"You're not likely to, Sunny," Lars said kindly."They both turned off storm warnings once too often."
"Oh!"She paused, considering that information."Then how can Donalla lean on them?"
Lars had stowed their two duffels; he strapped himself into his seat, motioning for Killa to do the same, as he prepared to drive back to the cube.
"Regression," he replied succinctly.
That was the word.
"What's that?"
"It's an old technique of accessing segments of memories lost on purpose or from brain injury.We don't use but two-fifths of the brains we've got.As Donalla explained, some functions can be switched to unused portions of the mind, and often memories get shunted out of active recall.Off and on, there have been fads of regression, usually to former lives."He chuckled before continuing, an indication of his opinion of such an exercise."We're using it to tap memory strings.Donalla's research on memory loss suggests that we don't actually lose anything we've seen, heard, and felt.The unpleasant we tend to bury as deep as possible, depending on its effect on our psyches.Oddly enough, good memories get dropped just as thoroughly.Through a careful use of hypnosis, Donalla has been able to reclaim lost knowledge."
"That's illegal."Lars shook his head at her outburst."Isn't it?"
"No, it isn't.I had that point clarified.We are custodians of those husks of former singers, and they get the best physical care we can supply.Some of them, under Donalla's care, have actually been restored as functioning humans."
Killa stared at him, aghast."You can't possibly put them back in the Ranges!"
Lars laughed harshly."I'm not sadistic, Killa, it's a plus to me if they are able to care for themselves.Some have improved enough to undertake simple duties in the Infirmary."
"That's macabre, Lars," Killa said with a shudder.
"It's also expedient.The infirmary is damned near full, and I won't short anyone on the care they need if they've totaled their minds.The other problem is that the Guild is not attracting enough new recruits to make up for those losses…"
She felt both anger at him and a stirring of terror.She'd come all too close to being one of the "totals" herself "If I'd totaled, would you…"
His eyes on the ground speeding past them, Lars reached out to grab her hand."If you were totaled, Killa, you wouldn't be aware of anything that was happening to you."
"But would you subject me to…?"She couldn't continue, horrified at the very idea of someone crawling about her mind without permission, at that ultimate loss of privacy.The painful grip of his fingers increased, jolting her out of such considerations.
"I told you I didn't want to be Guild Master.Lanzecki left me with quite a mess to cope with, only, when I agreed, I didn't know the half of it.Full disclosure wasn't required of him."Lars's smile was droll."But I did have some ideas on how to revitalize the Guild, to reorganize it for efficiency and predictability.I can't leave so much to the vagaries of the singers and the weather."
"Vagaries?" she repeated indignantly."Vagaries?"His choice of word infuriated her.
"Yes, singers are permitted far too much leeway-"
"Too much?When we risk our sanity every time we go into the Ranges?"
"That's the most haphazard part of the whole operation," Lars said scornfully."Most singers-and you are not in that category, Sunny, so relax and listen up-cut just enough to get off-planet.They leave viable sites long before they need to quit because of an approaching storm.They don't remember from one time to the next where they've profitably cut and waste a lot of time trying to locate old ones or find new ones.This paranoia that keeps a singer from noting coordinates of claims is absurd.It's easy enough to use codes."
"If you can remember it later," Killa put in.
"Numbers aren't that hard to remember," he said, "and something has to be done to make such invaluable information available to the individual.It'd cut out the guesswork and make every trip into the Ranges far more profitable.Our friend Terasolli's another example of wasted time.He gets top price to set that octave, and he won't come back to Ballybran until crystal itch drives him back.That'll be a year or so-a year or so of unproductivity.That's got to stop."
"Stop?"She sputtered the word in her amazement at his uncompromising attitude.
"Two, maybe three months, should be respite enough for a singer."
"How the fardles would you know?"Killa demanded."You've never set black crystal.You don't know…" She tried to stop, she was trembling so badly."Set this thing down.I'm not going any further with you.I'd rather walk back to the Guild than stay another minute…"
Lars did set the vehicle down, but he also shoved in the door lock and swung his back against it so she couldn't reach it.His face was set and his eyes flashing with anger.He took her by the shoulders.
"You'll stay and you'll listen!If I can persuade a mind as closed as yours against any change in wasteful habits and stupid archaic perks, maybe I have a chance of pulling the Guild out of the hole it's in."He gave her a little shake, his fingers digging into the flesh of her upper arms.He ignored her squirming."I'm trying my damnedest to save this Guild.Its position in communications is no longer as secure as it used to be because people have got tired of waiting for Ballybran crystals and have developed alternatives.Not as good as our crystal but performing much the same functions and… always… available… for replacement…" He spaced the last words for emphasis."I've got nine orders for black crystal I cannot fill because my singers cannot relocate the sites where they've found black.So they go wandering about in the Ranges, looking, trying to remember.I want them to remember.I've been patient long enough-just as Lanzecki was patient-but there's an end to patience and I've reached it.I'll do anything I can to supply black crystal, to build up a backlog of the stuff, to reinstate the Guild to its former prominence.And if it means I have to plumb the depths of crazed minds to find out where black crystal is, I will.But it'd be much easier to have a live singer willing, and able, to cooperate with me."
His bitter gaze held hers, and she could see his deep anxiety, his frustration, his fears in the dark agony of his clouded eyes.His voice was harsh with desperation.
"How could I cooperate any more than I have?" she asked in a low voice, shivering internally with fear of what this compliance might do to her.
"Oh, Sunny…" He embraced her tightly, holding her head under his chin with one hand, stroking her body as if contact would express his gratitude and relief.Then he held her slightly away, her face in his hands, stroking her cheeks with gentle thumbs, looking deep into her eyes."You know where you cut blacks.It's there in your memory."One hand cupped her head tenderly."We just have to access those memories… it'll all come back.Donalla says that with the proper clues, you could remember everything…"
Killashandra stiffened, regretting her impulse, pulling herself free."I don't need to remember everything, Lars.I don't want to remember everything.Get that straight now."
"Honey, all I'm asking is landmarks for the black-crystal sites you've cut.I've remembered only two and I know there were more.I have got to have black crystal," and he pounded his fist into the plas above the control panel with such force that it left a dent.
She reached for his hand, to prevent him repeating the blow.Immediately he covered hers with both of his.
"If we could only"-and his voice was low now, his frustration vented-"get singers to note down landmarks so they can get themselves back to the best sites…"