“I think that’s terrific,” Ben commented, addressing Porter. “Have you enlisted yet?”
Porter shook his head and set down his knife beside his plate. I knew no one wanted to mention the events that led to him considering joining the service. After high school he floundered a bit, going out too often, and went through about every girl in this town and the next while he waited for our sweet neighborhood girl, Eden, to grow up a bit and notice him. When that didn’t happen, he’d gone on a bender and gotten arrested for drunk driving one night. My parents had recently given him an ultimatum: Grow up and do something with your life, or get out. We’d yet to see what he’d actually do.
“So, Ben, do you have other aspirations besides modeling?” my dad asked. I couldn’t help but see the comparison being made in my dad’s head. Porter was doing something admirable in serving his country, and Ben’s job was all about glitz and glamour.
“Well, it’s not a career that usually carries you through retirement,” Ben said. “One of the things I’d like to do, with Emmy’s help,” his eyes found mine, “is to set up a charity to eventually run.”
His desire to run a charity was news to me but I immediately liked the idea. Of course I would help him. I grinned widely and his mouth quirked up.
We ate until we were stuffed, and then somehow managed room for the pumpkin and apple pies my mom and I had baked.
Ben and my dad had seemed to really hit it off. After dinner they sat in the living room talking for hours, my dad pulling out his atlas so Ben could show him on the map exactly where he lived and I lived in the city. I knew my living so far away made my father nervous, but somehow seeing that I had a capable man in my life had brought my father around to the idea of Ben.
Soon it was time for us to leave to catch our flight back to New York, and through a tearful good-bye between me and my mom, Ben promised my mother he would bring me back for another visit soon.
15
Emmy
Back in New York, Ben and I huddled close as we left the airport. The temperature was in stark contrast to the mild autumn air back home. I pulled my navy pea coat around my chest and burrowed into the scarf looped around my neck.
Ben guided me toward the waiting black sedan at the curb.
Henry.
It was nice not having to hail a cab. Especially since I’d never mastered the talent, despite being a New Yorker now. At this rate I wouldn’t have to. Being part of Ben’s life was amazing. Chauffeured car service, flying first class to cities around the globe, room service, and plenty of sex. I had a feeling once reality set in with dirty dishes, piles of laundry, and all the other annoyances of real life, I’d be in for a rude awakening. But for now I was living the dream.
Ben’s knuckles rapped against the trunk as Henry popped it open and hopped out of the car to assist. I slid into the backseat and let them fight over putting the bags in the back. A quick glance in the rearview mirror told me Ben won, maneuvering both our bags inside and refusing Henry’s help. We hadn’t discussed where we were heading but I gave Henry my address and then dared a glance at Ben. His face was impassive. Good. At least I wasn’t being scolded for wanting to go home.
We drove along the Grand Central Parkway, the sun glistening off the river below and warming my cheeks. Even if New York didn’t quite feel like home, it was nice to be back. I’d been living out of a suitcase for far too long between Fiji and Tennessee. Plus I missed Ellie. I missed her like crazy.
As we stopped in front of my building, Ben exited the car to retrieve my suitcase, and to my surprise, guided me up the stairs. “Are you staying?” I asked. I figured he’d be as eager to get home as I was.
“For a bit, if that’s okay. There’s something we need to discuss.”
I nodded and rescued my keys from the bottom of my purse before letting us inside.
Ellie was sprawled across the couch, blankets strewn around her prone body and a tub of ice cream sitting on her chest. “Argh . . .” She pulled the spoon from her mouth and sat up abruptly.
“Hi.” I waved. Damn, I really needed to learn to give her a warning knock or something. She looked like hell. Baggy, stained sweatshirt and hair in a messy bun. “Everything okay?” I asked. It wasn’t even noon and she was hitting the peanut butter fudge ice cream pretty hard.
“Men fucking suck,” she announced.
“All of them or someone in particular?”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m going to my room.”
Okay then. I’d talk to her once Ben was gone, figure out what in the world had happened. She hadn’t been dating anyone when we’d left for Fiji.
Ben carried my suitcase into my bedroom and I trailed behind him. After depositing the bag on the floor at the end of my bed, he turned to face me. “There’s something we need to discuss.” He ran a hand down my spine, stopping at my hip to pull me close. He bent down to brush his mouth against the side of my head.
Flutters of heat shot up my spine, coloring my neck. “What?”
“There’s something I want,” he continued.
I’d give him anything. But the intense stare he was directing my way was intimidating. “W-What do you want?”
“Move in with me.”
Whoa. What? I thought we’d covered this. “Ben.”
“I hate when I have to take you home and leave you behind. I want you with me every night. I want to wake up with you every morning.”
“Be serious. We haven’t been dating very long.”
“I am being serious, Emmy. Why not?”
He didn’t know all my disgusting habits. And I didn’t want to know his. I needed my own space, my own bathroom time, for heaven’s sake. “Don’t you want your space?”
He stepped closer, his eyes locking on mine. “No. I want you in my space. You’re mine. I hate the thought of leaving you here.”
“You just need a warm body next to you to sleep.”
His mouth twitched in a smile. “There is that. But not just any warm body.” His hands curled around my waist. “This body.” Sliding his hands lower, he caressed my hips lightly. “This tempting, sexy body,” he whispered near my ear, sending chill bumps racing down my spine. “Plus we should live together for a while before we make things official, right?”
Did he mean . . .? No, I couldn’t be distracted right now, though. I had to tend to Ellie. I’d been a horrible roommate and a worse friend the past several weeks. Removing his hands from sinking any lower, I took a step back. My head was a mess. He was standing in my tiny bedroom telling me he was committed to this—to us—and wanted to share an address with me. “I need to talk to Ellie. Can I call you later?”
His mouth tightened into a line and his eyes settled on mine. Shit. He’d been vulnerable with me, opened up and explained his need to keep me close and his fear of rejection. And here I was, ready to reject his proposal. I took his hand in mine and squeezed. “Actually, I could come over later if you like. I just need to make sure Ellie’s okay.”
His mouth relaxed and he leaned down to kiss my forehead. “I’ll send Henry back in a few hours.”
“Okay.” I wondered if I’d ever ride the subway again. Not if Ben had his way. I’d be chauffeured around the city like a kept woman. But I’d address that later. I didn’t want to refuse his generosity. We did, however, need to have a talk about boundaries and maintaining my freedoms at some point soon.
After seeing Ben out and locking the door at his insistence, I sought out Ellie, tapping lightly on her bedroom door. “Ells?”