fine, I thought. If he wanted to explain, then I'd let him. And then I'd tell him to get the hell out.
“One cup,” I said as I unlocked my door. “That's it.”
“Thank you, Aubree.”
“I told you I go by Bree,” I snapped as I walked inside.
“And I told you I prefer Aubree.”
I scowled, but didn't argue. It didn't matter what he wanted to call me. Soon, I'd never have to hear him say my name again.
My stomach twisted at the memory of how he'd said my name, the way it had sounded when he'd asked me what I'd wanted. No, I told myself firmly. I wasn't going there.
“Take a seat,” I said, gesturing toward the worn love-seat and faded armchair that were the only two places to sit in my living room. “I'll go get the coffee started. I wouldn't want to keep you from work.”
I didn't look at him as I went into the kitchen. As eager as I was to get him out of my apartment, I took my time getting the coffeemaker going. I needed to compose myself. I couldn't let him see how much his being here upset me. He couldn't know the truth about how I felt about what had happened or any of the self-doubts it had fed into.
When I was convinced I could handle whatever was coming, or at least keep it together until he left, I went back into the living room. He was sitting at the far end of the love-seat, his arm across the back of it, his body angled so that he was facing me as soon as I entered. It looked so much like a carefully orchestrated pose that the serious expression on his face seemed out of place.
“You wanted to talk.” I sat down on the edge of the chair. “Might as well get started.”
“First, I have to apologize for what must appear like callous and deceitful behavior.”
My jaw dropped and I couldn't stop the surprise from crossing over my face. I'd thought he'd either come on Adelle's behalf or... honestly, I didn't know what to expect, but a straightforward apology hadn't been it.
Cade straightened, leaning forward so that his elbows were on his knees. “I'm not ashamed of what I do, Aubree. And I didn't intentionally hide it from you. I assumed you knew about the arrangement. Adelle never mentioned she hadn't told you.”
I laced my fingers together to keep myself from folding my arms again. I knew it was a protective gesture and I didn't want to appear weak. “Well, she didn't.”
He frowned and something flashed across his eyes, darkening them to the kind of gray that a cloud turns just before a storm. “When she contacted me, she said she was hiring a perfect date fantasy for a friend. Everything else I told you was true. How I'd asked her for some details about you, how you didn't fit what I'd pictured in my head. I didn't lie about that.”