He woke with a start to the smell of fresh coffee and the chink of china. The duvet had been carefully tucked around him and he looked at the clock on the bedside table, then relaxed — it was only five. There was plenty of time to take a shower, get dressed and go back to his place to change into fresh clothes. He didn’t look much like a division commander as he joined Lorraine in the kitchen, swathed in a sheet, and she looked up and smiled shyly, indicating the coffee. He liked the fact that she was wearing only a towel, and that her face was devoid of make-up, her cheeks rosy. He went to her and put his arms around her, kissing her neck.
‘Good morning.’
He felt something thump against his bare foot, and looked down to see Tiger wagging his tail. ‘Morning to you.’ He scratched the dog’s ear. ‘Does he always sleep in your bed?’
‘I’m afraid so. I’ve tried to kick him out, but he creeps back in during the night. He’s pretty good — I mean he doesn’t take up too much space, he knows which bit’s his.’
She fetched cups, and cream from the fridge.
Jake washed his hands at the sink, and she was surprised to see him pick up the empty takeaway containers and put them in the trash, then collect the empty cans and all the cartons that were still half full.
‘He had a feast in the night,’ she said, nodding at Tiger. A few noodles were scattered on the carpet, and she picked them up before she tidied the coffee table and carried the dirty ashtray to the bin.
‘You should give that up,’ Jake said, as he ran water into the sink.
‘Yeah, I know.’ She liked standing close to him, liked him being in her tiny kitchen — liked everything about him. She slipped her arm around his waist. ‘You want some toast?’
They sat at either end of the sofa, Lorraine with her legs curled under her, eating thick slices of toast with blueberry jam and drinking a mug of coffee. ‘What time do you have to go to the station?’ she asked.
‘Nine, which means...’ He looked at the clock. ‘I’ll have to leave in an hour or so, unless you want me to go now.’
‘No.’ She leaned towards him, and he reached out with one finger and traced her lips. Their eyes met, and she put down her mug and crawled along the sofa until she was able to rest against him. ‘You feel good,’ she said softly. She eased around to sit between his legs, and he passed her her coffee. As she reached up to take the cup, the sleeve of her robe fell back, revealing the scars on her arm again.
‘You were in the wars at one time,’ he said gently, kissing her.
‘Yeah, I was.’ She felt her stomach tighten, and his hand massaged the nape of her neck. ‘You should know, you read my sheet.’ She began to slide away from him, murmuring she wanted more coffee, but she lit a cigarette, and was angry to see her hand shaking. ‘Suppose you want to know how much I charge, these days.’ It came out tougher than she had meant it to sound.
‘Don’t be so defensive,’ he said lightly, then laughed. ‘Besides, the takeaway cleaned me out of cash.’
‘Yeah, well, I was pretty cheap — price of a drink.’
‘Stop it,’ he said firmly, watching her fall apart in front of him, her hands shaking as she sucked at her cigarette, her whole body tense with anger.
‘You started it,’ she snapped, and he raised his arms.
‘All I said was—’
She stood in front of him, shoving her arm under his nose, showing him the old scars and cigarette burns. ‘You missed these.’
He reached out and gripped her wrists tightly. ‘No, I didn’t. Like I said, I read your sheet, I know all about your self-mutilation, kind of goes with drugs, booze and...’
Lorraine tried to twist free of him, but he got to his feet, refusing to let go of her, then suddenly pinched her cheek, staring into her face. ‘Your mug-shot’s not up to date — where’s the scar on your cheek, Mrs Page?’
Now she wrestled free of him and glared. ‘I told you — plastic surgery. Gimme time and I’ll get round to all the others. Now, why don’t you get out of here and leave me alone?’
‘Why don’t you simmer down?’
She walked towards the bedroom. ‘I’ve got things to do. You know the way out.’
He moved fast enough to reach the bedroom door before her, and dragged her inside, pushing her down on the bed.
‘What’s this? Gonna try some rough stuff on me now, are you? That on my report sheet, is it?’
He slapped her face, and she took it, laughing at him. He stepped back. ‘I’m sorry... sorry.’
‘Don’t be, I’m used to it, I can take it. Come on, you want it again, take it.’
She opened the towel, lying naked in front of him, and he bent forward. For a moment she thought he was going to punch her, but instead he pulled the sheet from under her, so that she rolled sideways, then wrapped her inside it. Her arms were trapped and he held her so that she couldn’t move. ‘Don’t do this, Lorraine...’
‘Give me one good reason.’ She pushed her face close to his, and then the look of hurt in his eyes made her anger evaporate. She couldn’t keep up the act, and she rested against him again, a low sob shaking her body.
‘Sssh,’ he said softly, rocking her in his arms.
‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean what I said. I’m sorry, it’s just... It’s just ...’ She couldn’t continue.
‘Just what?’ he asked, after a long pause.
‘Just that I am scared.’
‘Not of me?’
She shook her head, then bit her lip and nodded. ‘Yeah. I am scared of you, or of what you make me feel.’
‘What’s that?’
She sighed. ‘Oh, please, don’t do this.’
‘Okay. What if I tell you that I am... I’m only interested in this woman I’ve got in my arms right now. I don’t give a fuck about her past, what she did or didn’t do. I’m not dumb enough to think it won’t come up, or that we won’t have to talk about it, but for no other reason than I want to know you, all of you, the good, the bad...’
‘And the ugly,’ Lorraine said, her eyes filled with tears.
‘Sure, yeah, all of it. Anything to do with you I want to know about.’
She didn’t know what to say to him, she just felt like weeping.
‘You’re supposed to say that you want to know everything there is to know about me,’ he said, feeling her begin to relax in his arms.
They made love again, then showered together. Afterwards Lorraine made fresh coffee while Jake scrambled some eggs, and they ate breakfast again side by side on the sofa.
Will you get the autopsy report on Cindy Nathan today?’ she asked, trying to sound nonchalant.
Jake slipped on his jacket. ‘Yes, well, it was supposed to come in today.’ He crossed to her and leaned on the alcove. ‘I think we might have a little talk to Mrs Kendall Nathan this morning too.’
Lorraine nodded. ‘Yeah,’ she said, pretending a keen interest. ‘I’d check her out.’ She looked at the clock. ‘I should get dressed.’ There was an awkward pause, while Jake hesitated a moment, then walked to the door. She didn’t want him to go, but if he had no intention of seeing her again, she didn’t want him to stay either. ‘I’ll see you,’ she said, hurrying towards her bedroom.
‘Okay. ‘Bye, Tiger, look after her for me.’ He opened the door, and was half-way through it when he turned round. ‘I’ll be off at about four — you want to take in a movie? ‘
She felt like a kid, knew she was blushing. ‘Yep, I’d like that.’