“And what if we take that risk and you were wrong, Alex? Then what?”
I hoped that wouldn’t be the case. “Then I’ll have to deal with it.”
His shoulder tensed under my cheek. “I’m not okay with that. I’ve already failed you once and—”
“Don’t say that.” Twisting in his embrace, I met his gaze and cupped his cheeks. “You had no idea Linard was working for the Order. You are not at fault for that.”
He pressed his forehead against mine. “I should’ve been able to protect you.”
“I don’t need you to protect me, Aiden. I need you to do what you’re doing now.”
“Hold you?” His lips twitched. “I can do that.”
I kissed him, and my chest squeezed. Never in a million years would I get used to being able to kiss him. “Yes, that, but I just need… your love and your trust. I know you can fight for me, but I don’t need you to do that. These problems—they’re mine, not yours, Aiden.”
His arms tightened around me, so tight, I found it hard to breathe. “Because I love you, we share each other’s problems. When we fight, we fight together. I’m going to be by your side no matter what, whether you like it or not. That’s what love is, Alex. You never have to face anything alone again. And I get what you’re saying. I don’t agree with it, but I will support you in any way I can.”
I was struck silent. There was really nothing I could say to that. I wasn’t that great with words, not those kinds of words. So I wrapped myself around him like a super-friendly octopus. When he leaned back, I settled over him, not caring that he was still in his Sentinel gear, daggers and all. Quite some time passed before either of us spoke.
“Seth’s not really a bad guy,” I said. “He can be prone to moments of great douchery, but he wouldn’t do something like take out the Council.”
Aiden’s fingers slipped over my cheek. “I wouldn’t put anything past Seth.”
I decided not to respond to that. Since the phone call after Linard’s attack, I hadn’t even heard from Seth. And now that I had calmed down a bit, I started to think logically about what Apollo had said. “Everyone fears Seth—the gods, the pures, and the Order—because he’ll become the God Killer, right?”
“Right,” he murmured. His hand drifted to my shoulder, brushing my hair back.
“Well, what if he doesn’t become the God Killer?”
His hand stilled. “You mean if we stop the transfer of power? That’s what we’re trying to do by keeping you away from Seth.”
“I seriously doubt that’s the sole purpose of keeping me away from Seth.”
“You got me there,” he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.
Tipping my head up, I decided it was way past time to clear the air. Aiden first… and then Seth, because the last thing I wanted was for anyone to be hurt over this. “I care about Seth—I do. He’s important to me, but it’s not the same. You know you don’t have anything to worry about, right? What Seth and I had… well, I don’t even know what we had. It wasn’t a relationship, not really. He asked to try and see what happens. And this is what happened.”
Aiden caught a strand of my hair between his fingers. “I know. I trust you, Alex. But that doesn’t mean I trust him.”
There was no winning this with him. “Anyway, I can talk to Seth and let him know what’s going on with the Order and what people fear.”
“And you think he’ll go along with that?”
“I do. Seth won’t force me into anything by using the… connection against us.” I wiggled up Aiden’s chest and kissed his chin. “Seth once told me that if things ever became… too much, he’d leave. So there is a way out.”
“Huh, he actually said that?” His eyes burned silver. “Maybe he’s not so bad.”
“He’s not.”
“I don’t like this, but like I said, I will support you any way that I can.”
“Thank you.” I kissed his cheek again.
A sigh shuddered through him. “Alex?”
“What?”
He leaned back, watching me through heavy lashes. “Did you guys eat all the cookie dough last night or did you actually make any cookies?”
I laughed at the turn in conversation. “We made some. I think there might be a few left.”
“Good.” He placed his hands on my hips and tugged me forward, pressing our bodies together. “What’s Valentine’s Day without cookies?”
“I think the mortals put a lot of emphasis on chocolate this time of the year.” I placed my hands on his shoulders, and the stuff with angry gods, Order members, Seth, and everything else took the back seat. “But cookies work.”
One hand slid up the curve of my spin, slipping under the mass of tangled hair and sending a fine shiver over my skin. “So there’s no lame Christmas tree involved?”
“There’s no such thing as a Mortal Holiday Tree.” My breath caught as he guided my mouth toward his, stopping just as our lips brushed. “But… but I’m sure the mortals would appreciate the thought of that kind of tree.”
“You do?” He pressed his mouth to one corner of my lips and then the other. Eyes drifting shut, my fingers dug into his shirt. When he kissed me slowly, pouring all his unstated passions into that one act, his powerful body tensed under mine.
I couldn’t remember what we were talking about. There was just the heady, wild rush of feelings that stormed through me. This was Aiden—the man I’d loved for what felt like forever, in my arms, under me, against me, and touching me.
“Happy Valentine’s Day,” he murmured.
Aiden held me close and still, and in those moments, he showed rather than told me just how much we were in this together.
CHAPTER 24
I’D FANTASIZED SO MANY TIMES ABOUT WHAT IT would be like to be in a relationship with Aiden. There had been days, not too long ago, that I would’ve smacked that dream right out of my head because it seemed so hopeless. But for a week I lived that fantasy to the fullest.
We stole as many moments alone as we could, filling them with deep kisses and quiet laughter. And plans, we actually made plans.
Or at least we tried to.
My back arched and a giggle escaped.
“Oh, so you areticklish?” Aiden murmured against the flushed skin of my neck. “This is a very interesting development.”
It seemed that, when we were together, we could never keep our hands off each other for very long. Aiden had to be touching some part of me. Whether it was just a slight contact of skin, his hand wrapped around mine or our bodies flush with our legs tangled lazily, we were alwaystouching.
Maybe it was because he’d fought it for so long or maybe we both were crazy, intoxicated by the simple act of just lying together, and we were addicted to it. Our legs pressed together and our heads rested on the arm of the couch in the room with the family portraits. It was safe in here as no one dared to enter it. What had once been Aiden’s sanctuary had become ours.
Today was no different.
But it wasn’t all fun. As the days passed and I knew Seth’s return was approaching, anxious energy built inside me. There was also barb-tipped guilt that sank in deep. Sometimes, when I thought of him, I remembered those glimpses of vulnerability he’d shown after our midnight swim in the Catskills and the day after I’d been given the brew. Seth was a lot of things, almost a complete enigma at times, but under it all, he was a guy who… who cared, and he cared about me. Maybe more than I did for him. Maybe not, but I didn’t want to hurt him.
I wiggled on the couch beside Aiden, trying to shake the sudden dark cloud that’d settled over me. Talking to Seth wasn’t going to be easy. Then again, I had no idea how he would respond. He’d been with Boobs…so maybe it wouldn’t be that hard.