“Khol—I . . .” This was going to be harder than I had originally thought. I loved Khol, I really did. He just wasn’t Bryn. Despite that, my body responded to Khol’s, and a feeling of liquid heat bloomed inside of me. But the difference now was that I wouldn’t let myself get swept away in those feelings. I wouldn’t let the ease of our relationship rule my decisions. No one ever said love was easy.
I felt Khol’s body tense around me and he pulled back from our embrace enough to meet my eyes. His bore into mine, and after a moment’s time, but what seemed like forever to me, he backed away from me completely. “I see.” His voice cracked with emotion.
“Khol—I—please—I’m sorry. You know I love you—you do. And you’ve got to believe me. I never would have done . . .” My voice caught in my throat as my mind skidded over the memories of the intimate moments Khol and I had shared. “I never would have . . .” I tried again, but this time was stopped short by the look on Khol’s face. It was a mixture of hurt and anger. And my heart cracked just a little for him. Why did he ever have to fall for me? Why did things have to be so complicated?
“So, you’re back to wanting Bryn again,” he said without question. “And if he still doesn’t want you?”
“He wants me,” I whispered. “He’s just afraid that being with me will result in my death.”
Khol’s face had lost all emotion, and he looked at me with a mask of neutrality, which was worse because it told me how much he was hurting. “And if it does? Result in your death?”
“Then it’ll be my fault, and none of yours. I should be able to protect myself.” And that was the truth of the matter. No one was ever truly safe, not really. And relying on someone else for security would result in my suffering no matter which way I looked at it. I had to rely on myself for my own protection.
“So my little Seer has finally become our little queen.” Khol gave me a smile that didn’t touch the sadness in his eyes. “I told you that you’d find the strength in you one day.”
I stood and went to him, cupping my hand to the side of his face. “Thanks to you.”
He brought his large hand up to cover mine and leaned into my touch, meeting my eyes with intensity. A familiar feeling of electricity shot through my system. I always felt sparks when Khol touched me. “I can’t lose you . . . again.” His voice was hoarse from raw emotion. “He doesn’t deserve you.”
I tried to pull away from him then, but he held me to his face with his strong fingers. “I don’t care what you think,” I said as anger began to build in me. “I can’t help that I’ve loved him practically all of my life. I need him almost as much as the oxygen I breathe! I loved him before I even met you!”
I could feel the muscles in Khol’s jaw spasm as he ground his teeth together. “And yet you came to my bed. And you trembled so sweetly under my fingers and tongue.” His words were soft but there was no mistaking the underlying cruelty that they meant to inflict on me. “You had no need of him to help you breathe when I let you do the same to me. And you happily made love to me with your mouth.”
My lower lip began to tremble as tears gathered in my eyes. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but I hadn’t expected Khol to be cruel, to use all of my fears against me. He knew I felt slutty for doing what I did with him, and for still being involved with Bryn. There was no way he didn’t know with his close emotional connection to me. He was just trying to hurt me like I was hurting him . . . and it was working. “Don’t,” I squeaked. “Please don’t say those things to me.”
“You mean the truth?”
I opened and closed my mouth not knowing what to say. He was right; of course, nothing he was saying to me was a lie . . . not really. It was then he captured my lips with his, and as I gasped in surprise, he swallowed down all the breath in my lungs. I struggled against him, even as his body made mine hum with excitement. I was attracted to him, still . . . and just because I loved Bryn more didn’t change the fact that I loved Khol too.
He pushed me back onto the bed and pushed my arms up over my head, holding me in place as he continued his assault on my senses. I couldn’t help but moan when he ground himself into me. Even when he had essentially blackmailed his way into my pants by threatening Bryn’s life, Khol had always brought me pleasure. Why would now be any different?
“Khol—stop—please,” I begged when he freed my mouth only to begin kissing a trail of fire down my neck and other more sensitive areas.
“I won’t lose you again,” he growled.
It was with those words I knew how truly desperate he had become to have me for keeps. He was about to do what he swore he would never do to me again. He was going to take from me without asking—he was going to claim me against my will. As in the past with Khol . . . it wouldn’t be rape . . . not really . . . but it wasn’t exactly what I wanted either. At least not mentally. Or maybe this is what it means when someone says another person seduced them? Was Khol seducing me? As my body arched up into his touch, I was pretty sure I had the answer, and I was not happy.
“Don’t do this to me, Khol,” I hissed. “You promised.”
“And you promised to wait—to wait until the child was born. We all agreed.” He freed me from my shirt and bra, and while he still held my arms over my head with one hand, his callused palms skimmed roughly over my naked flesh, eliciting a moan from me. And I hated him for it.
“You were going to cheat. You admitted it—and I changed my mind,” I grated as I felt my dragon fire magic push up through me as my anger began to heighten. How dare he pull this crap with me again? Maybe he hadn’t changed as much as I thought he had. “Khol, stop, before I make you.” My voice had changed, dropped to a low animalistic growl. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”
Paying no mind to my words, Khol tugged at my pants, tearing them from my body. I lay before him now, with only a tiny lace thong keeping me from being completely naked—something in the past that would have been sexy, but now—I was pissed.
An inhuman scream erupted from my chest as I pulled the strength from somewhere to push Khol off of me. In fact, not only did I manage to push him off of me, but I threw him clear across the room to where he landed in a heap on his ass with a dazed expression on his face. I pulled myself up to my full height and let my fire magic explode from my palms.
Khol, with almost no effort at all, captured my magic in his own palm and smiled at me. “This little display of power—it only makes me want you more,” Khol rumbled as his eyes raked over my nearly naked self, causing goosebumps to erupt all over my flesh. “You’re acting more and more dragon with every passing moment, and that means I’m the one you belong with.”
“I belong with Bryn.”
“He’s too human. And beyond that, he’s a Black Dragon. Your powers clash. Your flames would consume him and leave nothing behind. Even weaker Red Dragons are no match for you.” Khol paused and offered three words to me in a hushed voice, “Think of Drake.”
I knew what he was referring to—when I had first discovered my dragon fire magic I’d nearly killed Drake—a Red Dragon. “I would never hurt Bryn. I love him too much.”
Khol raised one of his eyebrows at me in question. “Like Jenna.”
“That was different. That was—”
“Over me.” Khol’s voice held a note of triumph, like making that point alone would win me over. All it did was make me angrier.