“I'm glad you like her,” Douglas said comfortably. “How was your summer, by the way? I never asked.”
“Interesting,” she said honestly. She was more at ease with him than she'd been the year before. Everything had been new then, and she had felt intimidated by him. He was impressive certainly, but he didn't scare her anymore. They were almost like old friends. “Peter moved out. And in with his new girlfriend. The girls left for college. My nest is empty finally. Everybody flew the coop, including Peter and me.” She smiled ruefully, thinking of how times had changed in the last year. Now she was back here again. And Bungalow 2 was her home, for the making of another film. “I guess you were right. My days in Marin are over, for now anyway.” And possibly for good.
“That's a good thing,” he said confidently. “I could never see you there.” It had been perfect for her for twenty years, and for her family. Now she had to find her way and make a new life for herself. She was still adjusting to the concept. It still seemed shocking to her at times. “How about a day at the pool again this Sunday? Same rules apply. Conversation not required. We can both relax.” She knew life would get crazy on the new picture soon, and it sounded appealing. She had enjoyed it before, particularly when he played the piano. She hoped he would again.
“I'll try not to snore this time,” she laughed. “Thanks for the invitation.”
“Eleven o'clock Sunday. And sushi one of these nights. Maybe next week, before the insanity begins.” They had preproduction meetings coming up. Tanya was looking forward to them now that she had met Adele. It was going to be fun working with her.
She waved as Douglas drove away in his new Bentley, and then she went back to the bungalow. She worked on the script all afternoon, inspired by their meeting, and sat at her computer late into the night. She tried not to think of Peter when she finished work. It was odd being back in the bungalow, and no longer his wife. They had filed the divorce in June, it would be final in December. Twenty years gone, except for the kids, and a house she no longer wanted to go home to. He belonged to Alice now. And the bungalow at the Beverly Hills Hotel felt more like home. It was strange how life changed. And sad.
Tanya saw Molly on Saturday afternoon and took her out to dinner. Afterward she took her back to her dorm. They had had a nice time, and talked to Megan and Jason on Tanya's cell phone. It was nice knowing they were all close by, particularly Molly, whom she felt so close to. They had talked about the divorce over dinner. Molly admitted that she was still shocked about her father moving in with Alice and leaving her mother. It was hard to explain or understand. Molly told her mother she had to move on, no matter how hard it was. She asked her mother if she had any interest in dating, and Tanya told her honestly that she didn't. She couldn't even imagine going out or, worse yet, sleeping with someone else. She had been involved with Peter for twenty-two years in all. It seemed unthinkable to her to go out with another man.
“You'll have to one of these days, Mom,” Molly encouraged her.
“I'm not worried about it. I'd rather work.” After that they discussed the hot boys at USC. Molly had already met two she liked.
And after Tanya went back to the hotel, she lay in her bed that night, thinking about her conversation with Molly. The prospect of dating anyone seemed horrifying. Even though Peter was living with someone else, she still felt like his wife. She couldn't conceive of being involved with someone else. She had no desire to date anyone. All she wanted was to see her kids and work on the new film. As for dating, she told herself, maybe one day, but surely not yet. And maybe never.
The following morning, Tanya took a cab to Douglas's house, for their promised quiet Sunday at his pool. He was as hospitable as he had been before, the day was as relaxed, the weather was even more beautiful, and this time when he served her lunch, they chatted for a few minutes about the new picture, and then went on to other subjects. She managed not to sleep this time and swam in the pool. It was an easy, pleasant day. As tense as he was sometimes, on the set and in production meetings, she was surprised again by how easygoing he was at home, particularly on lazy Sundays at his pool.
“How are you doing with all these changes in your life?” he asked her in the early afternoon, as they sat in lounge chairs side by side. He was good company and had given her several words for the New York Times crossword puzzle. She was impressed by how proficient he was at it. He knew it had to be a big adjustment for her to be getting divorced, and an enormous disappointment after how staunchly she had defended her marriage. He had never expected it to happen to her, and he suspected she had expected it even less. He had no real idea what had happened, but he was sure it had been a major heartbreak for her. She looked thin to him, and sad sometimes, but she seemed to be doing remarkably well, and he admired her for it. He had invited her to the pool that day to cheer her up.
“Honestly?” she said, answering him. “I don't even know. I think I'm in shock. A year ago I thought I was happily married, with the most wonderful husband in the world. Nine months ago I discovered that he had cheated on me. Six months ago he told me he wanted a divorce to live with what was previously my best friend, and the woman he cheated on me with. And three months from now I'll be divorced. My head is spinning,” she said to Douglas as he nodded. It was quite a recital. The disintegration of her marriage had moved with the speed of sound. It seemed dizzying even to him and must have been agonizing for her.
“It's pretty amazing,” he agreed, “but you look like you're doing all right. Are you?” he asked with a look of concern. Sometimes, he could be a very nice man, especially on home turf. Out in the world, at a conference table or on a movie set, he could be tough as nails.
“I think I am. I'm not sure what the operating standard is here. How nuts am I supposed to feel? Because sometimes I feel pretty nuts. I wake up and think I dreamed it, and then the wrecking ball hits my gut again, and I remember that it's real. It's a pretty nasty way to wake up.”
“I've had times like that myself,” he confessed. “We all do. The trick is to get through them with a minimum of bitterness and damage. That's not as easy as it sounds. I'm still bitter about some of the bad experiences in my life, and scared to death as a result. I imagine you must feel the same. It sounds like all of it came as a big surprise.”
“It did. I thought I was happily married. Shows what I know. Don't ever ask me for relationship advice. I still think my husband …my ex-husband,” she said with effort, “went a little nuts. Not to mention my best friend, who demonstrated a total lack of integrity. As you put it, it was very disappointing.”
“Have you been out with anyone since?” He was always curious about her, and intrigued. He loved how bright she was. And how well she wrote.
She laughed. “That would be like asking Hiroshima survivors if they've been to any good bombings lately. I'm not exactly anxious to try again. This may have cured me forever. My daughter was telling me last night that I need to start dating. I don't think so,” she said, staring at the pool and looking dazed, thinking back over the past few months. It was mind-blowing when she really thought about it. She tried not to most of the time. “At my age I don't need to get married again. I don't want more kids. And I'm not even sure I want to date. In fact, I'm almost positive I don't. I don't want to take the risk of getting my heart broken again. What's the point?”
“You can't go into religious orders either. And I don't imagine you want to be alone for the rest of your life.” He smiled gently at her. “It would be a terrible waste. You'll have to get brave again one of these days.”