So I had to allow time for the hike when nature called, and it was easy to see that I was as much an outsider among the women in the features department as I was among the men in the newsroom. Whenever I entered this domain, there was a noticeable pause in the clatter of IBM Selectric typewriters all across the room. The faster a features reporter went back to typing, the more likely I thought we’d get along once the novelty of my situation wore off. Lydia was there, of course, but in those early days we went out of our way not to spend time together at the paper, so that we wouldn’t be accused of being unprofessional or wasting company time. We seldom spoke more than a word or two of greeting to each other until after work. Later I learned that some of these women-most of whom had worked for the paper for several years-had previously tried to move over to the news side. They had been turned down. One more reason I was so popular.
I could have eased some of this, I’m sure, if I had gone drinking after work with the staff, or out to dinner with “the girls.” The minute I was finished with work, though, I had to hurry home to my father.
I almost hadn’t taken the job in the first place. I half-hoped Mr. Wrigley would tell me that he still didn’t have a job opening for a woman in news, so that I could come back home to my dad and say, “I gave it my best shot, and it didn’t work out, so I’m going to stay home and take care of you.” But I’m not sure twenty-four hours a day of his rebellious daughter would have given my father much peace of mind, and my whole reason for coming back to Las Piernas-leaving behind a job I liked and a man I wanted to get to know better-was to make life easier for my father, to have time with him while I could. It did not seem likely that much time was left in that life.
My problems with O’Connor began on a Thursday, the day before I decided he was an asshole. Before then, he had merely been grim-faced and standoffish, but he was that way with everyone.
That Thursday, I had received permission from my city editor, H.G., to take a couple of hours off to take my dad to a doctor’s appointment-a follow- up visit after his first major cancer surgery. Part of Dad’s stomach was gone now, and he was weak and thin, but we were relieved: if the cancer had been worse, they would have taken the whole thing. He couldn’t eat much, he got sick a lot. He slept most of the day.
He was alive. Recovering. I said this to myself whenever some insistent fear for him pushed its way into my thoughts. I said this to myself a lot.
I had an assignment that day, too, to cover a school board meeting. There are not many assignments that are lower level than school board meetings.
Despite delays at the doctor’s office, I managed to get my dad back home before I needed to leave for the meeting. But the woman we had hired to care for him while I was at work called in sick. It wasn’t the first time, and I wondered if I should just tell her not to bother coming back. The thought of going through the interviewing and hiring process again was so daunting, I put off making any plan of action for seeking a replacement for her.
I called my older sister, Barbara. She wasn’t home. I reached her answering service-she has a business as an interior decorator. I left a message.
My father’s voice, once so strong, able to command anything, called to me as not much more than a whisper. I hurried to his bedside.
“Barbara won’t come here,” he said. “It’s because of your mother.”
“Mom died twelve years ago. That’s not much of an excuse for Barbara.”
“Your mother died of cancer. Barbara’s scared. Don’t judge her so harshly.”
“You think I’m not scared?”
“Oh, you are,” he said softly. “And I’m sorry for that.”
“Dad- I didn’t mean to say…”
“Hush. You’ve got more Kelly in you,” he said, taking my hand, “so I know you’ll be all right. That’s why I called you.”
We sat in silence. Probably nothing else in this life had cost my father’s pride more than asking me to come back home from Bakersfield. That gave me some idea of how frightened he was himself. I swore a silent oath: I would stop bitching about Barbara to him.
“I’m just going to sleep,” he said. “Don’t worry about me. You go on to work.”
“Dad, it’s only a school board meeting-”
“It’s your job. Go.”
Able to command anything, even at a whisper.
“Call the paper if you need to reach me,” I said.
“I will. I promise.”
But just before I left, he got sick to his stomach again. He had managed to get out of bed, so the bedding was okay. I helped him change into new pajamas and cleaned up the floor. I didn’t want to go, but he insisted that the next time he was sick he wouldn’t be such a damned fool, and he’d use the plastic basin on his nightstand instead of trying to get up.
“Go on, now,” he said, “do your work. I’ll die of guilt if you stay here.”
“Don’t talk about dying. Not from anything,” I said.
“Go.”
So I hurried to the meeting. I will admit that it did not hold my interest. My thoughts wandered to my own worries. I did manage to grasp the main issues under discussion. I rushed back to the paper.
I thought of calling my dad, but if he was asleep, I didn’t want to wake him.
I called Barbara. I got the answering service again.
My father and I knew that Barbara would be fairly useless in this sort of crisis. Neither of us had expected her to develop an ability to vanish that would be the envy of a magician.
I wrote the story about the school board as quickly as I could. I got it in just before deadline. I went home.
My father was sick all night long. I dozed off on a chair in his room sometime before dawn.
Barbara never returned my calls, but just as I finished dressing, I heard a car pull up in the drive. I looked out the window, expecting to see her Cadillac.
Instead, I saw a cherry red ’68 Mustang convertible. The woman who got out of it looked with disdain at the car next to hers in the drive-my Karmann Ghia. Her long gray hair was plaited into a thick braid. She wore blue jeans and an embroidered denim shirt.
My father’s aunt, Mary Kelly. I felt myself smile.
I opened the door and said, “What’s a night owl like you doing out and about so early?”
“Why haven’t you come by to see me? Never mind-I know the answer to that. Are you late to work?”
“Not yet.”
“Patrick called me last night, told me his helper was sick. I thought he meant you. Glad to hear it was just that other one. I don’t think she was good for him, anyway. Why don’t I take over for her?”
“Mary, that’s generous of you, but-”
“But nothing.” She looked me directly in the eye and said, “I want the time with my nephew. Patrick is dear to me.”
“I know he is,” I said, returning the look. “But you argue with him.”
“Of course I do. He needs someone to argue with-he’s a Kelly.”
“Not now he doesn’t.”
“Irene. Are you going to stand there and tell me that in the weeks you’ve been home, you haven’t argued with him once?”
She had me there.
She smiled and said, “Thought so. You can trust me not to do him harm, Irene. You know that.”
“Yes, I do. Thanks, Mary. If it’s okay with Dad, I’d certainly appreciate it. It would be-a great relief.”
“Prissy Pants isn’t anywhere to be seen, I suppose.”
“I do fear that one day you’ll slip up and call Barbara that to her face.”
There was a certain glint in Mary’s eye that made me quickly add, “That was not a dare.”