“Oh yeah?” I said, hearing how skeptical I sounded. “How’s that?”
“Because I’ve gone through it, too,” he said. “I’ve stood where you’re standing. I’ve been hunted, coerced, manipulated, and now I’m on the other side.” He took a deep breath and raked his fingers through his hair, laughing. “I have to say, they’ve really upped their game, bringing in that hot piece of reaper ass to win you over. They never tried that tactic on me.” He flashed me a knowing grin. “But
I guess we all have our weaknesses, don’t we?”
Distracted, Noah looked around at the shadows that were close enough to blot out every inch of concrete surrounding us. “I’ve got to go. They’re getting restless.” His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly and took a step back, drawing the shadows with him.
“Look.” His eyes darted around the dark yard. “I want to help you. There’s a lot more to say, but you’ve got to promise me something.”
I nodded, thinking I might agree to anything to get more answers. To get a sliver of hope. I didn’t know what to think about Noah, but one thing was clear to me. He was offering me some kind of lifeline. Maybe it wasn’t the kind I should be grabbing for, but when it was the only kind being offered, I didn’t want to let it go.
“You can’t tell anyone about me,” he said. “I mean it, Cash. I know that reaper girl might be pretty.
She might be sweet. But there is a side you’re not seeing. If they ever got their hands on me…” His gray eyes darkened and his entire body tensed. “They would destroy me. And don’t think for a minute that they won’t do the same to you. Trust Balthazar and his minions and you’re as good as dust. Vapor.
Do you understand what I’m telling you?”
“Yeah.” I nodded again and shoved my hands in my pockets to warm them. “Okay. I won’t say anything.”
“Good.” Noah smiled. “I’ll see you soon, then.” He gave me a two-finger salute, then disappeared into thin air.
I stopped cold and spun in a circle. He was…gone. In the sudden absence of him, the shadows slipped and slithered across the ground around me, staining the white concrete black. I swallowed, tripping over my feet as I backed up. I stumbled up onto the porch, knocking a potted plant over, and pushed through the front door. When I got inside, the house was sleepy and dark. Dad’s car was gone.
At least I wouldn’t have to hear it from him. After him catching me ditch class today, I’d kind of expected him to come home just to torture me. But that was something a good parent would have done. I grabbed the yellow note off the fridge and read Dad’s chicken scratch.
Pulling an all-nighter tonight. Big case next week. You have an appointment with Dr. Farber at
9:00 a.m. Be home in the morning to pick you up. Don’t even think about skipping out.
Dad
I crumbled the paper and tossed it into the trash. He was really doing this. Making me see a shrink.
After what I’d seen tonight, I wondered if maybe that’s exactly what I needed. I felt dizzy from the thoughts racing around my skull like a speedway. What was Noah? Could I trust him? He said I was like him, yet he was obviously scared of Anaya and anyone like her. What did that say about me?
I turned my hand over and touched the veins pulsing under the skin of wrist. There was a better question that I needed answered. What the hell was I? Remembering the darkness that lived under
Noah’s skin, I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. My T-shirt was damp with sweat so I tore it off and headed for Dad’s office. It’s where he kept his good bourbon. Dad said it tasted like a little slice of heaven. I thought it tasted like lighter fluid, but hey, at least it made me numb and sleepy. At this moment in my life, that’s all that really mattered. I filled one of Dad’s fancy glass tumblers and downed it all in one drink, then poured another and did the same. My throat burned, but by the time I made it to my bedroom and kicked off my shoes, everything felt warm and tingly. Nice. I left my jeans on and fell back onto my bed, watching the ceiling spin.
I couldn’t sleep. How was I ever supposed to sleep again after all of this? Especially when part of me was terrified that it would be that scary-ass blade of Anaya’s waking me up, or shadow demons waiting to suck the soul out of my eye sockets. I turned over on my side and watched shadows move across the wall. Sometimes, when my brain was fried from paint fumes and booze like this, I couldn’t tell the difference. The easiest thing to do was close my eyes and pretend they weren’t there.
I was inches away from the escape that sleep would provide when something pinged off my window.
I flinched and sat up, rubbing my eyes, wondering if it was Anaya. Hoping it was Anaya and hating myself for it. I wasn’t even sure if I should trust her at this point. Another tap. This time from a set of fingers. I climbed out of bed and pushed open the window. Emma stared back at me, her hair orange from the glow of the security light outside. I sighed and moved out of the way so she could climb in.
“What are you doing here?”
Emma pulled herself through the window and pushed the hair out of her face.
“I need to talk to you.” She clutched a bag to her chest and looked around the room as if she was expecting to see someone there. Then it dawned on me that she was looking for a girl. She had no idea how much things had changed. When she realized we were alone, she pulled out a thermos and a paper bag that smelled like cookies. It would have been a hell of a lot easier to let her go if she’d stop trying to take care of me, reminding me why I loved her so damn much.
I fell back onto the bed and sighed. “About what? I thought we covered everything. You’re dating
Death and I’m being stalked by shadow demons.” I peeked at her under my arm. “Does that cover it?
Oh yeah, and now a reaper for Heaven is babysitting me like there’s a freaking countdown clock to death stamped on my forehead. But hey, at least she’s hot. Could be worse, right?” I carefully made sure to leave Noah out of it. Maybe I didn’t know everything about him, but he was the one offering me actual answers. I wasn’t about to jeopardize that.
“Wait.” Emma’s brows furrowed and she narrowed her blue gaze on me. “A reaper showed herself to you?”
I nodded and she sank down onto the bed beside me, looking so much like the worried little girl who used touch the space between my eyebrows and tell me everything would be okay when I was missing my mom the most.
“Who is she?” she asked. “What does she want with you?”
I pressed my lips together, trying to keep it in. She couldn’t help me. Why did she even want to know? In the end, my need to tell her everything inside me won out. “Her name is Anaya. She’s been following me since the fire. She just showed herself to me today.”
“Anaya?” Emma shook her head, staring down at her lap. “And what does she want? Tell me exactly what she said.”
I probably shouldn’t mention that I’d practically tried to feel the girl up. That I couldn’t get her out of my head. That even now, there was something in my chest aching over the fact that she’d been hurting and she wasn’t here now. God, how far would I have let it go if she hadn’t stopped me from touching her? Yeah, she was hot, and sort of sweet, but she was also dead. Maybe Dad was right.
Maybe I really did need to get my head checked.
I brushed the curtain of blond hair away from Em’s face so I could see the emotions playing there.
“She said she’s waiting for me. That it’s only a matter of time before…”
Her head snapped up and her eyes glossed over with moisture. “Before what?”