“Oh man. What rotten timing.” Hailey cringed. “Want me to run interference?”
“Nah. That’s not fair to you. But thanks for asking.” Sydney had long ago resolved herself to loving but not liking her mother. She could never forgive Isabel Fields for putting her last, and oddly enough, she was okay with that. Especially since her mother had never asked for forgiveness.
Every year or so, Isabel would show up, need some Mommy-time—which equated to showing off how terrific she looked. No one ever believed Isabel had a thirty-year-old daughter. They looked more like sisters. The woman was a knockout, and she used her looks to her advantage.
Sydney tolerated her visits, mostly because she felt duty-bound to see her mother. Isabel hadn’t been abusive; she had provided Sydney with the essentials during her younger years. Besides, Isabel never stayed long, not if she had a man in her life. The woman clung to men like ivy to crumbling brick. Once the relationship died, as they always did, she reseeded herself and found a new man to leech off of.
Hailey popped her in the arm.
“Hey!”
“Stop ignoring me. Listen. I know you don’t believe me, but Derrick’s different than the other guys you’ve dated. Not just because he’s Gage’s brother. He’s a genuine person. Sure, his track record with women is spotty, but it’s a mirror image of yours with men.”
“And now she insults me.”
“Well, it’s true. You look at every guy you date like he’s one of your past uncles. Not only is that creepy, but none of the guys ever made you happy.” Hailey stared at her with those big eyes. “You’re not your mother, Sydney. And it’s time you realized that.”
Sydney sat up straight. “You think that’s what I’ve been doing all these years? Thinking I’m her?”
“Aren’t you? Unlike her, you don’t try to convince yourself you love any of them. You just use them for sex. But not one guy you’ve ever dated has been what I’d call nice.”
“Maybe I like bad boys.” Derrick definitely had a naughty side to him. Or at least, he used to have one.
“Can you honestly tell me you’ve ever liked anyone you’ve dated?”
“Sure. There was—”
“That you slept with,” Hailey clarified.
To her mortification, Sydney couldn’t. Not until Derrick, except he wasn’t sleeping with her anymore. Her eyes filled. “Oh my God. I’m exactly like her. I’m Isabel Fields!” Her worst fear come true.
Hailey rushed to her side and hugged her. “Stop it. You are not.”
“But Hailey, I’m a user. I’m terrible.” She hadn’t meant to treat her boyfriends like crap. But so many of them had deserved it. Maybe because she’d intentionally picked assholes?
“You’re not a user, you’re not your mother—God forbid—and you’re growing out of it.”
“Growing how? My ass? My thighs? What? Where? You think I’m gaining weight?” she joked, trying to stop feeling sorry for herself.
Hailey snorted with laughter. “You’re the vainest woman I know. Would you shut up a minute? You’re not fat. Come to think of it, you feel thinner to me.”
She groaned. “I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I think about that jerk all the time.”
“Who?”
“Derrick, Hailey. Focus, would you?”
“Oh, right. I didn’t realize he was such a jerk.”
More tears threatened to fall. “He won’t have sex with me. He’s a complete jerk…except he’s not. That’s what’s so awful. I made all these rules he’s actually following. We’re not supposed to date, and we aren’t. We were just supposed to get the sex out of the way. And I guess we did, but I still want him all the time. So we don’t have sex, and we hang out. And I…”
“Yeah?”
“I like him.” She burst into tears.
Gage chose that moment to step into the room. He took one look at them on the couch, turned around and left.
“God. N-now I’m man-repellent,” Sydney stuttered through her tears. “I’m an idiot. I don’t even know why I’m crying. But I feel so emotional lately. I think I connect with Derrick, and I’m so afraid one day he’ll just stop coming around. But I’m also afraid he might stay. Does that make sense, or am I totally crazy?”
Hailey nodded. “Oh honey. I sometimes feel the same way. It’s hard to put yourself out there. You just have to live it day in and day out. Trust yourself, then trust him.”
“Him?” She didn’t want to say his name, to admit she was in danger of falling in love with one of the Warren twins. Oh my God! She was falling hard for Derrick Warren with no way to stop.
“Don’t be an idiot. We’re talking about the man you’ve fallen in love with.”
Sydney felt the truth like a slap in the face when Hailey said the words. Not falling for. Fallen for. For three months she’d talked to him, falling slowly under his spell. He was sexy, had a great sense of humor, and came from a family that showed each other how much they cared. Then the sex had been perfect. Not just great, not just wow, but incredibly right. They fit each other, and he was the most unselfish lover she’d ever been with.
A man that made sure she came before he did? Unheard of. But the last two weeks had worn her down. She counted the minutes until they saw one another. The hint of a dark SUV like his made her heart jump. Receiving text messages from him thrilled her. Beck’s Loser had become her favorite friggin’ song.
“I hate the way I feel, all needy and lovesick,” she admitted in a quiet voice.
Hailey stroked her hair. “I know. It sucks. But look at it this way. I bet he feels the same way.”
The thought amused her, and then she felt a measure of inspiration. “You think?”
“Yep.” She glanced around again. “I’m not supposed to say anything, but I know he’s having a hard time knowing what to do with you. He even consulted his mom about you, because he was frantic to get you to talk to him. Hell, he used me too.”
“He did, didn’t he?” The knowledge that he’d gone crazy when she wouldn’t talk to him softened her up even more.
“Sydney, you’re the most confident woman I know. If you want a stable relationship with anyone, Derrick or any other guy, take back control. When I finally realized how I felt about Gage, you told me to believe in myself. Well, back at you, girlfriend. Do you think you can have a meaningful relationship with a man? Or are you just like your mother?”
“I don’t want to be like her. Most of the time, I don’t even like her. I’m a terrible person, aren’t I?”
“Not at all. I don’t like her much either. But you didn’t answer the question. Are you just like your mother? Would you ignore a friend or daughter for a man?”
“Hell no.”
“Not even for Derrick?”
If there was a man she might cling to, it was him. And yet, she’d never leave Hailey hurting or needing her just to make Derrick happy. “Not even for him.”
“Have you ever followed a man around because he’s your sugar daddy? Or do you make a comfortable living on your own? Do you have friends? Are you selfish? Are you on your sixth marriage?”
“No, no, no and no. Wait, how many questions did you ask?” She shared a teary grin with Hailey. “You always make me feel better. Well, you do when it’s not before noon.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “So okay. If I want to try being a real person dating a real man, what do I do?”
Hailey shrugged. “Wake him up. Shake him up. That’s what I’d do if Gage hadn’t made love to me in a few weeks. The one time I wore this really sexy outfit, he went out of his mind.”
Sydney nodded. “I actually have a few ideas. Can I borrow that French maid costume you wore to last year’s Halloween party?”