“You took my girl. There is no mending this bridge,” I got up and injected the drug into his IV.
“Noah. Noah, please no!”
When it was in, I sat back down, “I’ll stay here until the rest of your family shows up. Sadly, you won’t be able to move or speak. You will spend the rest of your life just watching others live. I’ll visit. I promise to keep taking care of your daughter and her mother. But you … this is it.”
“No ...” he trailed off as his mouth opened and closed. However, he didn’t say anything, and as each minute passed, his body relaxed more and more before he stopped moving altogether, the only proof that he was alive being the beeping of the machine right beside me.
“….” I exhaled looking up to the ceiling. It was over.
It was that easy.
And yet it still was painful and ugly.
Hearing the tap on the door, I stood as it opened and a thin woman holding a 9-month-old baby girl in a pink ruffled dress came in, her eyes glued to Bo.
“He’s alive,” I said, moving over to her. Her eyes shifted to mine, surprised. Like she didn’t truly believe I’d be here. I guess that proved Bo’s point that I had left him. Ignoring that, I smiled at his daughter, my hands outstretched. “May I?”
She nodded and her to me. “Her name is—”
“Is Katie, I know,” I replied, bouncing slightly and bringing her round, chubby face close to mine. “Hi, Katie. I’m your Uncle Noah,” she giggled, smacking her hand on my nose, and I kissed her hand.
“What is wrong with him?” her mother whispered behind me, putting her hand on Bo’s head.
“I’m not sure. But I wanted you to know, both of you,” I poked Katie’s cheek again as she smiled, “that no matter what, if and when you need me, I’ll be there. Of course I’ll make sure the house I got for Bo is transferred to your name, along with his allowance. But Megan, this also comes with a warning.”
“A warning?”
Walking back over to her, I placed Katie in her arms. Katie’s hazel eyes never looked away from mine. “If I find out you so much as sniffed bathroom cleaner, I will not just take Katie, but I will destroy you. You’ll never find work in this city or this state again. When I am through with you, you will want to die. Katie’s a Sloan, my brother’s little girl, my niece. If she can’t have both of her parents, she going to have the best damn mother possible. Are we clear?”
Holding on tight to Katie, she nodded. “I won’t. I swear. I’ll watch out for her.”
“That’s all I ask. I’ll be in touch,” I replied, leaving them. When I got to the door, I couldn’t help but turn to look at him one last time.
“I’m sorry. This is the best I can do,” I said to him.
“What? You’ve done so much,” Megan said, looking at me strangely.
Shaking my head, I stepped out, closing the door behind me. Across from me was Daniel, his whole body stiff, as he waited.
“Did you see him?” I asked him, and he nodded, unable to speak.
Saying nothing more, I followed him as we walked toward the elevator. I hated hospitals and the memories they brought with them, always because of Frank. Even as an adult, it was the same feeling.
“Sir, your phone,” Daniel said when we waited for the elevator. I clearly hadn’t even realized I was missing it.
Seeing the caller, I didn’t want to answer. But I did anyway.
“Sloan,” I said into the phone.
“Rest assured, your father will no longer be an issue for either of us,” Liam said. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I’m sure he was smiling.
“Understood.”
“I wasn’t expecting a ‘thank you,’ but you could sound a little jovial? Don’t you think?”
No, I did not think so.
“How?” My thought process felt like it slowed down the moment the elevator arrived, and we stepped on.
“You want details, or how to be—”
“How do you do everything you do and still manage to sit down to enjoy steak and shallots with your wife like nothing ever happened? Better yet, how do I do this?”
He snickered in reply. “And here I thought we were sort of the same.”
That was not comforting.
“To answer your question,” he continued, “make a list.”
“A list?”
“Of everything and everyone that is important to you. Write down your hopes and dreams. And then ask yourself, is this obstacle—whether it is one person, place or thing—worth burning your list over? If not, then you do whatever you gotta do. The world takes what it wants, Noah. If you want to have a heart, fine. But it doesn’t need to be shared with anyone not on that list. Whatever morals everyone else has mean shit the moment the people they love are taken from them. Everyone is ruthless. They just don’t know it until they need to. It is just that simple.”
When he hung up, I did realized he was right. We were similar. I believed the same thing. The only reason why this was so painful was because it was family—I had lost family.
“We are here, sir,” Daniel whispered, but I couldn’t step out. I just stared for the longest time, and when the doors closed again, he held them open until they buzzed, like an alarm reminding me the world waited for no one.
Stepping out, he led the way though he didn’t need to. The signs above us clearly marked where we needed to go.
A man in a lab coat said, “Mr. Sloan—”
Ignoring him, I walked in and Daniel kept him back.
“Austin,” I whispered, knowing full well he wouldn’t be able to reply. He wouldn’t be able to see me. He just laid there, his skin—what wasn’t burnt off—already losing color.
“Austin,” I called his name again, reaching out to take his hand from under the sheet. “Austin,” I repeated. I had so much to say, but his name was all I could manage, as I wept, as I sobbed for a man who wasn’t just my manager, or friend, but who I saw as an older brother. “Aus … tin.”
For more than ten years, he had always been right behind me, and now he was gone. Just gone. It wasn’t like the movies. I didn’t get to tell him thank you. He didn’t get any last words. He was just dead, a body on the table. And it was my fault.
“I’m so … I’m so sorry Austin.” My eyes burned, tears rolling down my face and off my chin right onto him. “Forgive me.” Please forgive me.
“Thank you for everything. Thank you for being my brother and friend when everyone else left. You saved me. Amelia and I will do better. We won’t let all your hard work go to waste. And we’ll never forget the person who made us who we needed to be. I swear. It’s the best I can do.” Wiping my eyes, I put his hand back under the sheet, standing up straight again.
Exhaling, I stepped away from the table and moved back to the door.
My list now was just Amelia.
My dream? The both of us, married, kids of our own, still acting.
It was all possible—after we healed from this.
Amelia
“Are you awake?”
Opening my eyes, I saw him sitting right beside me, brushing my hair back gently.
“Noah ...” I smiled, my eyes focusing on him. “You’re here.”
“Where else would I be?” he asked softly. “How do you feel?”
I didn’t think about it until I tried to move. “Ugh ... sore.”
“Yeah. Just rest—”
“Austin?” I remembered, cutting him off as I became fully alert. “What happened? Austin went back for Esther—we had a plan, my stupid plan, but he’ll explain but—”
“Amelia,” his voice was hard yet barely over a whisper. Taking my hand, he kissed it and shook his head.
“What does that mean?” I stared, trying to pull my hand away. But he held on tighter. “Why are you shaking your head like that?”
“Amelia—”
“Where is Austin?”
He didn’t answer.
“Noah!”
“He died…He died yesterday.”
“What?”
“Amelia—”
“No.” I fought back my tears. “No.”
“Shh,” he whispered, moving to the bed, lifting me into his arms.
“It’s my fault,” I said, holding on to him. “It’s my fault…Noah—”