Brant took a book down, said:
‘Here’s an interesting title, “The Killer Inside Me,” think I might borrow it?’
Crew shook his head, said:
‘Breaks up my collection, so I don’t lend books.’
Brant seemed amused, went:
‘Ah, go on.’
Crew looked at Porter, said:
‘Your sergeant doesn’t seem to understand “no”.’
Finally Porter got to ease a bit, said:
‘Oh, he understands it, it’s just he never accepts it.’
Brant left the book on the table, and Crew said:
‘Could you put it back where it was?’
Brant fingered the spine, said:
‘Seems well-worn, well-thumbed as you book lovers say’
He put it back down. Crew waited and Porter said:
‘You keep a diary, Mr. Crew?’
‘Of course.’
They were surprised, had expected all sorts of denials, evasions, and for a moment, they were lost for a reply. Then Porter asked:
‘Mind if I see it, sir?’
Crew stood up, moved to the phone, said:
‘I wonder if I should perhaps call legal help?’
Brant was all charm, his voice friendly, went:
‘That is of course your right but you show us the diary, we clear up a misunderstanding, and we’re outa here. You go back to your scotch and soda and chill, no harm done.’
Crew frowned, asked:
‘What is the misunderstanding?’
Porter took up the flow:
‘A young lady, claims to be your… significant other, says she saw you mention an act of violence in your diary’
Crew seemed astounded, said:
‘Mandy, the… working girl I’ve had… am… recourse to… once or twice. That’s why you’re here. Good lord, clues must be scarce. The Met running out of actual crimes?’
Porter moved right up close to Crew, said:
‘Three years she says, and you move her in across the street, hardly a casual deal, is it, Mr Crew?’
Crew laughed, a short bark, said:
‘The word of a hooker, that’s going to be solid.’
Brant asked:
‘The diary?’
Crew went to his desk, a fine oak affair, and picked a leather volume up, tossed it to Porter, said,
‘Enjoy.’
Porter flicked through it, looked up, said:
‘This is your business diary; there’s nothing personal here.’
Crew fixed another drink, less soda, said:
‘For me, business is personal.’
Porter let that sit, then asked:
‘How do you feel about manners?’
Crew looked puzzled, said:
‘What on earth does that mean?’
Brant joined in, said:
‘It’s not a real difficult question, like, do you think they matter in the world, how we treat each other, is that a factor for you?’
Then Crew put his hand in the air, went:
‘As Oprah says, “I’m having a light bulb moment.” This is about that Manners guy, is that it? You think I might be the guy?’
Brant asked:
‘Are you?’
Crew said:
‘I’d like you to leave now. See, I’m asking politely, lots of manners, which is more than I can say for either of you.’
Porter moved towards the door, but Brant hadn’t moved. He stared at Crew, asked:
‘I can understand a guy using hookers, hell, it’s part of the whole consumer society. But what I don’t get is, you’ve got lots of cash. You look reasonably okay, yeah?’
Crew waited then asked:
‘Is there a question there?’
Brant now began to move towards Porter, nodding, said:
‘Well, it’s not really a question, but given all I’ve said, how the hell did you go and pick such an ugly cunt?’
Then they were outside, and the door closed behind them. Brant lit a cig, said:
‘You think he really watches Oprah?’
Porter was still looking at the door, said:
‘Lots of guys watch her.’
‘It’s a gay thing, right?’
They’d got to Clapham Common. Brant put his hand in his pocket, took out a book, said:
‘Now let’s see what the deal with this is, why he was so keen for us not to see it.’
He had The Killer Inside Me in his hand. Porter yet again was astonished, went:
You nicked it, jeez. You think he won’t notice?’
Brant was flicking through the book, said:
‘I want him to notice.’
Porter said:
‘There’s a nice cafe down here, they do really good coffee, you coming?’
He was.
Porter ordered a decaff latte and looked to Brant, who ordered a double espresso. Said he’d have the caffeine that Porter was skipping, oh, and bring him some really disgusting sticky, creamy bun.
Porter said:
‘Are you serious about the pastry? The waitress doesn’t know whether you’re kidding or not.’
Brant, stuck in the book, said he was as serious as murder.
But little guys with wild hairs up their ass, there was no book on guys like that.
21
The cops were here. I fucked up and big time. Worse, I had a couple of scotches while they were interviewing me. And that blew my focus to shit. I got complacent, figured I could handle them easy. Two of them, Porter, the senior officer, and a sergeant named Brant. Porter I pegged as a fag. He had all that fussy manner, nice politeness, and the body language so I figured to concentrate on him. I figured the sergeant was just dumb. Figured wrong. If anything, he was the sharpest. Cultivates the animal persona. You reckon he’s just pig-ignorant and brute force is the only game he’s got. I should have known when he zoned in on the books. But no, I was busy playing mind-fuck with the fag. Next thing, Brant has “the book” in his hands, asks if he can borrow it? So I panicked and said he couldn’t. Big mistake, now it was the centre of attention. When they asked for the diary, I got very stupid, gave Porter my business diary and acted all innocent. Pissing them off was not ever going to be smart and I just went right ahead and did it. Brant managed to distract me, so I never saw him pocket the book. They know of course I’m going to miss it, and thus they manage a double whammy. Think, damn it, think. There is no physical evidence, no way to connect me to the murders. Hell, they can’t even prove the murders took place. A decent lawyer would blow them out of court. But I’ve got them interested in me now, and that’s a real bad place. I wanted to play, but not up close and personal. The double act they had going tells me these guys are good. And my intuition says if they want my ass, they’ll get it, one way or another.
So they read the book and, sure enough, it’s going to sway them towards me being the guy they want. Can’t be helped. I wish I could have gotten a few more killings under my belt before attracting notice. What’s to be salvaged? Mmm, at least I know not to play at silly buggers. And the uncanny thing is, Ford, in the book, starts off so smart, so sure and undetected then, of course, the woman screws the whole deal, sound familiar? Jeez, I love the book, but I don’t want to be the ending. What I want to do is get out there and off some fucker but tricky now my cover is blown to shit.
Brant put the book down, said:
‘This novel, the main character is a sheriff, he kills people, likes to fuck with them, acts down home, friendly, and is laughing at everybody. Want to hazard a guess as to his name?’
Porter didn’t take long, said:
‘Ford.’
Brant smiled, said:
‘No wonder he didn’t want to part with it.’
Porter thought about it, said:
‘Nothing we could bring into court.’
Brant had another look at the book, said:
‘Least the fuck gets his in the end.’
Porter signalled for the bill, knew Brant wouldn’t be paying, said:
‘The murders can’t be proved to be anything more than accidental, so what can we do?’
Brant was in no doubt, said:
‘Lean on him.’