“I love him,” Gudrun said.
“That isn’t an answer,” her father pointed out. “Do you want to marry him?”
Gudrun closed her eyes for a long moment. She’d often thought that having a policeman for a father wasn’t fair! He’d always been able to pick up on her lies, or half-truths, or when she’d been unwilling or unable to tell him everything. And he’d even told her, more than once, that he met more experienced liars on the streets. He’d certainly had no trouble detecting her own doubts and concerns.
“I don’t know, father,” Gudrun said, honestly. There was no point in trying to lie – or mislead. “I do love him… if things had been different, I would have agreed at once.”
“If things had been different,” her father pointed out, “you would have married Konrad.”
Gudrun winced in pain. “Konrad is dead,” she snapped. “If things had been different… yes, I would have married Konrad. And I would have done my best to be a good wife for him.”
“He would have liked that, I think,” her father said, dryly.
“But right now, I don’t know if I want to marry,” Gudrun admitted. She was too upset to care about what she was saying. “Why can’t we have a relationship without getting married?”
“Because, sooner or later, you will get pregnant,” her father retorted. His voice was surprisingly even, which worried her. “And what will you do then?”
Gudrun cringed. If she could have, she would have jumped out of the window or made herself vanish in a flash of light. Her father… her father couldn’t know what Horst and she had been doing, could he? And yet, he’d been a young man too. Gudrun – and her siblings – were living proof that their parents had slept together at least four times. She didn’t want to think about her parents being intimate, but there was no way to avoid it.
“Marriage exists to ensure that children are raised in a safe and loving home,” her father continued, when she said nothing. “If you are not married when you give birth… people will raise eyebrows.”
It would be worse than that, Gudrun knew. If there had been a strong promise to marry – which had been broken, through no fault of the woman – she might just be regarded as untainted. But if there had been no promise… she knew it would reflect badly on the woman, her parents and everyone else. It didn’t seem fair, somehow, that it was always the woman who suffered for a mutual sin. A man who slept with many girls, outside marriage, would be given a slap on the back by his friends, while everyone scorned the women…
“I do want to marry him,” Gudrun said. “But at the same time, I worry about all of this.”
Her father’s lips twitched. “Your mother has started to move into politics, too.”
Gudrun met his eyes. “What do you think of that?”
“I think it would be unwise to object,” her father said, dryly. He smiled. “One thing you will learn, when you start married life, is that while your husband is always meant to be in charge, you will have a great deal of influence behind the scenes.”
“Unless you get a very bad husband,” Gudrun said.
“Unless you do,” her father agreed.
He leaned forward, resting his hands on her desk. “I approve of Horst,” he said, flatly. “He did… he did a great many things to keep you safe, before and after the uprising. He’s smart, he comes from a good family, he has prospects…”
“So do I,” Gudrun said.
“Yes, now,” her father said.
He cleared his throat. “I have discussed the matter with your mother,” he said, firmly. “We have agreed that we will approve the match, when Horst works up the nerve to ask you. It may take some time.”
Gudrun blinked. “He’s brave…”
“There are many kinds of bravery,” her father said, cutting her off. “Charging into the teeth of enemy fire is one thing, I suppose. Asking a girl to marry you… that’s a very different kind of bravery.”
“He approached you,” Gudrun said.
She shook her head. It was hard not to feel that Horst should have approached her first, even though law and custom demanded that her father be asked for his approval before the girl herself was asked. His refusal would have put an end to the whole affair, unless the happy couple ran off and married secretly… a difficult task, when the law demanded that both sets of parents needed to be present when the marriage took place. She knew girls who had only found out by accident that their parents had rejected a number of prospective suitors. Some of them had been very hurt, but what could they do? They had no recourse if their parents turned down the match.
“That isn’t quite the same,” her father said. “The fear of being rejected by a girl is so much greater.”
He paused. “Give him time to work up the nerve,” he warned. “You don’t want him to feel pressured into it, not when marriage is fraught with emotional hazards. And when he asks… well, you shouldn’t make him wait too long before you say yes.”
“If I do say yes,” Gudrun said.
Her father met her eyes. “Marriage will change your life,” he warned. “If you are not sure that you want to marry him, say so now. I will be quite happy to refuse the suit for you, if that is what you wish.”
“But I don’t want you to refuse the suit,” Gudrun said. “I just don’t know if I want to marry him now.”
“Make up your mind,” her father said. He nodded towards the window as a pair of explosions echoed out in the distance. “You may not have much time left.”
“I know,” Gudrun said. And yet… she sighed. Perhaps she should broach the topic with Horst, rather than waiting for him. “I’ll make up my mind soon.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Berlin, Germany Prime
3 October 1985
“The advance forces are in position,” Sturmbannfuehrer Friedemann Weineck reported, briskly. “Aircraft and gunners are standing by.”
“Order them to open fire in ten minutes,” Alfred ordered. “The advance forces can move forward five minutes after that.”
“Jawohl,” Weineck said.
Alfred nodded, never taking his eyes off the looming city. There were no cracks in the city’s defences, no hidden tunnels that would take the stormtroopers directly into the Reichstag. A handful of tunnels had existed, he knew, but a cursory examination had told him that they’d all been collapsed. The provisional government wouldn’t have missed that trick, not after underground tunnels had been used to move commandoes into Moscow during the war. It was impossible to avoid the simple fact that the only way to break into Berlin was through naked force.
This is going to cost us, he thought. He’d used all of the five days Holliston had allowed him to muster his men and resources, but he still felt as if he needed more time. And yet, Holliston had a point. Germany East had to win the war quickly or she would never win at all. Far too many of my men are going to be killed.
He cursed under his breath. The scouts had reported back, but none of their messages had been very reassuring. There were row after row of defences, ranging from basic trenches to fortified houses. Breaking through one defence line would only expose his men to fire from the next defence line. There was little hope of ramming a spearhead through the defence and then pushing reinforcements into the gap before the enemy could rally and counterattack. It would be disastrous if he tried. There just wasn’t the room to manoeuvre his forces. No, he would have to clear the defence lines one by one in a full-frontal assault. And it was going to cost him dearly.