Phin appraised Harry. “Did Alex talk about any old boyfriends?”
“I don’t remember. She didn’t mention her past much.”
“How about her old unit?”
Harry grinned. “Heh heh. You said unit.”
“Focus, Harry. You spent more time with Alex than we did. You have to know her better.”
“If I knew her so well, think I’d have this?”
Harry held up his prosthetic hand. There was a whirring, mechanical sound, and his middle finger raised up. Crude way to make a point, but valid nonetheless. Alex had fooled us all. I met her under false pretenses, and actually considered her a friend up until the point she tried to kill me. She could lie and manipulate better than anyone I’d ever known.
I rubbed my eyes, which stung from all the crying I’d done today. “Okay, we stay put, follow the military angle. I’ll call Herb, see if he can get access to Alex’s rec ords. Maybe we can find someone in her past named Lance.”
Harry shook his head. “Lance is probably dead already. We should head to Deer Park, try to trace the first cell phone in the daisy chain. That’s a sure path to Alex.”
“Can’t we do both?” Phin asked. “Split up?”
Harry rocked himself up off the couch and slapped an arm around Phin’s shoulders.
“Good idea, Phin old buddy. Me and you. Two men on the open road. We can find the phone between marathon sessions of poker and drinking. Hell, with no women around we don’t even have to bother showering or getting dressed.”
“I’m going with Jack.” Phin met my eyes. “If that’s okay.”
I shrugged. “It’s a full night of going over reports, case histories, those shrink sessions while she was at Heathrow. Nothing exciting.”
“Two can read faster than one. And if I’m there, we can keep each other up.”
An unwarranted thought popped into my head, of Phin without his shirt. He had a terrific body. Defined pecs. Six-pack abs…
Focus, Jack, you’re being an asshole. We were chasing a killer, Phin was a crook, and I was still mourning the man I loved. What the hell was up with my hormones lately? PMS?
I calculated when my period was due, and the answer startled me.
Last week. It should have been last week. And I was never late more than a day or two, not once since the age of twelve. I could set my watch by my cycle.
Stress. Could be stress. That’s why I missed it.
Or it could be…
“You guys got a thing for each other?” Harry asked.
“We’re just friends,” I said quickly. Maybe too quickly.
“I hope so, because you’re like twice his age. Besides, women over forty-five shouldn’t have sex. Unless they’re Cher.”
“Ready to go?” I asked Phin, giving McGlade my back.
He put out his hand, helped me up off the couch. His palm was cool, soft, and he held on for longer than necessary. I gently disengaged, and we began to gather up all the stuff we bought at the sports store.
“You sure you want to go with her, Phin? I got a thirty-pack of Old Style in the fridge, and I just downloaded the entire Pink Floyd discography from a file sharing network.”
Phin stared at me, hard. “I’m sure.”
Harry shrugged. “Okay. Your loss. You want me to drop you off somewhere?”
“My truck. It’s parked in a long-term lot on Addison.”
“Gotcha. I’ll be driving, anyone needs me.”
Harry wandered up to the cab of the RV. A moment later Pink Floyd came on, shaking the walls and rattling the windows. I used the knife I’d liberated from Phin’s pool buddy and opened up three plastic blister packages containing walkie-talkies. Then I inserted their batteries and made sure all were on the same frequency.
“I’m leaving you a radio,” I yelled at Harry over “Dark Side of the Moon.”
“What?”
“A radio!”
“Got a CD in already!”
Harry turned up the volume so high it vibrated my tonsils. I shoved the other two radios into a backpack with a portable GPS, two Bushnell rifle scopes, two forty-caliber Beretta semiautos, and several boxes of ammo. Phin was folding clothes. We’d both opted for T-shirts, sweatshirt hoodies, and sweatpants. Nikes and a sports bra for me. Boxer shorts for him. The sporting goods store also carried pan ties, but I figured I could get another day out of the French-cut red pair I had on. It had nothing to do with the fact that none of their pan ties were sexy. Or red. That Phin seemed to like red was completely irrelevant.
The RV jerked to a stop, jarring me off my feet. I reached out my hands to break my fall. Caught Phin. He gave me a look. I needed to nip this thing in the bud.
“Phin, we’ve got a lot of work to do and all this flirting bullshit has to-”
His mouth pressed against mine, cutting off my words. Phin’s lips were firm, insistent, demanding, like I was the most important thing in the entire world and he had to have me. His tongue searched for mine, touched it gently, and I didn’t pull away, instead meeting it with surprising urgency. One of his hands tangled itself in the back of my hair and the other cupped my ass and then my body betrayed me and I hooked my right leg around his and ground into him, a hungry moan escaping my throat.
I wanted his hands on me, his mouth on me, all over. I wanted to stop thinking and stop hating myself and stop being afraid and have him inside me, right away, right now. Was it wrong? Hell yes. When we were finished, I’d add it to the list of reasons I hated myself.
My fingers fumbled with the top button on his jeans, popped it free.
“Bed,” I managed to gasp in the brief second I came up for air. “Harry’s bed.”
But I wasn’t sure we’d make it to the bed. My dress was hiked up, and he already had my bra up, rough fingers teasing my nipple, making me want to do him right there standing up, and then there was a groaning sound and it was coming from me and it wasn’t a happy sound at all.
Phin stopped kissing me. He drew back, a question on his face. My tears were on his cheeks.
I covered my eyes, not wanting to watch him watch me cry. My shoulders shook, and I clenched my teeth to keep the major sobs in, but a few of them got out anyway.
Phin put his arms around me again. There was no urgency this time. Only sympathy. I buried my face in his shoulder, wishing he was Latham, wishing it so bad it made my ears ring.
Or maybe that was the Floyd.
I caught my breath and forced the pain back. Disengaged myself from Phin. Couldn’t look at him. Couldn’t say anything. Pulled down my bra, then busied myself instead with gathering up the remainder of our purchases, feeling his pity like laser sights all over my body.
The music cut off mid-tune and Harry called to us.
“You kids know anyone in a dark sedan? They’ve been following us for five blocks.”
I hurried up to the cab, checked the enormous side-view mirror.
The Feebies. Bastards must have tailed me. Which means they knew I was with Phin. Bad for me. Bad for him. Worst of all for Lance, if I had to spend all night answering questions about aiding and abetting a known felon.
“They’re Feds, Harry. After Phin because he robbed a bank.”
“Good for you, Phin!” Harry called behind him. “Win one for the little guy! You pay for gas next stop!”
I put my hand on Harry’s shoulder.
“We need to lose them, Harry. If they find him with us, we’re screwed.”
Harry snorted. “Lose them? Jackie, we’re driving an RV on a Friday night in one of the most traffic-congested cities in America.”
“You have to try.”
“It’s not gonna happen. He can hide in the refrigerator. I made sure I got one big enough to fit into.”