I stayed calm, letting my parents think I’d stayed away from my boyfriend, so they’d be unsuspecting. I couldn’t let on, because I knew they would find a way to intervene.
My father was the biggest hurdle. I waited for him to go to work. My bags had been packed for hours, and I’d conveniently hid them in the bush out front of my bedroom window. My mother was in the laundry room, and I was fully prepared to go without a goodbye until she caught me heading toward the door.
Her words caused anger to fill me. “Where do you think you’re going?”
I turned, nonchalantly giving her a half-witted smile. “I think you already know the answer, don’t you? We discussed this last night. Please don’t make a big deal out of it.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
My brow raised. I was done trying to appease my parents. It was time I lived for me instead of everyone else. “I would. I’m tired of living by your rules. It’s time I take what I want in life.”
“Oh,” she replied sarcastically. “And I suppose this has something to do with Brant?”
I didn’t falter. “It has everything to do with him.”
“You’re making a terrible mistake, Cassie. If you leave out that door you’re not going to be welcome back, not if your plans are to run away with him. We’ve been patient with you, but enough is enough. I’m tired of trying to convince you how bad of a person that boy is. If you want to run to him now, it’s going to be forever,” she threatened.
I snickered, almost getting a kick out of her gall. She certainly believed I’d back down because she was warning me I wouldn’t be welcome back. “Don’t be overdramatic, Mom. I know you’re full of shit. You don’t have to worry though, I won’t be returning to this hellhole anyway. I’m done being treated like your little slave. You can’t control me, and you never will.” I headed for the door, taking the knob into my grasp. “Oh, and don’t think you can call Daddy and come after me. We’re leaving this God forsaken state and never coming back.” I was bidding goodbye to North Carolina, no matter how much it hurt.
She pulled me by the hair, desperate to keep me from leaving. I heard the sound of a loud motor and knew it was Brant. My ride had arrived and losing a bit of scalp wasn’t going to stop me from running after him. “No! I won’t let you do this to your life,” she struggled to say while pulling me back. “Please Cassie.”
I twirled around, shifting my weight to have the upper hand, finally pushing her off me. She fell down to the floor, shocked and emotionally pained. I was breaking her heart by the second. “Don’t come looking. I’m done with this family. The more you search, the further I’ll go. Goodbye, Mom. I hope you have better luck with your other children, because you failed terribly with me.”
She got up and rushed in my direction, holding me from moving. I jerked my arms out of her reach and she slapped me. “How dare you?”
“How dare me?” I sighed. “You know, I get why your first husband beat you. You’re weak, and I’ll never be anything like you. You’re so fake. You say you live by God’s rules, but you’re a hypocrite. You were married to someone with a criminal record.”
“I didn’t know.”
“He was a horrible man. You could have left at any time, but you were afraid. I’m nothing like you. I won’t be afraid to take what’s mine, and do whatever I have to do to be happy.”
“This isn’t you.” She noticed the vehicle waiting outside for me. “Cassie, there’s things you don’t know about him – about his parents.”
I pointed in her direction. This was her last attempt to get my attention, and it wasn’t going to work. “Nothing you say will prevent me from walking out this door. I love him and he loves me. Have a nice life. Keep in mind this could have been easier had you just given him a chance. You pushed me away. You and Dad did this to me.”
In my defense I was talking out of my ass. I needed her to stay vulnerable so I could get a head start. In no time at all she’d be on the phone with my father, hopping in their vehicle to hunt us down. This had to be brutal. It had to hurt, or else I’d never get away. I needed to force myself to sever ties, so I could finally be free.
Chapter 1
Cassie
“Stop crying, Cassie,” Brant ordered for the second time in five minutes. We hadn’t even gotten an hour away from my uncle’s farm in Kentucky before I lost it. We’d run to their house first, mostly because I needed to see if I could gain some more funds from my rich family before we continued on to our destination.
Since that time, my boyfriend hadn’t been very sympathetic. Brant couldn’t understand what it was like to leave everything behind. My parents, my siblings, and the rest of our kin, which happened to spread between two states, were all worried about me. Little did they know I’d probably never see any of them again. Brant had made me promise I wouldn’t contact them, not even my closest cousins. This decision had to be final, probably because he knew the pull they’d always had with my emotions. It was obvious he’d never been part of a group of blood relatives who’d do anything for each other. Faith – family – love, it’s what we were raised to value. God was first, and afterwards it was our devotion to be good people. Though I couldn’t always understand, I did what I was told, like every good little country girl was taught to do.
When Brant came into my life things got a bit crazy. The more drawn to him I became, the further from my values I ended up. My parents were the first to see it, forbidding me from being around someone with such low standards.
Brant wasn’t like any of them. His heart was hidden under a slew of tattoos and criminal acts. Even though they couldn’t see past what was on the outside, I fell in love with the whole package. His bad boy image made me want to fight for his attention, and once I had it, I refused to back down.
I didn’t know the first thing about being bad, but I did a fine job fitting in with his crowd, dressing and doing the things they’d do for fun. I’d dabbled in drugs, only recreational, and later been caught by my parents. My father, having gone through his own stint of living on the bad side, years ago, was the first to freak out and promise to do everything in his power to keep me from going down a path I’d regret.
Mostly it meant keeping me away from Brant.
The more he tried to severe ties between myself and my boyfriend, the harder I had to fight to find ways to keep him in my life. I became deceitful, desperate, and a cold-hearted bitch. I’d chose to follow my heart, instead of the values and opinions of my family members. I’d sacrificed stability to throw caution to the wind and be with the crazy man I couldn’t get enough of.
He was my greatest addiction, and I gladly welcomed the high he brought me when we were together.
Even though my choice was made, I still had hope in the back of my mind that I’d be able to change everyone’s opinions and have a happy life. I’d hoped when we stopped in Kentucky to see my cousins, Brant would like it so much he’d want to stay there, instead of carrying on with his plan to tear me away from all of them. After all, without the constant badgering from my parents, I assumed he’d see the good in the rest of them, settling for new scenery over the unknown.
I’d always been close with my cousins. We spent our summers in Kentucky, and every other holiday. My father was raised on that ranch, and learned everything from living there. Growing up, I could envision settling down in one of the small homes on the property and starting a family, like many of my relatives had done. Brant could work the cattle with the men, while I took care of our two point five children and dog.
The truth, it was always a dream. Even if I wasn’t with Brant, no man would give up his aspirations of a better life to work with animal shit and family drama in the name of love. Nowadays couples struggled to remain together. When you add that with the parents I had, there was no hope for resolution. It was Hell or high water. I felt like I was living both at the same time.