If you were young in the 1980s, you probably read at least one Choose Your Own Adventure novel. Getting to pick your own way through the story always seemed so thrilling, until you came to the end and realized no matter what choices you made, it always turned out the same. Sometimes you even found yourself stuck in a loop, repeating the same stupid action over and over.
It was good training for real life, wasn't it?
Our next story isn't a cautionary tale of government gone bad or a social principle run amok. It's quite simply an analysis of civilization, and the chilling recognition that for good or bad, people in groups just can't seem to get things right. Historians will agree: society after society keeps making the same ridiculous mistakes.
Just like your characters did when you steered them through those Choose Your Own Adventure books.
You have a civilization! It doesn't matter which one — let's say it's modern Western civilization. It's got fast food and sporting events, which is all you really need. Western technology gives you great military power — you have fantastic unstoppable tanks, and heat-seeking missiles to keep you safe. It's a good place to start.
You could also have chosen a remote aboriginal tribe in the center of Australia — one with nuts and berries, and spears and ropes. Or you could have chosen Communist China, or that group of scientists living in Antarctica. But let's stick to modern Western civilization. Let's give you people, too. We'll call them John and Jane. If you have a civilization, then you probably have at least two people in it.
Now, with your civilization comes a political system. Maybe your system is a democracy, and everyone gets a vote except the felons and child molesters. Maybe your system is a republic, and you market it as a democracy because it looks better on the brochures. Maybe your system is totalitarian, and you force everyone to enjoy the sound of that complicated word. Totalitarian!
But! A major choice awaits you. Are you traditional, bound by the past, certain that the old ways are the best because "we've always done it that way, so there"? Or are you radical, lured by the future, always hoping that the new ways will be better than the old because "we've never done it that way, so there"? Be warned, the future of your civilization depends on your choice. John and Jane's lives are at stake.
If you choose tradition, go to section 2.
If you choose radicalism, go to section 5.
You're a traditionalist. Or a blind follower. Or just someone who reads everything in order, from start to finish. It doesn't matter; you end up in the same place anyway.
So, you have a civilization. You have TV dinners and expensive cars. You hold elections. This is the way it's always been done, and this is the way it must be. Never mind those fruitcakes in wigs who fought against the colonial powers. They were supporting Freedom and Liberty and other words that make great advertising. The corporations live off the people and the people trust the corporations. John and Jane relax, knowing that everything around them has worked for centuries.
Things stagnate. You hold more elections, or pretend to. The people in power have always been in power. The world is the way it's always been. The police have always arrested people in the streets. The freedom to speak has always been restricted in the name of security. The corporations destroy the people and that's the way it's always been, and why would you question that, citizen?
Congratulations! You've got fascism!
Go to section 3.
How nice for you, that you look so good in jackboots and a uniform! Your secret police are so dangerous that they're sexy. They kick the enemies of the State in the street, like Rockettes in steel-toed boots. You sleep with national security books on your nightstand and a revolver under your pillow. Or maybe you just have secret meetings of secret societies in secret boardrooms, sealing fates with secret handshakes. The artists fill the gulags, and hey — cheap labor! So what if it's not fair and equal? Equality is for hippies. John and Jane trust you to keep them safe at all times.
When you're fascist, you're always right, because God or Satan or your left boot told you what to do. Divine power is with you! that means that you're right, and you'd better make sure everyone else knows it too. Let's go to war!
Go to section 7.
You've been in power an awfully long time now. Why pay attention any longer? there's too many good shows on TV (or in the bullring, or in the arenas, or whatever you've got). You talk about the great sporting events on television and visit fast-food drivethroughs. You worry about whether your toothpaste is really doing all that a toothpaste should. After a while, you stop paying attention to anything at all. John and Jane are off doing something, but you're not sure what. This is the way it's always been, and this is the way it will always be. Is this progress? You aren't sure.
Go to section 2.
You decide to experiment. Artists love your society. Painters color skyscrapers, and sculptors make art of garbage. Directors shoot movies in black light and show them in darkened theatres. Musicians shred the works of previous centuries. Corporations hold festivals to mock their own logos.
People are changing things from the way they've always been, just to make changes. Broken furniture becomes the new fashion. Everyone lives with six uncles and an aunt. John and Jane change their names to Isthmus and Quagmire. No matter what the new idea is, it must be better than the old. You remember that you haven't changed governments in a while. Throw out the old! Bring in the new! It's time for a revolution!
Go to section 6.
You hand out pamphlets in the street. Citizens march in protest of everything. The Hero of the People takes over in a bloodless coup. The former powers all commit a penitent suicide: on the same day, in the same prison, under your watchful eye. How convenient! You take note of all the former rules — because if that's how they did it, now you must do it differently. You charter a new Constitution in a different font from the old one. Oh good, this regime is much better than the last one!
You suppress the counter-revolutionaries. They want to change everything. Any disagreement in society must be squelched. John and Jane must have their freedom. For the good of the new regime!
Go to section 4.
Oh boy, it's war! Your regiments march like clockwork toys. Colonel Mustard is your general, with his dashing moustache and monocle. Your hats are quite classy, with a feather for each soldier (for officers, two!) On the streets, your noble supporters weep with pride as their loved ones march past. The people support the Cause (both sides, if it's a civil war). Or if they don't, you silence them, for national security. Jane blows John a kiss as he shoulders his weapon and heads away. He'll come back a hero, and they will marry.
Your soldiers fight bravely. They pose for photos every time they save a small child from Tyranny. There's no blood — at least, not in the photos. The enemy can't oppose the side of Truth and Justice, which you're quite certain is you.