“I don’t know about that,” I whisper.
“You will.”
“Oh really? How do you know that?”
“Because I can see all the potential you have. You’re just blind to it,” Keegan says. “If you want strength, you need to eat.” He shoves more food in my direction, and I laugh out loud.
“I’m going to barf if I eat any more.” I push his tray away. “So how do you get all this food anyway? Everyone up top has to scrounge for it.”
“We grow some down here. We barter for the rest.” He shovels in a mouthful of potatoes and keeps talking. “Told you we have connections.”
“Eww, your manners suck. You’re spitting food all over me.” I pick up a napkin and wipe my shirt.
He laughs and more falls out of his mouth onto the table. “Like seafood?”
I swat him and laugh. Some things never change.
The others at the table look at him and then at me. It’s the first time I really see them. They smile politely and laugh along with us. We’re an athletic group, a multicultural quilt of people. I feel at home here and almost safe.
This time I run faster, hit harder, and Keegan matches me up against some of his guys. We wrestle, and I get pinned a few times.
“Damn it. Push yourself!” Keegan shouts. He circles the room, keeping his eyes on everyone. He stops at my mat, evaluating me as I roll around. “Wow, that was impressive! I’m glad you’re over that idiot.”
I clench my teeth and ball my hands into fists. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Oh, but I would give anything to deck him right now.
“At least he allowed you to train well. That’s all the credit I can give that—Wow!”
I reverse my competitor’s guard and end up in a full mount. My smile takes up my entire face. I stand up, and shake hands with my opponent. He’s a little taller than me and slim, but I still beat him.
The training is rough. In the beginning, my body hurt everywhere, but I feel it adjusting to the grind. The daily torture dampens my mental anguish because I’m too busy to think about Cole.
“That’s it for the morning, guys. Go rest up,” Keegan puts his arm around me. “When the revolt breaks out, I want you on my team.” He turns to walk toward the showers.
I chase him, tugging at his shirt. “What do you mean?”
He continues walking, so I match his stride. “For the main operation, we divided everyone into teams. I’m assigning you to my team. One, because I want to look after you, and two, because you’re that damn good.” He cracks his neck and stops with his hand on the light switch. People pass, but we don’t move.
“Who leads the other teams?”
“Sutton, Bruno, and a lot of others… People you haven’t met. Why?” His eyes search mine with a cool stare.
“Just wondered,” I mumble. Obviously Bruno’s alive if he’s going to lead a team, I think with satisfaction. If he’s still kicking, then chances are so is Cole.
“For God’s sake, please tell me it’s not because of him.” His cobalt eyes see right through me. “He can’t be trusted, and for that reason alone, he’s not welcome anywhere near my group.” He takes a deep breath. “Enough about him. Go shower. I’ll catch up with you later.”
I start to speak again, but he’s not in the mood. He slams the switch down and the lights flicker off. The room feels lonely and smells like body odor.
I shuffle to the women’s showers and tiptoe past the stalls before anyone can talk to me.
“I love you, Lexi. You’re all I want. You’re the air I breathe, the very reason for my existence,” Cole says as he kisses along my jawline, my ear, and my neck. Bright light frames his perfect face, and warmth from his body radiates against mine.
I wrap my arms around him, pulling him closer. “You have no idea how much I love you,” I say.
His eyes light up, and he pulls my left hand to his chest, fingering my ring. “I’ll never let you down,” he says.
I wake up drowning in perspiration and twisted sheets and grasp at my heart as the tears flow down my face. Pain courses through my entire body, causing me to heave. I sprint to the bathroom down the hall to puke and return, collapsing on my bed.
Even though I haven’t seen him in weeks, his face appears in my dreams regularly. It haunts me to remember the hurt in his eyes, his face when I chose to fight with Keegan over him. But I didn’t choose it over him. I chose to fight for us, for my father. My mind twists, desiring to see him, yet I’m nervous he’ll hate me for everything.
The longing always seeps back in despite my attempts to keep busy. The longing for his face, his voice, and his body against mine. I retch in pain while remembering how he touched me. His hands caressed me here, and I touch my cheek. And here. I touch my lips.
I take the ring off my left finger and read the inscription again. “Dad, if you hear me, please, watch over Cole. There’s no way I’d overcome losing him,” I whisper.
“Morning! Hope you’re ready. We have a busy day. First, training, second, a meeting, and then lunch. Everyone’s expected to be punctual—including you! So no farting around,” Keegan says as he walks into my room unannounced.
“Would it kill you to knock?” I ask, sitting up in my bed. “Or is that too much to ask?”
“What’s it matter? Are you trying to hide something from me?” he asks with his arms folded across his chest.
“No, I just want some freaking privacy.”
He arches his eyebrow and evaluates me for a minute. “Whatever. Get up and let’s go.”
“Fine.” I stand up, pull on my boots, and draw my hair away from my face. When I finish, he rolls his eyes and exhales deeply, as if searching for an ounce of patience. Then I follow him down the hall as he enters a few other rooms to rouse people.
He leaves halfway through training and we continue on like good pupils.
Two hours race by. My brain spins from experimenting with pressure points. I see stars when they practice on me. One person passes out, and the medical personnel take him away.
Everyone rushes to shower and meet at the main conference room. I have no idea where to go, so I follow the crowd. They stand outside the heavy doors, waiting to go in. They all form their cliques, but I stand alone against the wall. The light above me keeps flickering, but no one seems to notice. It’s quiet except for the murmuring within their closed circles.
Keegan arrives, and everyone parts like the Red Sea. Several large, armed men follow him. I glance at his entourage and am surprised to see Sutton, Bruno, Zeus, and Cole following along. Sutton nods his head my direction but says nothing. Zeus lunges, jumping and licking my face.
I stumble backward into the wall, laughing. “Zeus! How’s my boy? I’ve missed you!” I wrap my hands around his big ears and scratch his head. The joy is short-lived when I notice everyone staring at me.
Keegan looks mortified. “Please get that stupid dog away from her,” he says.
Cole and Keegan’s men move toward Zeus, but he refuses to move. He plants himself in front of me and bares his canine teeth with ferocity. They try to grab his collar, but he growls and snaps at them.
“It’s fine. Just let him stay with me, unless you want someone to get hurt.” I put my hand through his collar and he doesn’t mind. When I look up, Cole’s eyes meet mine for the first time in weeks. I’m stunned like the first time I met him. He looks more appealing than ever. His hair is newly faded, the way I like it, and his short-sleeved T-shirt gives a glimpse of his well-muscled arms. Something like regret passes behind those familiar, dark eyes as he approaches me, and I want to dive into his skin.