If he was surprised by my decision, he didn't show it. He did, however, ask, “What prompted the change of heart?”
“I'm tired of my friends acting like I'm some charity case when it comes to men,” I said. “And I'm sick of attracting men like my ex.”
Cade nodded and took a sip of his drink. “So what is it, specifically, you want out of this?”
I frowned, confused. Wasn’t he the one who was supposed to tell me that? “Whatever it is you think I need.”
For a moment, I could've sworn I saw something like desire flash across his eyes, but I dismissed it as a trick of light. I wasn't going to do that, read into little nuances and try to convince myself that I was different, special.
“All right,” he said, his voice neutral.
“Everything having to do with payment goes through Adelle,” I continued with the next point on the list I'd written down this morning. “Whatever you charge, extra expense, anything like that, you deal with her. I don't care how and when she pays you. It's between the two of you. I never want to hear about it. Ever.” I couldn't stop myself from adding, “Considering you've dealt with her before with this kind of transaction; I figured you two already have an understanding.”
“Makes sense,” he agreed. He leaned back in his chair, the tight t-shirt he was wearing hugging his muscles.
I could see it now, how his every move was designed to draw attention to his body. Despite myself, a stab of arousal went through me. That was good, I supposed. I wouldn't want to get into this with someone whose touch I couldn't stand.
“Since I'm not discussing money with you,” he said. “I suppose we should start on the other terms.”
“Other terms?” I was confused, but curious.
One corner of his mouth quirked up in amusement. “Trust me, there's plenty we need to talk about before we get started.”
I blinked. I hadn't expected this. I'd thought I'd come in, tell him to deal with Adelle for his payments, we'd set up a time to begin, and that would be it. I hadn't thought we’d need to have some lengthy conversation.
“First, there's one rule I have for clients who hire me for more than one session. No matter what verbal contract we've agreed to, this will end if you become emotionally attached.”
“Good,” I retorted. “And I expect the same if you become 'emotionally attached to me.' The last thing I need is you following me around like a lost little puppy.”
A look of surprise crossed his face and I caught a flash of amusement in his eyes. Both were smoothed away in seconds, hidden behind his mask. “Since we've agreed on that, I need to know your sexual history,” he said it so matter-of-factly it took me a minute to process it.
“Why?” I asked. “What does it matter? You know I'm not a virgin.”
He ran his hand through his curls and I wondered if it was a nervous habit or a planned gesture. “During a normal session, part of the process of the night would be to learn what the client wants. I'm usually quite skilled at discerning needs. But, for what you're asking, it's different.” He shifted in his seat and leaned his elbows on the table, clasping his hands in front of him. “You feel like there's something wrong with you.”
I opened my mouth to protest, then snapped it shut again. He was right. This was why I'd come to him in the first place.
“I need to know what that something is,” he continued. “Both what you think and the reality.”
I mimicked his position, trying not to think about how close our hands were. “What do you want to know?”
“You said you’ve only had sex with one man other than me.”
I nodded.
“How long had you and your ex been together?”
“Seven years,” I answered automatically. “We started dating my freshman year of college.”
“When did you begin sleeping together?”
This wasn't too bad, I thought. It wasn't like my choices were anything to be ashamed of. “My sophomore year.”
“So you were, what, nineteen when you lost your virginity?” Cade gave me a searching look. “And you're in your mid-twenties now?”
I nodded again. “Twenty-five.”
“So in those six years, you never had sex with anyone else?”
“No. I never cheated.”
“What about threesomes? Or your ex watching you with someone else?”
For a moment, I thought he was joking, but then I realized he was serious. “Um, no. None of that.”
“So you've never been with a woman either, right?”
Heat rose in my cheeks. “Adelle and I got drunk at a party in college and kissed, but I don't remember it. Does that count?”
Cade's lips twitched and I got the impression he was trying not to laugh. “No. Sorry.”
I sat back in my seat and put my hands on my lap. “Is that it? You know my whole history now. One guy, period.”
“We're not even close to done,” Cade said. “I need to know what you've done so I can get an idea of your boundaries.”
“What I've done?” I felt like an idiot even as I asked it.
“Was he strictly a lights-out, missionary style guy, or did the two of you at least try other positions?”
I glanced around, suddenly very much aware that I was in a public place. “We did it with the lights on and different positions, okay?”
Either Cade didn't sense how annoyed I was getting or he didn't care – I was betting the latter – because he got even more personal. “You've done oral? Anal? Toys? Any bondage? Spanking?”
“Shut up!” I hissed, my face flaming. “You have no right to ask me those things!”
He raised an eyebrow. “Aubree, you want me to teach you what I know but I can't ask questions?” He pulled his chair around the table so that he was sitting only a few inches from me. “You want me to wait until I'm balls deep inside your cunt, my finger in your ass before I ask if you've ever had anything in there before?”
My jaw dropped and I stared at him. He said it so plainly, I couldn't be offended. He wasn't trying to shock me or insult me. He was just proving a point. “Okay.” My voice cracked but he didn't laugh. I tried again. “Okay. I get it. And I'll make it easier for you. The closest thing to kinky Ronald ever did was some dirty talk, and there wasn't really even much of that. Mostly just 'oh, baby' and 'you feel good.'” I dropped my eyes on the last one and hated myself for it. “And I went down on him once at a drive-in back when we were in college. So oral and regular sex. No kinky stuff.”
“All right,” Cade said. “That takes care of sexual history.”
“I don't get yours?” The question shot out of my mouth before I could stop it. I looked up in time to see his look of surprise before he laughed.
“Hon, I've done it all.” He winked at me. “But if you want details...”
“No!” I quickly said. “Are we done?”
Cade shook his head and the feeling of dread inside me grew. “Now we need to discuss how this is going to work.”
I felt another snarky response wanting to escape and refrained.
“I'm your teacher, which means, entering into this, you are agreeing to do as I say.”
“Hold on.” I shook my head. “I don't think so.”
“Would you tell a piano teacher that you don't want to follow his or her instructions?”
“No,” I said. “But a piano teacher isn't going to tell me to spread my legs.”
“If they're a good one, they might.” Cade gave me his wicked grin again, the one that made me want to slap him and kiss him at the same time. “But seriously, you're asking for me to instruct you. That means you have to trust me to do my job.” His expression became serious. “I promise I will never tell you to do something that isn't for your benefit.”
“Really?” I let skepticism flow into my voice.
“I'm not saying I won't enjoy it, too,” he said. “But it'll all be part of your lessons.”