He crossed his arms on his chest but didn’t for a millisecond release my eyes as he whispered, “Baby, just you wait and see.”
“Oo, exciting,” I whispered back sarcastically.
“You bet your ass,” he returned.
“Are we done?” I asked then carried on. “See, something else to learn about me, when I’m done, I’m usually done and either he goes or I do. Since we’re both staying I’m still ready to go. So are you through with me?”
“Not even close.”
“Good news,” I retorted. “But just to be clear, I’m up for seconds. You seemed pissed. Angry sex works for me but I’m guessing you’re beyond that. So, what I’m asking is, for now, you through with me?”
“Yeah,” he jerked up his chin. “For now.”
“Best get supplied, baby,” I warned. “That was just a teaser. I get in the mood, I can go all night. The emergency condom in your wallet isn’t gonna cut it.”
“Drugstore just got scratched on our itinerary for tomorrow. First stop.”
“Works for me.”
“Right. You done bein’ a bullshit badass?” he asked.
I shrugged. “Sure.”
“Good. But don’t lose the bullshit smartass. She makes me hard.”
“I’ll keep her at the ready.”
“You know the beauty of this?” he asked cuttingly.
“No, handsome, tell me,” I invited mockingly sweet.
“This was exactly how your father and stepmother talked when they weren’t fighting. Remember? You told me all about it.”
His aim was true.
Right through the heart.
“I see,” I whispered. “We’re not fighting fair.”
“Nope,” he confirmed and made his point by lifting a hand and touching the tips of his fingers to my mark on his neck. He dropped his hand and went on, “All’s fair. No rules. No holds barred. Winner takes all.”
My shoulders straightened, I wrapped my arms around my belly and I kept my eyes locked to his when I said softly, “Six years, Creed, six years, every day, every minute, every second, I lost whole pieces of me. After I got loose, I made certain I don’t ever lose. Not fucking ever. You just entered a game you cannot win.”
“You got loose, you get any of that back?” he asked.
“Not that first fuckin’ piece.”
“So you’re tellin’ me my Sylvie is gone.”
His Sylvie.
Motherfucking asshole.
“Long gone,” I verified.
“Right,” he muttered like he didn’t believe me.
“Right,” I repeated firmly.
“So who was that who smiled big at that Down’s kid this morning like he started her day and touched her forehead to his making him look like she started his?”
No way I was going to let him get to me.
“That was Adam’s Sylvie.”
“You ran across the yard like you’d just received a bomb threat, baby, not like you were five minutes late to help your girl. You don’t miss a day even if you have to haul your ass over there hungover. You dropped a job when Josh got sick and your dead partner’s wife had to work so you could look after him. She doesn’t know it but it’s you that puts red and white roses with a blue ribbon on his grave every fuckin’ Sunday. And you took me on just so you could take Knight’s back. That wasn’t Adam’s Sylvie. It’s not Charlene’s Sylvie. It’s not even Knight’s Sylvie. It’s just plain Sylvie. The one I knew. She’s not gone. She’s standing right in front of me.”
“You hold onto that, Creed, you’re gonna get fucked.”
“Jesus, I hope so.”
I clamped my mouth shut.
Then I unclamped it to declare, “I feel the need to get drunk. We’ll pick this up tomorrow.”
“You need a ride home from the bar, you just call me,” he invited.
“Handsome, you’ll never hear from me. To get down to your name in my phone, I’ve got two whole letters.”
It was his turn to clamp his mouth shut.
I took that as my cue to go.
So I did.
I stopped in order to glare at Gun who was curled up in the seat of a dining room chair fast asleep. My glare was for her being in the mood to nap and thus deserting me in my hour of need. However, since she was snoozing, she missed my glare. Still, it made me feel better.
I also stopped to yank on another pair of socks and boots and grab my keys.
But me, my jeans, tank, boots and socks, commando and braless, walked right out the door and, like we had many, many times before, we took on the night.
Chapter Six
The Best Birthday Ever
A sunny, summer by a lake in Kentucky, twenty-seven years earlier, Creed is twelve, Sylvie is seven. It’s her birthday…
I peddled my bike quick over the trail in the trees to get to the lake.
I didn’t want to miss him.
We didn’t get to do this a lot. It was hard to get away from Daddy but when he was at work, my stepmom was usually drinking that clear stuff straight from the bottle, so it wasn’t hard to get away from her. I just had to be careful and Tuck told me we couldn’t be greedy. Greedy was stupid. The more chances we took, the more chances we took on getting caught.
So we only did it special.
Like today.
My birthday.
This didn’t count the nights. Tuck said I could come anytime at night, I just had to be careful.
So I did.
Whenever the words came, me and Bootsie would sneak out of the house and go to Tuck’s. I’d knock on the window and, always, my knuckles would barely hit the glass before it flew up. Sometimes, he’d stick his head out and tell me he’d meet me in the woods. If his Mom was gone, he’d stick the whole top of his body out the window, grab me under my arms and pull me in. Then he’d go back out, hanging almost all the way out so every time he did it I was scared he’d fall but he never did, and he did this so he could grab Bootsie and bring her in with us.
In the woods or in his bedroom, we’d talk and even though he was a whole lot older than me, we always had tons of stuff to talk about. What we liked to eat. TV programs we liked to watch. Movies we’d seen. Folks in town. He’d talk about his Dad. I’d talk about my Mom and my visits with her when she’d come get me and take me to Lexington for her weekends with me.
If we spent time in the woods or in his bedroom, no matter what, he’d walk me home to the back gate of the fence around my backyard.
The lake came into view and I saw him, his tanned bare back to me, sitting on the end of the pier and just like always, seeing him made my belly feel funny. The kind of funny it felt right before you got on a ride at the carnival or amusement park. That kind of funny.
I stopped my bike by his, jumped off, grabbed the stuff in my basket and laid my bike on its side in the grass.
Then I raced down the path to the pier, jumped up on it and raced down the wood planks.
Tuck turned and watched me, his lips curled up.
I stopped at the end and my, “Hi!” sounded breathy.
“Hi,” Tuck replied.
I shoved the frozen Snickers bars at him. “Brought ‘em!” I cried and then flipped off my shoes and sat down beside him at the end of the pier.
His legs were dangling down, so long, his feet were covered in water up past his ankles. My legs were so short I had to point my toes for the water to skim the tips.
He took a Snickers bar and started to rip it open.
I ripped open mine and bit hard into the frozen caramel and nougat.
“I couldn’t make a picnic. She was in the kitchen,” I told him through Snickers bar.
“That’s okay, Sylvie,” he told me through a mouth full of his.
“But she’s, you know…” I didn’t tell him what he knew and kept talking. “So she’s out of it. We can swim and do it for a long time. Daddy’s away on business and she’ll probably be sleeping when I get home so we can spend all day here if we want.”