“You heard us talk. About the Event? How?” Edith grimaces, and her chubby cheeks bubble out. I watch her face redden. Her anger leaves me paralyzed in my place. It’s so imminent I forget I need an answer to my question.
“How are you not in the asylum?” Edith says, as she hurries toward me with the knife, about to stab me.
It takes me a moment to realize that my sister is about to kill me. But it also helps that I don’t really remember her. We don’t have anything in common. No childhood memories. No secrets shared. Not even fights. In the back of my mind, she doesn’t mean anything to me.
I duck, and let Edith swing her knife and slice the thin air atop of me. Then I kick her sideways in the knees. Nonsensical jujitsu style. My fingers tighten together and my hand is straight as a rod.
Edith trips and falls on her face. Her head bangs against the foot of the stairs. She is aching. Cursing me. There is a moment when I want to lend her a hand and apologize, but I don’t do it. She tried to stab me. She tried to freakin’ stab me.
I close my eyes for a fraction of a second and breathe in. This is the first time my None Fu skills actually work. I read in the book that I should be yelling “yeehaa” or something while fighting. They call it an “anchor call.” A word so strong to you that it gives you strength. The only word that strong to me is “Jack.” But I can’t even begin thinking about him, or I’ll start crying. I figure I can do without that word.
With my eyes still closed, I see the book’s pages flap before me. Page 82. Line 12. It reads: “A true None Fu Warrior never take success for granted. If you bring your opponent to the floor, don’t expect them not to come back to life. Finish what you started. Long live None Fu!”
Following the book’s instructions, opening my eyes, I kneel down and hit Edith with the back of my elbow, making sure her curses turn to moans then a hissing snore.
I’m Alice’s cruel and nonsensical world of madness.
I step on Edith’s hand, pull the knife and grip it, then turn to face my other sister. The dizziness strikes again. I don’t know why. It’s as if my mind is ready to daydream or envision something but it’s still too weak to do it. I should have really taken my medication this morning.
I am Alice’s sense of blurring realities!
I have to admit it. I feel insane. And I love it.
Lorina stands casually by the table, sucking on a strawberry. My Barbie sister pretends she is cooler than cool. A sinister smile on her heart-shaped lips gives away her real intentions. “None Fu, eh?” she says. “Where did you learn that?”
“You know about None Fu?” I grimace, waving my knife, eyes on the dress behind her. I don’t know why, but looking at the dress intensifies my dizziness. I look away, for now.
Lorina lifts her chin and chews on the strawberry. “Know about it?” She stretches her arms and knuckles her slim fingers. “I have a black belt in None Fu, little doll.” She suddenly runs across the hall like an acrobat in a circus. She runs backward then somersaults, landing on the couch. She arches her body in some martial arts position, stretching out her hands and calling the fight. “Let’s play.”
My eyes are so wide open they hurt. I can’t believe this is happening.
Knowing the Hatter must be watching me somehow, I dart into the open kitchen and pick up the housemaid’s dress. I wrap it around my waist then check the watch. It’s exactly 11:06 a.m. I’ve done it.
My phone beeps instantly. Another message: Well done. Starting from 12:00 p.m., I will give you 24 more hours to catch the rabbit. That’s if your sister doesn’t kill you first.
I look around for some sort of camera or something. How does the Hatter see all of this?
But I have no time.
Lorina is already in my face. She kick-boxes me so hard my back hits the refrigerator. My head buzzes like a tuning fork. I feel like I want to just faint away from all this madness, sliding against the refrigerator door, down to the floor, deep into an ocean of numbness.
“Lorina one, Alice none!” My None Fu sister sets the score.
Chapter 21
Stop!
Freeze this scene. I need to catch my breath while I am sprawled on the kitchen floor.
In a sane world, I’d just let go and call it a day. Seriously, everything so far has been on the tutti frutti side of the world. Why I am fighting my sister right now isn’t exactly clear to me. Neither do I know what they meant by “what happened to me.” A sane girl would just go away, date a nerdy boy, live in a cute little house, get pregnant, and raise kids later in life.
But a sane girl wouldn’t be locked in an asylum. A sane girl wouldn’t have a companion called Carter Pillar.
I’m not sane.
Even if I am, I don’t think I am—paradox this!
It’s hard to explain.
I’m Alice on the dark side of insanity.
And while the conformity of being stranded in an asylum might be a better option, even that isn’t working out for me. How many more times can I tolerate shock therapy? How many times can I tolerate waking up finding myself crippled?
Whatever this is I am facing, I have no other choice. My insanity is my sanity. I am both, but I am one. If any of this makes sense.
Okay now, roll on again. Unfreeze that scene.
Lorina sneers at me while I am picking myself up. I have no idea how she is such a good None Fu fighter. Where did she learn it?
I arch my body, stretching my hands and legs into another position I have been training for in my cell. It looks silly, like in a badly dubbed seventies Asian movie. But it should work out. I stare Lorina in the eyes.
Ding. Round two!
“Do you even know what this position is called?” Lorina makes fun of my average None Fu skills.
“Zashchishchaiushchikhsya!” I reply. It’s one of the hardest positions—and words—in the book. The term was coined by Lewis Carroll himself when he visited Russia. It turns out Lewis left England but once. Only to go to Russia. He wrote a whole book about his journey and how he fell in love with this particular word, which meant “to be defended” in Russian.
“Can you say Zashchishchaiushchikhsya ten times in a row?” Lorina snickers then raises the back of her hand to hit me.
She moves too fast. I lose balance, feeling my cheek go numb from the power of her swing. I plow against the fruit basket on the kitchen table this time. A banana gets stuck in my open mouth, and strawberries shower me as I fall again. White cream trickling on my cheeks. I am a happy cake.
“Lorina two, Alice none!” Lorina rubs something off her dress. It’s ridiculous how much she is enjoying this.
“Look.” I stand up again. “I don’t need this. I came here to get something. I think I should leave now.”
I’m Alice’s cowardly conscience and subconscious, trying to save the world.
“You’re not going anywhere,” she exclaims. “Before I put you back in the asylum, where you belong.”
“I’m you sister, Lorina,” I say. “Why would you want to do this to me? Please.”
“You shouldn’t have left the asylum.” She lashes out her other hand at me.
This time, I’ve had it.
I don’t duck, but face her instead. I crisscross my hand with hers as if they are swords, and then pull the pan from the table and swoosh it across her pretty face.
“If you don’t shut up, I will omelet your pretty Barbie face.” I don’t even know where these words come from.
Lorina glares in disbelief. I have the feeling she needs to check her face in the mirror, but I don’t wait that long before I swoosh her face with the pan in the other direction.