And she would never find Bonnie if she couldn’t control the actions of this man who seemed to teeter back and forth on a lethal tightrope.
Think.
If she ran, then he’d be after her in a heartbeat.
Danner had Ranger training. She had been taught to defend herself, but she was not Catherine and did not have her skills.
Okay, then it had to be verbal attack.
“You don’t want to cut brush with that knife,” she said quietly. “You want to use it on me. Why, Danner? I’ve done what I promised. I thought you wanted to take me to Bonnie. Why give it up now?”
“The demons,” he whispered. “They’re trying to get to me. I can feel them push and pull at me. But I won’t let them do it.”
Demons. Use the demons that obsessed him to control him. “That’s right, keep them away. But you’re not thinking straight. You said you wanted to give me to Bonnie. What good would it do to kill me now? You had a reason to take me to Bonnie, or you would have killed me when we were with Father Barnabas back at the church.” She wasn’t getting through to him. Try another path. “Or do you think I’m a demon too, Danner?”
“I’m not sure. I didn’t … think so. The little girl didn’t think you were a demon. She wanted you.” He was frowning. “But sometimes the demons take over, and I can’t tell the difference until they’re ready to pounce. They don’t always look like demons.”
“I’m not a demon.” She turned and moved slowly back toward where he stood. Not too fast. No threat. She could already see him tensing. She stopped before him. “As you said, Bonnie doesn’t think I’m a demon.”
“But maybe she’s one now, too,” he whispered. “Maybe they caught her when I wasn’t around to keep them away.” His eyes were suddenly glittering with tears. “I hope they didn’t. God, I hope they didn’t. I have to stop them. I have to stop all of you.”
His hand was tightening on the knife. Eve could see the muscles of his body tightening, readying to spring forward toward her.
She instinctively braced herself. No, stop it before she had to defend herself. “Bonnie isn’t a demon either. I’d know it if she had changed.” She stared him in the eye. “Remember, you said you saw us together and you could see how much we loved each other. Do demons love? I don’t think so.”
“No, hate,” he said hoarsely. “Only hate.”
“Then you wouldn’t have chosen to take me to her if you hadn’t been sure that she had love for me. Isn’t that right?”
“Maybe. I’m confused right now.”
But his hand had never loosened on the knife.
“That’s because the demons want you to be confused. They don’t want you to take me to Bonnie. They know that if I’m with her, I’ll protect her, that I’ll never let them have her.” She took a step closer so that she was only inches from him. “I’d keep all the forces of darkness away from my Bonnie. There isn’t an angel or demon who could stop me from doing that. Look at me, Danner. You’ll see it.” She reached down and lifted his hand grasping the knife until the blade was pressing against her throat. She held his gaze with all the passion and strength of will that was her love for Bonnie. “See it,” she repeated fiercely. “And if you don’t, then use that knife that’s at my throat.”
It was a gamble. His hand was shaking, and she could feel the blade prick her skin.
Believe me, she willed the thought with every bit of her mind and soul. I have to bring my Bonnie home. It can’t end like this.
His eyes were flickering, shifting, changing.
Help me, Bonnie. Help me, baby.
He stepped back, and the hand with the knife fell to his side.
Eve let out the breath she hadn’t known she was holding.
The moment of danger had passed … for now.
Had she convinced him? Or had Danner’s madness, which always seemed to be hovering in the shadows, just retreated?
Or had Eve been given the help for which she’d prayed?
It didn’t matter. Danner’s eyes were clear, his expression as close to normal as she’d experienced since he’d taken her. She moistened her lips again. “You do believe me. That’s good. I’m glad that you’ve gotten over that particular misconception. I don’t usually have to defend myself against the charge of being a demon, and I have to really reach to do it.”
He was gazing at her in bewilderment. “You’re joking with me.”
“Purely involuntary. I admit to being a little shaken, and that’s how I generally handle it.”
“You’re frightened,” he said slowly.
“You caught me off guard. A knife usually has that effect on me.”
He was staring at her with an expression that had an odd element of regret. “I do have to kill you. I can’t do anything else. You didn’t seem afraid before. I was … surprised.”
“Get over it. As I said, you caught me off guard. This time self-preservation kicked in.” Her lips tightened. “You’re worrying that I’ll break my word about making it easy for you? You’re wondering if it’s worth it to you to wait and take me to where you want to … do it.”
“Yes.”
“I won’t lie to you. I’m not afraid to die. Sometimes there seems to be more waiting for me there than here. But that’s only sometimes. Self-preservation, Danner. If I can live, I’ll do it. But you won’t have to worry about my being difficult for you until after you’ve taken me to where I can find my daughter.” She met his eyes. “I’m not as sure as you are that she wants what you want. I’ll have to see.”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “You’re … honest. I knew that from the moment I met you when you were just a kid. You were pregnant and alone, and you were still fighting and telling the world to get out of your way.”
“I wasn’t entirely alone. There are good people in this world, Danner. I thought you were one of them. You would have helped me if I’d asked, wouldn’t you?”
“You didn’t ask. You didn’t want me. You didn’t want John.”
“Is that why you killed my daughter?” Her hands clenched. “You did kill her, didn’t you? Tell me.”
He didn’t answer. “I thought you were right, that John would want to be free if he came back from Korea. I was glad you didn’t want him to marry you just because you were having his kid. I would have helped you, but I didn’t want you hanging on John, keeping him back.”
Memories of that time were bombarding her. Nights of passion with John Gallo. The first moment she’d seen Bonnie at the hospital. This was becoming incredibly hard.
“I never wanted to hurt John,” she said unevenly. “But I did hurt him by keeping my daughter to myself. I never realized that until later. I was given a special gift, and I wouldn’t share it. Did you realize that I’d hurt him and wanted to strike back? I just don’t understand.”
“I’d never let you hurt John,” Danner said roughly. “I’d never let anyone hurt him.”
She’d struck a nerve. “Yet you’re doing it now. Don’t you know how John feels about what you’re doing? He loves you, and he can’t understand what you’ve become.”
“I know.” Danner’s voice was low and threaded with pain. “But I have to do it. I have to give the child what she wants so that she’ll go away and stop the torment.”
“Bonnie,” Eve said between set teeth. “I’ve told you—” It didn’t matter what he called her. Why argue with him? “You’ve told me yourself that John is probably right behind us. What will you do when he catches up? You may have to kill him to keep the demons away.”
“No, I won’t do that. He won’t catch up. We’re almost there.”
She jumped at the sentence. “Where?”
“Providence.” His lips twisted. “Did you think you were tricking me? It doesn’t matter if you know. Not now.” He turned and started up the trail. “Come along, Eve. By this time tomorrow it will be over.”
Providence. The only Providence she knew was in Rhode Island. Was it a real place they were going or a figment of Danner’s imagination? Or was it a term he was using to describe the situation? The last few minutes should have taught her how unstable he could be. Providence. Truth or fantasy, it was the only clue, the only weapon she had.
If she could find a way of using it.
* * *
“WHERE ON EARTH IS HE taking us?” Father Barnabas gazed at Ben, who was climbing the hill several yards ahead of them. “It seems as if we’ve been going around in circles for the last few hours.”