I winced as I climbed off of him. Whatever place deep inside he'd reached, there was an ache there now, mingling with what I had in my legs and pussy already. I had a feeling that tomorrow, I was going to regret agreeing to a Sunday meeting. I'd be feeling him for at least a day.
“I'll tell you this,” Cade said as he removed the condom and tossed it into a nearby trashcan. “You can definitely forget about being bad in bed as a reason why your ex left. You're a natural.”
I blushed, conflicted by the statement. Did being a natural mean I was some sort of slut?
“Aubree,” Cade said my name. “It's a compliment. You have a natural instinct for sex. It's not something that can be taught. You just need some polish. And confidence.” He pushed himself into a sitting position and tucked his now soft cock back into his pants. “When I'm done with you, no man will be able to refuse you.”
That all sounded good, I thought. And I definitely wasn't going to say no to more sessions with Cade, especially not with Adelle footing the bill. In a short amount of time, he was tapping into parts of me that I'd hidden from everyone, even myself to some extent. No matter his methods, he was doing what I wanted him to do. He was helping me become who I wanted to be.
Chapter 7
My session with Cade stuck with me into the beginning of the week. Part of it was the sex, the amazing sensation of him inside me, the pleasure of him filling me. Part of it was the memory of his eyes on me, his voice telling me what to do. But, what I found myself thinking about most of the time was how easily he'd been able to figure me out. He'd understood my insecurities, spotted kinks I'd barely acknowledged myself. I knew I wasn't easy to read since no one else in my life had seen those things before. He'd told me that this was what made him so good at what he did, knowing what women wanted and needed, but I couldn't help wondering if he was this accurate with everyone.
More than once, I told myself to let it go, to not read anything into it. This, I knew, was another lesson I needed to learn, and knew Cade would be the perfect teacher. I still believed in love, but I didn't want to equate sex with emotion all the time. I wanted to be able to have casual sex when I had an itch to scratch. I wanted to protect my heart until I found someone I could trust it with. To do this, I needed to learn how to separate physical pleasure from emotional intimacy. I refused to accept that I might just be wired that way. I had to be able to learn how to do it, and Cade was the perfect person to teach me.
The problem was, no matter how much I told myself to focus only on the physical attraction, I found myself drawn to him. I wanted to ask him personal questions, get to know him. There was someone very complex beneath the surface and I couldn't stop thinking about him. It was a bad idea to even entertain the thought. I considered this my own personal lesson. If I could keep having mind-blowing sex with Cade and not give in to my misplaced desire to explore a personal relationship, I could do anything.
During lunch on Wednesday afternoon, I was surprised to see a text from Cade. It was brief but still made things low in my stomach heat up.
Date Friday evening. I'll pick you up at your place at 7. Wear something elegant. No teacher clothes.
I immediately sent back a confirmation that I'd be ready at seven. It wasn't until the end of the day, when Mindy stopped by so we could walk to our cars together, that I realized by going with Cade meant I'd miss Friday dinner with my friends. I knew I should text him and reschedule. The only time any of us ever missed was if we were sick or out of town. The one I'd skipped after being stood up had been the first time I missed one of our dinners since a bad bout of bronchitis four years ago. We never scheduled dates on Friday nights, unless it was late and we weren't going out together afterwards.
“You know,” Mindy said as we braved the early October wind. “I was talking to Stanley Worthington, the guy who's subbing for Patrice while she's on maternity leave, and, apparently, he's not gay. And I know what you're thinking, but thirty-seven isn't that much older than you...”
“Thanks, Mindy,” I interrupted, determination making my tone a bit sharper than I intended. Making the decision was easier than I thought it would be. “But I already have a date this weekend. Friday night, actually, so I won't be at dinner.”
Mindy looked startled, and even a bit hurt, but I didn't apologize. This was exactly why I was going to Cade in the first place. I needed my friends to know that I could get a date on my own. I wasn’t their charity case. A part of me knew I was being too harsh, but after all of the shit that had happened since August, I was tired of being nice all the time.
“Oh.”
An awkward silence fell between the two of us and I sighed. “Look, Mindy, I appreciate what you've been trying to do, but I need you to back off. I'm perfectly capable of deciding who I want to go out with.”
She nodded. “I'm sorry. I've just been worried about you.”
“I know,” I said, softening. “But I'm fine. Really.”
She gave me a skeptical look, but didn't press the issue. “I won't do it again.”
At least, with her, I knew I could count on what she said. Mindy had great self-control when it came to those types of promises. She wasn't like Adelle, who let her emotions take control. Mindy would take me at my word. With Adelle, I'd have to prove it, and with Cade, I would.
I spent the rest of the week eagerly anticipating my Friday night with Cade. I wondered what he had planned. Another tryst in a hotel? What new orders would he give me? Would he touch me this time? The only problem with these thoughts were they sometimes popped up at the most inopportune times. Like when I was lecturing on the symbolism in Paradise Lost.
When the final bell rang on Friday, I was as eager to leave as my students. I'd spent all of last evening scouring thrift stores for the perfect dress and had almost given up when I'd finally found it. It was the perfect shade of deep blue to complemented both my eyes and my skin tone. It clung to my body and was low-cut enough to show off what little cleavage I had but not so low it was sleazy. Unlike the dresses I'd worn before, this one was floor-length, making me look even taller than I was, especially once I put on my heels. A slit up my right leg, however, showed up to mid-thigh.
Then there was the fact that I'd followed Cade's instructions regarding... grooming. I'd gotten myself one of those home waxing kits and used it last night. The experience wasn’t one I looked forward to repeating, but I had to admit that the sensation of my freshly waxed skin against the soft cotton of my panties was definitely something I could get used to. That, plus imagining the expression on Cade's face when he saw my bare pussy was enough to keep me uncomfortably moist nearly the entire day.
As soon as I got back to my apartment, I ate a quick meal and then headed for the shower. I took my time, lingering in a way I hadn't done since the morning of my wedding. I knew this wasn't a real date, but I liked the way Cade looked at me, how his eyes got dark when he was turned on. I liked being responsible for that.
By the time I was finished with my make-up it was almost six-thirty and time slowed to a crawl. My mind was racing with the possibilities of tonight. What kind of encounter with someone like Cade would require an elegant dress? Were we going out to eat first? It seemed too much like a date. And this wasn't about teaching me how to date. I could carry on an intelligent conversation over a meal once the initial contact was made. I knew how to do that quite well. Most of the help I needed wasn't outside the bedroom.
My face flushed. My previous encounter with Cade hadn't exactly been inside the bedroom. Was that what he was going to do tonight? Push my boundaries by us having some sort of tryst in public? My stomach clenched at the idea of Cade and me in a janitor's closet or a bathroom, desperately pulling at each other's clothes, eager to get off before someone caught us...