I keep pouring the water over his chest, on his neck, and down the length of his back. As I dip one hand in the water and rub the coolness over his muzzle, I lay my head down on his neck, my tears pouring freely into his mane.
“I can’t lose you.”
He lifts his head, and my heart pounds in anticipation. But just as quickly, he lets it fall back down to the floor. I don’t think my heart can take a break like this.
Sitting up, I pull on his neck with all of my might. “Get up, damnit!” I scream at his closed eyes. “I will never forgive you for this, Achilles! Please!”
The only indication that he’s heard me is the small twitch in his ears.
“Somebody help us!” My strangled pleas ricochet off the walls.
I’m not sure how much time has passed since I came downstairs, but the smoke is getting heavier and my lungs burn. Fire’s breathing down the doorstep of the stall, and I know I can’t leave now, even if I wanted to. The aisleway is completely engulfed in flames. I’d never make it, even if I could bring myself to leave him.
I curl up next to his body, one hand never ceasing the stroking over his neck and sweet face. “Just you and me, Chil. Forget the rest,” I say, repeating the last thing I said to him before we entered the ring in Greece, and hold him tight.
My eyes start to flutter, and I think of him, of Branson, my love. If I die today, I’ll die knowing what it feels like to love and be loved, and that makes all the difference. I was blessed.
“London!”
Bang. Bang. Bang.
“London!”
Willing my eyes open, I cough until I’m certain my lungs will spill out of my mouth.
“Yes?” I croak, looking around wildly but coming up short.
“London!”
Daddy? “I’m here,” I try to yell, but it barely comes out a whisper. After scooping my hand into the last bit of the water, I swallow it, clearing my throat. “I’m here!”
“Are you okay? The doors are chained shut. We can’t get in.” His voice is strained.
Once again, the tears come easily. “I’m fine,” I call through the barn siding. “Daddy, Chil won’t get up. Something’s wrong with him.”
The sounds of multiple raised voices are muffled, but Daddy’s is clear. “We’re going to try to cut through the wall, honey. Is there something you can use to cover yourself up?”
Looking around, I struggle to focus my eyes, but eventually, they land on Achilles’ flea blanket.
“I’ve got a blanket!” I holler back to the wall as I tug it down.
“I need you to keep your back to the outside wall and put that over you, okay, sweet girl?”
I nod to myself before realizing he can’t see me. “Okay.”
After dragging the blanket, I pour what’s left in the water bucket over it. Then I drape it over my shoulders and spread my arms open like wings to cover as much of Achilles as I can.
“Tell me when you’re ready.”
After pressing a soft kiss to Chil’s neck, I call out to Daddy, “I’m ready.”
Something loud rings out—a chainsaw?—and I force my eyes shut as the harsh sound ripples around me.
How long we wait like that, I have no idea. But, eventually, an engine revs before a loud breaking sound, which are followed by a huge rush of cool air. Too scared to move, I stay still, my head resting on Achilles’ body.
“London.” Daddy’s voice envelops me.
He tries to lift me into his arms, but I hold on to my best friend with everything I have. “I can’t.”
“It’s time to let him go, London,” he whispers.
“No, Chil, please!” I cry out as Owen pulls my arms off him. “Don’t leave him here!” I beg them. “I need him.”
The rain splashes onto my face. Then I see that the barn wall is now lying on the ground behind our tractor.
Looking back to where we came from, I watch the smoke swallow him.
Achilles.
MY TRUCK SCREECHES TO A halt behind the flashing lights of the first responder vehicles, the windshield wipers repeatedly blurring and clearing the scene before me like slow torture as the rain beats down on my car. Had you asked me in that moment how I’d driven there, I wouldn’t know. I was already halfway to Willow Bay when the emergency call came in. Something about having left her, despite her demands, hadn’t seemed right, and I’d wished with every fiber of my being that I could go back and stay with her.
Aurora had called, and even though it took me minutes before I could fully understand what she was saying in her panicked state, I knew it was bad. The main barn had caught fire on the South side and London was inside. They only knew that, because the horses were all over the property, and the only person who could have let them out in time was my girl.
I jump out of the truck, not even bothering to shut the door behind me as I scan the crowd. Where is she? The firemen who arrived just in front of me are now setting up their hoses and coordinating with the police on scene. But where is she?
My heart’s never been tethered to another person’s, not like with her. When she bleeds, I bleed. When she aches, I ache. When she’s scared, I can feel it. All the emotions are in my chest as if they are my own in some right.
The rain is only getting heavier, the thunder laying claim to heaven in the sky, and soon, my clothes are completely soaked.
Something loud cracks out into the air, but it’s not by nature’s choice. Picking up into a run, I maneuver my way through the trucks and people. Then a tractor engine revs. I can’t tell if I’m sweating now or if it’s just the rain, but the closer I get, the more I can feel her. Her pain is rippling through the night sky.
When I reach the left side of the barn, my brain can barely register what my eyes are seeing. There’s a huge section of barn wall missing just a few feet from the doors. My heart sinks into my gut when I see what’s wrapped around the handles of the doors. There’s a steel chain, but what makes it deadly is the gold-and-black lock holding it together. The emblem reads: Tucker Farms.
“Don’t leave him here!”
The beat of my heart stills at the sound of her voice, and I frantically search for a visual to confirm. When Larry steps through that hole in the wall with her in his arms, it’s enough to nearly kill me.
She’s wearing my red flannel shirt that she loves so much, but her legs are bare. Smoke has ashen her fair skin, streaks of tears bleeding clean paths down her cheeks as she sobs into her father’s chest.
“I need him.” Her eyes are red and panicked as she looks behind herself.
Following her gaze, I see the faintest image of a horse disappear into the smoke.
Achilles.
I needed to hold her, but that isn’t what she needs right now. She doesn’t need someone to save her. My girl knows how to save herself. So what she needs is someone to save him.
I grab the first fireman I see by the arm. “You listen to me,” I say, tone of my voice insinuating that I won’t have my time wasted. “I don’t care what your priority was before this second, but now, it’s to get that”—I point towards the open wall—“horse out of there. Now.”
“We could save a huge portion of the building,” he argues. “That horse is—”
Pulling him towards me, I lean down to his face. “That horse is everything. You do whatever it takes to save that horse. Fuck the barn. I’ll build a new one. Do you understand me?”
He looks over his shoulder, where another, older fireman has been watching our interaction. The man nods.
“Understood,” says the younger man.