For me this was alien and exotic. I had grown up where almost no one drank or at least was ever visibly the worse for wear. There was a neighbour who drank himself silly once or twice every six months, this was a sensation and caused quite a stir. There was an old alcoholic who cycled to the shop every day to buy his brown bottles of beer. And that was it. Mum and dad never drank, apart from a couple of bottles of beer or a glass of red wine with their food. Grandma and grandad in Sørbøvåg didn’t drink, grandma and grandad in Kristiansand didn’t drink, none of my uncles and aunts drank, and if they did, never in front of me. It was only two and a half years ago that I had seen my father drunk for the first time.
Why didn’t they drink? Why didn’t everyone drink? Alcohol makes everything big, it is a wind blowing through your consciousness, it is crashing waves and swaying forests, and the light it transmits gilds everything you see, even the ugliest and most revolting person is rendered attractive in some way, it is as if all objections and all judgement are cast aside in a wide sweep of the hand, in an act of supreme generosity, here everything, and I do mean everything, is beautiful.
Why say no to this?
I plunged into the party on this March evening, I was in my element, I even went over to Richard, who was sitting in a late 1970s suit a size too small for him, with his wife, to say how much I liked him, he had kept a tight rein on me, he was right to do so, and everything had gone well, hadn’t it? It was going well, wasn’t it?
Yes, I was doing fine.
He didn’t like me, but he couldn’t say that, all he could do was force a goatish smile. I was in the ascendancy, I was the shining star, he was just the head teacher at a small school, of course I could spare a moment for a cosy chat with him.
I saw Vivian and Andrea’s mothers, they were friends and were sitting at a table smoking, I sat down beside them, I wanted to have a chat about their daughters, they had such fantastic girls, they were so lively and pretty and would do well in life, I was sure of that.
I had never spoken to them before, apart from at parents’ evenings, but those had been formal occasions, I had discussed the girls’ performance and behaviour in various subjects then, they had listened carefully to what I said and asked a few questions, no doubt prepared, before disappearing into the darkness, on their way home to their children, who had been nervously waiting to hear what the meeting might bring, or reveal. Now the situation was different, we each had a glass in front of us, people were staggering past on all sides, the music was loud, the air close and warm, I was drunk and so eager to say something nice that I was leaning over the table towards them with a huge smile on my face. They said their children talked so much about me, there was no end to it, in fact it was almost as though they were in love with me! They laughed, I said yes, that can be difficult, a teacher who is only eighteen years old, nevertheless they are incredibly nice girls!
For a moment I wondered whether to ask one of them to dance, but rejected the idea, they were at least thirty-five, so even though they had a twinkle in their eyes when I appeared, I got up and wandered around the room, sat down first here and then there, went outside and saw Håfjord gleaming beneath me, the black sea straight ahead, and when I went back in I searched for Nils Erik to say what a good friend he was and how much I liked sharing the house with him.
Having done that, I went outside again, I wanted to take in the view one more time. At the bottom of the hill were my girls, I went down, Vivian was with Steve, Andrea with Hildegunn, I asked them if they were enjoying themselves, they were, and they laughed at me, perhaps because I was drunk, who knows, but it made no difference, I moved on, into the thick smoke-filled atmosphere, bounded up the steps in two strides, ploughed my way into the room, and there in front of me, like a revelation, stood a girl.
I stopped in my tracks.
Everything in me stopped. She was beautiful, but there were many who were, that wasn’t the point, it was the eyes she looked at me with, they were dark and brim-full with a life I wanted to share. I had never seen her before. But she was from here. She came from the village, I could see that the moment I clapped my eyes on her, for she was wearing football kit, the whole deal, shirt, shorts, socks and boots, everyone who was working there tonight was, the event had been organised by the football team, and would anyone not from the area volunteer to work at a party for Håfjord Football Club?
She was holding a tray of empty glasses.
Seeing her, so beautiful and so shapely, in football strip and boots, made my senses reel. I glanced at her bare thighs and calves, and I knew I was doing it, so to disguise this fact I looked slightly to one side, and then the other, as though I was inspecting this clubhouse and everything in it very thoroughly.
‘Hi,’ she said with a smile.
‘Hi,’ I said. ‘Who are you? I’ve never seen you before, I’m sure of that, you’re so beautiful I would have remembered if I had.’
‘My name’s Ine.’
‘You live here, but you never go out, is that right?’
‘No.’ She laughed. ‘I live in Finnsnes, but this is where I come from.’
‘I live here,’ I said.
‘I know,’ she said. ‘You work with my sister.’
‘Do I? Who’s that?’
‘Hege.’
‘Are you Hege’s sister? Why didn’t she say she had such a pretty little sister? Because you are younger than her, aren’t you?’
‘Yes. Yes, why didn’t she tell you? Perhaps she wants to protect me?’
‘From me? I’m the most harmless person out here.’
‘Yes, I’m sure you are. But I have to go in with this. I’m working here tonight, as you can see.’
‘Yes,’ I said. ‘But can we meet again? When you finish? There must be some get-together afterwards somewhere. Why don’t you come along? Then we can chat a bit more.’
‘Well, we’ll have to see,’ she said, turned and made for the little room beside the stage, where the kitchen was.
After that, the party was over as far as I was concerned. Nothing going on there interested me any more. All I had in my head was the beautiful waitress dressed in football kit, and I spent the rest of the evening looking longingly at her.
Hege’s sister!
She told me everything, why hadn’t she told me about her?
I searched for Nils Erik and said we should organise some drinks at home. He hesitated, he was already exhausted, but I was determined, we were going to do this. As long as he didn’t have to join in it was fine by him, he said. You have to stay up for a bit, I said. And you don’t need to invite anyone else. What are you up to? he said. Have you got your beady eye on someone? You bet, I said, filling my glass to keep myself on the boil while doing what I could to kill time. I caught fleeting glimpses of her as she went in and out of the kitchen, for a while she served in the snack bar as well, but I didn’t go over, although I would have loved to buy a hot dog from her, just to watch her squeezing the ketchup and mustard from the plastic bottles over the sausage, but I didn’t want to waste the little time I had on anything that wasn’t to do with my plan for her and me at our place. I didn’t want to be a nuisance or force myself on her. When she smiled at me I said there would be drinks at our place afterwards, we were staying in the yellow house on the bend and it would be an enormous boost for everyone there if she came along.