I wasn’t a rocket scientist, but I could connect the dots. And they were leading me to Finn. He had to have answers. And he was damn well going to give them to me. He’d stolen the most important person in my life. Deluded her into thinking she was in love with him. Filling in the blanks for me was the least this bastard could do.
Breaking this fucked-up voodoo love spell he had on her would have to come later.
Fueled by determination, I started toward the table and noticed that Emma was upset. She had on that blue sweater I gave her for Christmas last year. I always liked how it brought out the almost sapphire hue in her eyes. And now, those eyes looked tired, her lashes dark and wet. Had she been crying? Emma looked up, catching sight of me across the room, and her face lit up. I sort of hated myself for missing her in that moment. If I really meant what her eyes said I meant, she wouldn’t have kept all of this from me. Left me in the dark. Because now that dark was eating me alive from the inside out.
When I got to the table I tossed my bag down on the bench, and as much as I hated to, sat down next to Finn so I could face Emma. He had her hand wrapped up in his like a present. I noticed his fingers squeeze hers as I sat down, and I ground my teeth.
“Hey,” Emma said, brokenly. She had been crying. Shit. And I’d really had my heart set on being mad for at least a month.
“Hey,” I said.
“You’re back.”
“Yeah, well, it’s go to school or see a shrink.” I fiddled with my earbuds. I hated small talk.
Especially when there was something this big between us. “I’m trying the school thing.”
“I tried calling you.”
I looked up, and she brushed the curtain of blond hair out of her face. “Yeah, I know.”
Finn shot me a killing look and sat back in his seat, letting Emma’s fingers fall out of his. “Stop punishing her.” He pinned me with that freaky-ass green gaze of his. He didn’t look like his perky self.
He had dark circles under his eyes and his T-shirt looked like he’d slept in the thing. He looked like crap. I would’ve told him so myself, but I was pretty sure I didn’t have room to talk.
“She lied to me.” I folded my arms across my chest and shuddered when a ghostly shadow slithered down the white brick wall and under the table. I could feel it curling around my ankles. Filling my lungs with ice. I coughed into my fist, needing the ice out.
Stay cool. It won’t hurt you. It won’t hurt you.
“I didn’t lie!” Emma looked up at me, eyes glistening with hurt.
“You kept it from me,” I whispered across the table. “Same difference.”
Emma folded her arms onto the table and leaned closer, her blue sweater balled up in her fists.
“Would you have believed me?”
“I—” I stopped. I wouldn’t have. Before all this…no way would I have believed her if she’d told me she was dating a freaking reaper. A dead guy. And that he’d magically come back to life to be with her. Hell, I probably would have driven her back to Brookhaven Psychiatric Hospital myself. I took a deep breath and said, “No. I wouldn’t have believed you.”
“Then why are you avoiding me?” she asked. “I know there’s something wrong. Why won’t you tell me? Why won’t you let me help you?”
I kicked at the thing crawling around my feet and gritted my teeth. My pulse raced. I tried to swallow the lump of fear that was lodged in my throat, but it wouldn’t budge.
“You can’t help me, Em.” I sucked in a painfully deep breath that stretched my lungs and turned to
Finn. “You, on the other hand…”
Finn sat up and his brows furrowed together. “What do you mean?”
Stealing a quick glance around the crowded cafeteria to make sure no one was close enough to hear, I leaned across the table and lowered my voice.
“You need to tell me what the fuck is going on,” I whispered. “I’ve got these… things following me.
I know I’m not crazy. This shit is real. And it all started the night of that fire, so in my eyes, it all comes back to you, dead boy.”
Finn sat back, shaking his head as his gaze darted back and forth between Emma and me. “What exactly do you mean by things?”
“How the hell am I supposed to know what they are?” I pushed my fingers through my hair and blew out a breath. He was going to make me explain it. Say it out loud so we all could hear just how batshit crazy I sounded. “They look like shadows. At least that’s the best way I can describe them. But they’re not shadows. It’s like they’re alive or something. They never leave me alone. Day, night, sleeping, awake, they never fucking leave me alone.”
“Shadow demons,” Finn breathed, sitting back and lacing his fingers over the back of his neck.
“Shit.”
“Excuse me?” I raised a brow at the word demons. He had to be kidding. Please let this guy be kidding.
Finn clenched his jaw and his eyes drifted to Emma.
“W-why would shadow demons be following Cash?” Emma’s face turned white. “I though they only came around when someone dies?”
“Someone want to tell me what exactly a shadow demon is?” I asked. “You can leave out the visuals. I think I’ve got that at least.”
“When I was a reaper,” Finn lowered his voice, “I took souls to the Inbetween where they got the chance to be reborn or earn their way into Heaven. The problem is, the life span of a soul is only about ten years. As time passes, they decay. Lose themselves and the humanity that lives inside. They can’t exist in limbo like that forever. If they’re not reborn, or don’t manage to earn their way upstairs within those ten years, they turn into what you’re seeing. Shadow demons. They’re souls that are damned to roam the Earth, hungry and wanting for eternity. They feed off of souls, usually ones fresh from the body. You see them at reaps a lot, hunting for scraps.”
“Why would they be following me?” I asked. “I’m not dead.”
“I don’t know why they’re here. I don’t know what they’re waiting for. And I sure as hell don’t know how to get rid of them.” Finn rubbed his temples like he was getting a headache. “I need to talk to Easton. He’d know more about this.”
“So, talk to him,” I shouted, slamming my fist down onto the table. “Today. Hell, right now.”
“It’s not that easy,” Finn whispered. “I can’t just call him up. It’s not like they gave me a cell phone to the afterlife. I’m alive now. I’m not connected anymore.”
I stared at the table. “So, what? I’m just supposed to go on with these things following me around? I can’t do that. I can’t live like this!”
“He visits me sometimes,” Finn said, hesitantly. “But it’s been a while.”
“Great,” I muttered. “I’ll just clear my calendar then.”
I leaned over and pressed my forehead against the cool tabletop, trying to calm my breathing and the sharp pain developing in my chest. Emma’s fingers slipped over my folded arms and as much as I wanted to push her away I didn’t. After a week of nothing but fear and pain, it felt too good. I missed her.
“You did almost die at the fire,” Emma offered. “Maybe it has something to do with that. Maybe they’re just curious and they’ll go away once they realize they can’t get anything from you.”
I listened to Emma’s glossed-over, hopeful theory, but lifted my head to keep my eyes on Finn. He twisted the cap to his water, keeping suspiciously silent on the subject.
“Finn?” she asked. “What do you think?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “Like I said, I need to talk to Easton or Anaya. They’d know more about this.”