The young woman paused again, her eyes growing a little unfocused. "It's hard to figure yet, but… I don't think you understand-not sure any of us do-just what an impact this is going to have on the Manticoran public. Especially the Liberals. And there are a lot of Liberals in the Star Kingdom, Thandi. Forget New Kiev and that crowd, I'm talking about the rank and filers, the average voter. The ones who're starting to gravitate toward-"
She pointed a dramatic finger at Berry. "Her mother. Goddamit, Thandi, think about it! New Kiev's been dragging the Liberals through mud for years. Now-suddenly-something bright and sharp and clean comes along. A cause. The kind of cause any Liberal-and plenty of other people, too-can get excited about." She was almost cackling, now. "I wouldn't be surprised to see volunteers start showing up on Congo. That's happened before in history, you know, plenty of times. And some of them will have military experience. Not to mention that High Ridge's policies have left plenty of officers on the beach-good ones, too. Some of them will come too, just from being bored if nothing else."
"That's assuming the truce between Manticore and Haven lasts. If war breaks out again, forget it."
"So? In that case, the pressure on either star nation to out-influence the other on Congo just increases. Either way, Thandi, there are so many angles you've got to be able to play one of them."
She shook her head. "But all that's something of a side issue, because the main reason Berry needs you as the head of her armed forces has nothing do with foreign affairs. She needs somebody she can trust. And whatever else you might or might not be capable of, the one thing Berry won't have to worry about is that you'll carry out a coup d'état."
Thandi grunted. "Why should she assume that?" She gave Berry as hard a look as she could manage. Which… was not easy, meeting those open, limpid young eyes. "I'm ambitious, girls. That's why I left Ndebele-whored myself to do it, when I had to. That's why I jumped at the chance to join Rozsak's staff, even though… Well, let's just say that not every assignment the captain's given me tastes all that good. But I swallow it anyway. And I'll do it again."
But, even as she spoke the words, she could feel the harshness in her tone fading away. Till, at the end, there was nothing left except…
A very bad taste. Not the taste left by any specific act or deed in her past, but simply the sour, acrid taste of ambition itself. It came to Thandi Palane, with something of a jolt, that she really didn't like ambition. She'd latched onto it simply as a tool to escape her past-and, since then, because she had no idea what else to do with her life.
She was still staring into Berry's eyes. The tears in those eyes were gone, now. All that was left was that clear gaze which Thandi realized-with the same jolt-she would miss desperately once it was gone.
"I got curious once," Berry said softly, "so I did a little research of my own. Names on Ndebele usually mean something, I found out. Yours does. 'Thandi' means 'I love this girl.' "
Thandi swallowed, remembering a father-briefly, before he died-who'd been drunk most of the time, but had never been cruel to her. And who'd always tried, when he could, to give her presents on her birthday. And a mother… tired, beaten down, who had just seemed to finally fade away.
"Just a romantic moment," she rasped. "It didn't last, I assure you."
"You don't believe that, Thandi, any more than I do. There was a time of hope. Not just a moment. That it didn't last is no excuse for surrendering hope itself. Only cowards do that, and you're no coward."
Thandi tried to look away, but couldn't. Berry's calm eyes seemed to have her fixed. Before the girl's next sentence was even spoken, Thandi knew what it would be-and that it would pin her like a butterfly.
"I love this woman. And I want her-no one else-to be my shield and my sword arm, and my boon companion."
Thandi's own eyes were watery. "I'll have to think about it."
"Sure," said Berry, smiling like a cherub.
"I'll need to talk to some people," Thandi added. "Victor. And… I've got to talk to the captain, too. I owe him that much. He should be arriving today, back from Smoking Frog. And Jeremy. And Professor Du Havel."
"Sure," echoed Ruth, smiling like Machiavelli.
Her conversation with Victor on the subject was brief. He heard what she had to say. Then replied, very softly:
"You'll have to decide for yourself, Thandi. Frankly, I wouldn't trust my own advice, if I were you. The reason is probably obvious."
She swallowed, and nodded. It was obvious to her, also. Victor Cachat, whatever else might change about him, would always remain a partisan and a fighter for his own people. A Havenite, through and through. If Thandi gave her allegiance to the new star nation being born… a scrupulously neutral nation, except for its war with Mesa…
Whatever else, Victor and I would never find ourselves on opposite sides. And-I could keep seeing him!
She tried to suppress the sheer joy that thought gave her. Her life had trained her to be cold-blooded, after all. Even if she was sick and tired of it-as much as she was of ambition.
Still…
"Would you come and visit me?"
"Every chance I got," he said huskily. "I love this woman, too."
Her discussion with Jeremy X and Web Du Havel was lengthier, but not much. That also took place in her own compartment. This time, with Thandi perched on the bed, Du Havel sitting on the chair she'd occupied earlier, and Jeremy lounging easily against the door.
"I'd insist on incorporating my Amazons into the new army," she stated, as soon as the preliminaries were over. Firmly, almost harshly. "As well as any other former Scrags-or anybody else-who emigrates and wants to enlist. And not in their own separate unit, either. Take it or leave it. That condition is nonnegotiable. Assuming I decide to agree."
Jeremy shrugged. "No argument."
"From me, either," said Du Havel. "In fact, I support the idea. It'll cause us plenty of rough moments, of course, integration always does. But…" He eyed the very large and imposing woman sitting across from him, and smiled. "On the other hand, I dare say you'll manage to handle the disciplinary problems involved."
"You'll need someone else in charge of naval forces. I'm not trained for that. Wouldn't even know where to start."
"I'll check with Anton Zilwicki," said Jeremy. "I know he's been training at least three Ballroom people. One of them could probably do it-on the scale we're talking about, anyway." He paused for a moment, frowning, then shrugged. "I could be wrong, too. But if he doesn't have one of our people he thinks is ready now, he and Cathy certainly have the contacts to find us someone who's up for the job. And who we can trust. It's not as if our new 'navy' is going to amount to much, anyway, so we should certainly have the time to grow our own officer corps from within, I'd think. Privateers, in all but name-and that's not going to change all that fast. Warships-real ones-are fiendishly expensive, and we're going to start off the way freed slaves always do. Flat broke."
"It might change faster than you think," demurred Du Havel. "I've been studying the economic figures available for Congo, as many as I've been able to track down. Which isn't much-and that's significant in itself, because it means it's been a gold mine for Mesa and they're keeping it hidden. That planet is potentially rich, Jeremy. The market for pharmaceutical products isn't going to go away. And I don't believe for one minute that Mesa's brutal methods for extracting the wealth are necessary. They just use up people because it's easy for them, and it's their way of doing business. Give us a few years-fewer than you think-and we can start producing more wealth using civilized methods than Mesa ever did with whips and chains. We'll be able to afford warships, be sure of it. Enough to match Mesa, anyway."