“I’m sorry,” she whispered, not meeting his eyes.
“No, Emily, I—”
“Please, Gavin, just leave. I need you to leave,” she sniffed, still unable to look at his face.
The air prickled uneasily between them for a long moment. Gavin desperately tried to get his tongue unglued from the roof of his mouth and tried to say something—anything—that would fix the situation, but he couldn’t. The words—the right words—didn’t exist in his mind.
And this he knew.
Running a nervous hand through his hair, he turned away, reached for the door, and reluctantly made his way out.
Emily trembled as she hunched over in an attempt to catch her breath. She closed her eyes, desperately trying to block out the guilt, push it away, and purge it out of her system. Her complexion was drained of all color; her eyes were bloodshot and puffy from crying. Her stomach was curled around itself in disgust—not only from what she had just done, but also from the feeling that somewhere in the back of her mind…she knew it had felt right. God, it had felt so right kissing him, touching him, and letting him touch her. She buried her face in her hands and cried as the fresh waves of guilt crashed through every limb in her body.
Feeling mentally drained by it all, she walked over and collapsed herself onto the couch, trying to regain her composure as she wiped the tears from her face. A part of her felt like it was dying as vivid pictures of Dillon kissing Monica skirted through her head. Staring at the ceiling, Emily wondered if somehow she had deluded herself into thinking Dillon wasn’t cheating on her. Her instincts sent sparks throughout her mind from the past several weeks, but her gut wretched against listening to the warning sirens going off.
A sharp knock at the door roused her from the nightmare she had hoped she was awakening from. Before she could answer, the door swung open. Dillon was standing in the hall with her bags. Swallowing down the rising bile in her throat, she could feel the pulse in her stomach when she shot up from the couch. Closing the door behind him, his eyes met and locked with hers from across the room.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, her eyes glaring at him. “I want you to leave.”
“You have to let me explain.”
“Let you explain? You kissed her!” she scoffed, her eyes bulging.
“She kissed me,” he corrected.
“Bullshit! I want you out,” she yelled and pointed toward the door.
“You’re going to let me explain.” He walked across the room, bridging the distance between them.
“You kissed her,” she cried, stabbing her finger into his chest. “I saw it with my own eyes!”
He grabbed her by the wrist and moved closer. “What you saw was her leaning in to kiss me. You didn’t see me push her away, Emily,” he breathed out, his voice low and steady.
“And I’m supposed to believe that?” she nearly screamed. “You lied to me about her being Gavin’s girlfriend!”
She made a beeline toward the kitchen, but he grabbed her by the shoulders. “I didn’t tell you about her that night because I didn’t want you feeling uncomfortable while she was there.”
She immediately jerked back and openly gaped at him.
“I’m not kidding, Emily. I didn’t want you to know she was someone I used to date. I knew if you found out that night, you’d want to leave. I figured it was no big deal,” he said, stepping closer.
She moved back, almost stumbling.
“Baby, I’m not lying,” he continued. “She’s fucking obsessed with me. You think I would do that with her out in the open, knowing you were there?”
Emily glared at him, her mouth wide open.
He raked his hands through his hair. “I didn’t mean it like that. I was coming out of the bathroom, and she asked if she could talk to me for a minute. I agreed, and before I knew it, she pulled me into her and kissed me. That’s what you saw, babe. I swear to fucking God I pushed her away. You must’ve turned around before I did.”
Shaking her head, Emily’s hand rushed to her mouth as she began to cry. Hurt ricocheted through her heart—the pain literally slamming through her body. Could she have made an assumption too soon from the few seconds of their kiss that she saw? She had never felt so confused.
“I even warned her when she got to the party to stay away from me and you,” he whispered, cautiously stepping closer and bringing his hand up to caress her cheek.
Continuing to cry, she averted her gaze to the floor, not knowing what to do or what to say.
“I just gave Gavin hell for bringing you back here without my permission.”
Emily’s head snapped up. “You…saw him?” she asked, swallowing hard.
“Yes, I saw him leaving out front,” he replied, burying his face in her neck. “You shouldn’t have left with him, Emily.”
She pulled back again, her green eyes wide. “You don’t think you would’ve left if you had seen me doing the same thing?”
“I’m not sure,” he paused, nibbling his bottom lip as if deliberating what to say. “I just know that I don’t like that he brought you home without telling me and that you actually left with him.”
Her features morphed at the shock of his words. “You’re mad at me for leaving, Dillon?”
“Jesus, baby, I’m not mad at you.” He stepped closer and brushed his hand across her neck. “I just want you to believe me. She means nothing to me.” Stepping closer still, he breathed against her cheek as his hands smoothed down to her waist. “I pulled away, Emily. I swear I did. You just didn’t see it.” He gently moved his mouth over her lips, his voice pleading as he kissed her. “I love you more than anything in this world. I would never hurt you, babe. Please, you have to believe me. I fucking love you.”
He tilted her head back, angled her body to his, and slid his mouth down her neck.
“Dillon, please,” she moaned, grabbing onto his shirt. “God, please, Dillon, don’t lie to me,” she begged as tears ran down her face.
“Baby, I’m not lying.” He trailed his hands under her dress and slipped it over her head. “I fucking love you, Emily. You’re my world. I can’t lose you,” he whispered into her mouth, his breath ragged against hers. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”
Her own indiscretions with Gavin tore through her as she looked into Dillon’s brown eyes, oxygen seeming to evaporate from her lungs. The guilt thrusted itself like an ice-laden spear through her heart.
“Tell me you believe me,” he breathed out heavily, slowly kneeling as he swirled his tongue in hypnotizing circles down her stomach. He then slid her panties past her thighs. “Tell me you believe me, baby.”
She felt so torn over what she wanted to believe and what she had done with Gavin. “Yes, I believe you,” she cried. “I’m so sorry, Dillon. I’m so sorry.”
Before she knew it, he ripped the panties from her body, pulled her up off the ground, and carried her to her bed. He spread her legs, holding her in place, as his tongue laved against her painfully pleasurable spot. Her body writhed against his mouth and moved of its own accord while he gripped onto her hips, sucking, licking, and tasting her very essence.
Her muscles convulsed with both ecstasy and guilt as his fingers slid in and out of her hot warmth. Needing to rid herself of the shame she felt and wanting him inside her at that very moment, she strained up.
“Dillon, I want you now,” she moaned, sliding herself back against the pillows.
He shed the rest of his clothing, climbed into the bed, and sank himself inside her. She gripped his caging biceps, throwing her head back at the sensation of him pulsing into her hot flesh. He slammed his mouth over hers and stifled her moans as she closed her eyes. And then it happened—the visions of Gavin kissing her, the feel of his velvet tongue, the warm touch of his fingertips all over her body—her every thought was consumed by him. Dillon was on top of her, but all she could feel, touch, smell, and taste was Gavin.