Richard was writing in a plain black notebook, and he kept writing as we walked in and stopped in front of his desk while the door swung silently back behind us. Only when it closed with a soft click did he close the book and look up. “Alex.” He nodded to me. “Anne. How was your trip?”
Anne and I stared at him.
“I asked you to visit today to give you an overview of your duties,” Richard said. “I understand you’ve been somewhat out of the loop, so I thought it best to give you the opportunity to ask any questions.” He looked between us, his eyebrows raised. “Before we begin, is there anything you’d like to bring up?”
Richard’s voice is deep and powerful, almost hypnotic. Standing, he blends into the background, but when he speaks he dominates any room he’s in. Sometimes, back when I was an apprentice, I’d go into a session with Richard meaning to argue with him, then come out an hour later thinking about everything he’d told us, and only afterwards would I remember what I’d planned to say.
But I wasn’t an apprentice anymore. “We aren’t here because we want to be,” I said.
Richard paused. “Excuse me?”
A part of me—actually, most of me—didn’t want to say anything. I was still terrified of Richard, and that part that remembered being his apprentice wanted to avoid anything that would provoke him. But if I stayed silent, I’d be accepting his authority. There wasn’t much I could do, but I could do this.
“You know how Morden motivated us,” I said. “We didn’t come because we wanted to work for you. We’re here because Morden told us that if we didn’t, he’d kill our entire families.”
“You have some quarrel with Morden?” Richard asked.
“Yes,” I said. “We have a quarrel with Morden.” At my side, Anne nodded.
“And yet it’s because of Morden that you’re alive.”
“That doesn’t matter!”
“Really?” Richard said. “As I understand it, without Morden’s intervention, you would have been turned into a fine mist of blood and body parts approximately two days ago. Assuming Levistus’s men didn’t manage to take you alive, in which case your death would have been considerably slower.” Richard looked at Anne. “Not you, of course. Though I believe you have reason to owe Alex some loyalty. Which suggests to me that both of you should be grateful to Morden rather than the reverse.”
Anne was silent, and I knew why. I’d had to trick her to get her to go along with that plan, and that conversation was one that was still hanging over my head. But I wasn’t going to let Richard deflect this onto her. “Morden didn’t help us to be nice,” I said.
Richard shrugged. “He is entitled to a measure of payment.”
I remembered Morden’s words, how he’d explained in detail that if I refused he’d kill everyone I knew or cared about, one by one, saving the closest for last, and white-hot anger flooded through me. “Screw his payment,” I said through clenched teeth.
“You’d prefer that Morden had stayed uninvolved?”
I glared at Richard silently.
“As you wish,” Richard said.
I flinched, but all Richard had done was reach down into a drawer. His hand came back into view holding a dagger. It was a short, heavy-bladed fighting knife with a hilt wrapped in black leather, and my mind raced as I looked through the futures. I couldn’t see any trace of combat, but—
Richard laid the dagger down on the desk, pointing towards me, and withdrew his hand. He nodded down at the blade. “Take it.”
“For what?”
“For yourself.”
I stared at Richard.
“I’m sure you know where to strike,” Richard said. “Though I’d appreciate it if you picked somewhere neat. Opening the throat or the wrists tends to make a mess, and I’d rather not replace the carpet.”
“You expect me—”
“To kill yourself?” Richard said. “If that’s what you want.”
“Why would you—?”
“You would prefer to die than be in Morden’s debt?” All of a sudden Richard’s voice was cold and hard. “Then here is your chance. Take that blade and turn it on yourself. There will be no retaliation, no reprisal killings. All that will happen is that you will be dead—exactly as you would have been had Morden left you alone.”
“That’s your idea of a choice?” I demanded.
“What did you expect, Alex? That Morden would solve your problems for free? And make no mistake, they are your problems. Your enmity with Levistus is entirely of your own making. You chose to provoke him, expecting . . . what? That there would be no consequences? There are always consequences. This is one of them.” Richard’s eyes held mine as he reached out to tap the dagger. “I have no use for children, nor for those without the will to live. Choose.”
Anger flashed up inside me, both for the tone of Richard’s words and for the fact that I didn’t have an answer. Because I’d already understood what he was saying, and he was right. Only a few days ago, I’d been about to let Levistus’s men kill me. Oh, I’d have made a fight of it, but there was only one way that it could have ended. If I used the knife on myself, all I’d be doing would be resetting the status quo.
But there was no way I was going to do it, and Richard knew that. And the anger had done one useful thing: it had burned away most of my fear. Right now I wasn’t seeing Richard as the teacher out of my nightmares; he was just another Dark mage, and I looked into the future to see what would happen if I turned that knife on him instead.
It was . . . closer than I’d expected. Much closer. In fact, to my surprise, as I looked at the futures of combat playing out before us, I actually thought that I might win. It was true that Richard wasn’t as defenceless as he looked, and I knew his reactions would be lightning-quick, but none of the futures ended with him simply blasting me with magic. He would use weapons and tricks and combat skill, and those were all things I could counter.
For the first time, I let myself wonder if I should be so scared of Richard. When I’d fled this mansion I’d still been a child. I’d had a long time to grow stronger. Maybe it was all in my head . . .
No. Richard wouldn’t have handed me a weapon if he hadn’t been prepared for me to use it. Besides, even if I could beat him, what then? Richard could have his victory of words. I could wait.
“Good,” Richard said when I stayed silent. He glanced at Anne. “I assume your answer is the same? Yes?” He put the knife back in the drawer and shut it. That’s that, his manner seemed to say. We’ve settled who’s in charge.
We hadn’t, but I wasn’t about to tell him that.
“Now as to your duties,” Richard said. “For the moment, both of you will be assigned to Morden. You’re now his liaisons to the Keepers and to the medical corps, respectively. As I’m sure you know, Morden has been working to expand the recognition and acceptance of Dark mages within the Light Council. I expect you both to act in accordance with that.”
“How?” I said.
“I am sure you are both quite able to figure that out for yourselves.”
“Where are we supposed to be staying?”
“Wherever you like.”