‘Great.’
They turned towards the ring road and, to make conversation, he asked how the election was going.
‘Labour will win big, I’ll lose small. By-election gains always go back to the party that used to hold the seat.’
‘You’ve beaten their guy once, you can do it again.’
‘I doubt it, but thanks for your confidence. I might not have got into this lark if it hadn’t been for you, all that time ago.’
They reminisced about the student union election because it was safer than talking about the present. Slowly, Nick unwound. By the time they pulled up at the university, he was almost relaxed. Sarah hadn’t changed, he decided. Nor had he. People didn’t change: they adapted their behaviour to fit the circumstances life threw at them. Sarah was about to be unemployed, like him. They weren’t so far apart.
Sarah parked at the back of the lakeside pavilion with its crumbling plaster and rowing boats for hire.
‘They’re planning to knock this down soon,’ Sarah said, as they got out of the car. ‘Replace it with a fancy arts pavilion – galleries, a theatre, you name it.’
‘Bet they don’t have discos,’ Nick said, referring to the only event anyone used to visit the pavilion for in their day.
‘Bet they don’t.’
Sarah took off her red rosette. ‘I’ll stop being the candidate for a few minutes.’ She peeled the red sticker from Nick’s People’s March For Jobs T-shirt. ‘I remember you buying this. Bit tight on you now. Where did those muscles come from?’
‘I don’t remember the last time I was on a march,’ Nick said. This was a mad place to come, he decided. They had so much history here. This used to be the place they would go in order to get Sarah out of her musty Union President’s office. They would come here when they needed to talk, or simply walk. Although part of the university campus, it was mainly used by townies. Children fed the ducks. Courting couples went out in the rowing boats. Family groups took constitutionals. On its right, larger side, the lake had a small island in the middle. The narrower left side ended in crossing stones and a shallow waterfall. Between the two stood a stone bridge, which led to a small patch of woodland. Nick and Sarah walked towards that.
‘Until you rang, I had no idea you were still in Nottingham. Once, I saw the back of your head driving a cab but thought I was imagining it.’
‘I’ve been away too. I expect Tony told you. I’ve made a mess of things, Sarah. I’m only just starting to put my life back together.’
A toddler on a tricycle was coming towards them on the path, trailed by her grandparents. Sarah was pushed towards Nick. She put her arm around his waist.
When the group had passed, Sarah left her arm where it was, and he reciprocated. ‘Don’t be ashamed,’ she said. ‘Why don’t we take a boat? Have you got time? Half an hour?’
‘Why not?’ Nick hadn’t rowed in twelve years. His arms were stronger than they used to be. It was a chance to show off. They turned back, paid a couple of quid and clambered into the rickety craft, both grateful to be occupied by activity.
‘Remember that night, after we saw The Specials?’ Sarah pointed at a tree where, early in their relationship, they had made love at midnight, jeans around their ankles, with a need for each other so urgent they couldn’t wait until they got back to one of their rooms.
‘How about that time we took a boat out to the island and got out to explore.’
‘You got out to explore,’ Sarah protested. ‘I was shit-scared we’d lose the boat and be stuck there.’
He was rowing easily now and began to ask the expected questions: family, friends, who there was in her life. Sarah was almost as bereft as him. More so, since she was an only child, while he had Joe, Caroline and a niece or nephew on the way.
‘Girlfriend?’ she asked.
‘I was seeing someone, casually. It’s over now. You?’
‘There was someone, but we split up last month. It wasn’t going anywhere.’
‘What will you do if you lose?’ Nick asked. ‘Stay around here?’
‘Doubt it. London’s where the work is. I’ve had a couple of offers.’
Nick was starting to sweat heavily. It was hot and this was the most physical exercise he’d had since getting out. ‘Mind if we take a breather?’
‘We used to do that, didn’t we? Just float.’
He gazed at her, feeling good about himself, better than he had done for years. He had to tell her everything that had happened. But not yet. There was no need to spoil this moment, not when birds were singing, the sun was shining, ducks drifting by and Sarah was smiling at him.
‘Do you remember why we split up?’ she asked, breaking the reverie. ‘I’ve been thinking about it and I don’t, not really.’
‘We never did officially split up, did we? We both had flings with other people, then were too proud or stubborn to call the other.’
She gave a wry smile of agreement, so he took the opportunity to ask a question that had been on his mind. ‘How long did you stay in the police?’
‘Just under three years. You were right about . . . a lot of things. I stuck it out longer than I should have done. As you said, I can be pretty stubborn.’
‘I kind of liked that in you,’ he said, and squeezed her hand.
They sat in companionable silence.
‘The half hour’s nearly up,’ she said, after a while. ‘I think we’ve played hooky for as long as we can get away with.’
‘Not before I do this.’ He leant forward and so did she. They kissed. Then they kissed again.
‘You’d better stop that before we have this boat over,’ Sarah said.
He pulled back, smiling, and took hold of the oars. ‘Worried one of your constituents will see you?’
‘I’m more worried about a freelance photographer with a long lens,’ Sarah said.
Twenty minutes later, she dropped him off outside the Committee Rooms.
‘Win or lose, there’s a party next Thursday night.’
‘I’m meant to be driving until late.’
‘I don’t suppose I’ll arrive before one. It’s at the Arnold Labour Club.’
‘I’ll try to be there,’ Nick told her.
She gave him her home and mobile numbers. ‘I’d like to see you again before then. Tomorrow?’
‘I’ve got a family thing. But I could do Saturday.’ He was meant to be driving but fuck that. He ought to pack it in. If, by some miracle, he could get back with Sarah, it was too risky to do anything that would break the rules of his parole.
‘I think I can free up some of Saturday night,’ Sarah said. ‘As long as you don’t stand me up again.’
‘I promise,’ Nick said. They kissed again, just a peck this time, as people might be watching.
20
The campaign was relentless, leaving little time to think. Easy, in these circumstances, for Sarah to compartmentalize her feelings about Nick, to put off thinking about him until Saturday afternoon. But there was one problem she had to find time for. Ask Polly Bolton. We tried to keep her out of it. The Chief Constable’s remarks had made no sense to Sarah, but she kept replaying them in her head. There was something nuanced about the way he used the words. Sarah tried to remember their exact context. She’d been asking about Ed Clark’s lack of motive for murdering Liv. She’d read the murder trial papers. Polly Bolton wasn’t called as a witness. Sarah couldn’t recall her even being mentioned in the trial. What was Eric getting at? He’d said something about Liv condoning what Terry had done. What had he done? Sarah couldn’t go to Polly again. Whatever motive Eric was implying, it had to go back to Ed’s original arrest and trial, for handling stolen goods.