“My, aren’t you lovely,” he said, waving the boy beside me away. “Thank you, Darius. You may go.”
The tall man raised a brow at me when I didn’t offer any words. “Aren’t you going to ask me if you’re dead?”
I shook my head and bit my lip. “No. I already know I am.”
He nodded and walked in a circle around me. “That’s right. You did this, didn’t you?”
After he’d come full circle, he stopped and pursed his lips. “I could call you brave or stupid. I’m not sure which is more appropriate.”
“Can I see Tarik now?” I whispered, fear eating away at my voice. “My father?”
“Did you think it would be that easy?”
I felt my brows scrunch together. Yes. I had. Why else would I have plunged a blade into my heart?
He laughed and settled a hand on my shoulder.
“Oh dear, what a mess,” he said. “No, beauty. I’m sorry, that is not how it works. There are some rules that even I cannot bend. And taking a life is one of those rules. The punishment for breaking that rule is Hell.”
“H-hell?” My voice quivered. “But it was my life to take. It belonged to me. No one else!” My heart, on the other hand, did belong to someone else. It was useless without him.
“No,” Balthazar’s voice turned hard. “Your life belongs to the Almighty. He has a plan for each.
And, Anaya, dear”—he shook his head—“you’ve sort of made a mess of his plan.”
“Please…” I managed to whisper through the fear that consumed me.
He studied me for a moment, and stroked his chin. “I have a compromise.”
“Compromise?”
“You work for me,” he said. “Curry souls to the afterlife as a reaper. A collector of sorts. Like
Darius.”
I swallowed. “You want me to be Death?”
A strange smile lit up his face. “Yes.”
“Will it get me to Tarik?”
He glanced at the gates and smiled. “It will get you to the other side. Yes.”
“Then I’ll do it,” I said, stepping forward. “I’ll do anything.”
When the memory faded I was shaking. Balthazar wound his arms around me and let me fall limp against him. An unexpected gesture after our previous encounter. My chest heaved with sobs, but no tears ever came. This ghost of a body wouldn’t allow that. What had I done? What had I given up?
How many lifetimes had Tarik wandered this earth while I was so sure he was at peace? Balthazar stroked my hair and sighed.
“I could have been more…forthcoming, I suppose.”
I pulled away from him. “You manipulated me into this existence.”
“I didn’t want to see you in an eternity of flames, Anaya,” he raised his voice. “You fault me for saving you from Hell?”
“No,” I said. “No. I don’t fault you, but I am asking for your help now. I’m asking you to make this right. Don’t doom him to the kind of existence I’ve been working to escape for a thousand years. Undo this. Let him live.”
His face softened and the cloud base below him rose and bubbled until it took the form of a chair.
Balthazar sat and a sigh escaped him.
“His body has expired. There is no help for him.”
“Then stop the shadow demons,” I begged, falling to my knees. “Send them away. Send him a guardian. At least give him some peace in his final hours. I can’t protect him from this—”
Balthazar narrowed his gaze at me. “Have they touched him?”
I nodded. “Yes. They’re getting more aggressive every day. And I can’t be there every waking—”
“How close is he?” He stood and started to pace.
“He’s close.” My voice shook.
He nodded. “Good.”
“What will you do with him?” I took a step back.
“He is a shadow walker,” Balthazar said, the blue around his pupils burning like a flame. “You have no idea how valuable your human is. It’s rare for a soul to cycle through as many times as his has, to collect that much energy. In a human form he has more power than you could dream of. He can walk freely between worlds. He can force a soul into corporeality for capture. He could waltz straight into the depths of Hell and fetch me a demon if I commanded him to. And he’s going to be mine. He’ll work for me, collecting the souls that flee from you. In time, we’ll rid the world of all of the lost.”
“You…you can’t just use him like that,” I said. “He’s done nothing wrong. He has a right to cross beyond those gates. You would take that away. To use him?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Were we no better than those of the underworld now?
Balthazar turned on his heel and stared out onto the horizon, hands folded calmly behind his back.
“Yes. And you’re going to help me.”
Chapter 24
Cash
I sat on my bed in the dark. The laptop screen glared back at me as I trolled WebMD and Wikipedia.
There were a lot of half-ass guesses to what was wrong with me, but none of them were right. There wasn’t one article on what to do when you’re living in an expired body. My gut told me the answer to that was to give up. There was no cure. No solution. Just a question mark on the door that would open to the afterlife. Which afterlife I was going to was just another thing I didn’t know.
I slammed the laptop shut and leaned back into my pillows. The house was too quiet. Too vacant.
No Dad snoring. No muffled sounds of Seinfeld coming through the bedroom wall that connected our rooms. Just me. My breathing. The wind beating the house.
And the hissing.
I tensed and sat up, my eyes searching the dark. It was useless to even try to see them this way. The dark was their camouflage. My fingers twitched on the comforter, wanting to flip the light on, but I was afraid of what I’d see. How many were here this time? The hissing was getting closer. Louder.
Goose bumps rose across my arms. Calm. Anaya said I had to stay calm. Get control. I inhaled a deep breath and let it sit in my chest, burning my lungs. It was too cold. I finally coughed and let it out.
Another hiss echoed through the dark.
“Screw this.” I leaned over to flip on the lamp.
Light exploded across the dark, but the shadows were quick to snuff it out. My hand flinched back as one slithered up onto the nightstand.
“Youuuu commmeeee.”
I looked up at the large shadow standing at the end of my bed. It was a big black shadow of a man twice my size. It cocked its head to the side and held out a hand. Black smoke like fingers curled toward me, beckoning me to follow.
Fear closed off my throat. Where was Anaya? God, please let her come back. Now. Like right freaking now.
“What do you want?”
“Youuuuuu,” the shadow man hissed. Something dark and sludge-like dripped from the cavern of his mouth, and I jerked my legs up before it could land on my shin.
“Look,” I said, gripping the comforter. “I’m not who you want. If you had any idea how much
Jägermeister I’ve drunk in the last three years, then you’d know there’s no way I could ever taste good.”
“Come!” It shouted. That sound sent panic ripping through my chest. It was a deep growling sound that wasn’t human or animal. I needed to get out of there, but I was cornered by a wall of hungry darkness on every side. Adrenaline surged through my veins, or maybe it was something else, something that made me believe I was capable of doing what I decided to do next. My eyes scanned the room. Jeans on the floor. Keys on the dresser by the door. I could do this. Pain ripped through my chest as I dragged in a breath of air, then two. Holding the last one in, I reached out and grabbed the shadow demon between me and the exit by the throat. Sparks flew and a blue stream of vapor seeped out of my veins, latching onto the demon, binding it to my wrist. It hissed, setting off a symphony of growls all around as I slid off the bed, taking it with me. A second shadow broke away from the rest and snapped at me. I grabbed it with my left hand. I felt dizzy. Electric. The sensation almost enough to numb the burning sting developing over every inch of bare flesh that the shadow demons touched.