"Don't worry, we're going to make sure he never gets his hands on you again," Rome said.
Alison's gut tightened. A throbbing pain was beating at her temples like it was trying to get out. She just wanted to be alone. She didn't want to think about Conlin or Sandra or her life or anything at all.
Sarina caught her gaze from across the room and gave her a soft nod. "Baby, are we done here? I'm feeling tired." Instantly the male looked concerned. Vane grabbed her hand and practically hauled her to the door.
Rome laughed and Vera snorted and rolled her eyes; Darien just stared at Vane and his mate, a peculiar look in his eye.
Rome hollered before everyone was out of earshot. "If anyone gets news of any kind you pick up the phone and call me."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Roman. We know the drill." Vera lifted off from the chair, the move fluid and graceful. She swooped down and gave Alison a quick, startling hug before heading to the front door. The male Jacks didn't move as she stared at him. They stayed in that staring contest for a few more seconds before she finally puffed out a sigh and sauntered out of the cabin. Jacks gave a nod to Rome and left after the fuming female.
Alison breathed a deep sigh when everyone was gone. Rome came up and leaned down over her, his hands braced on the arms of the seat. Her heart beat faster. Only he could do that to her. It scared the shit out of her.
He cocked his head at her, studying her, taking everything in. From the frown of her mouth to the stressed furrow of her brow and her now rapid pulse beating against the thin skin of her neck. Yup, she was definitely stupid.
She'd been hurt so bad once. It wasn't the physical pain of the beating that Conlin gave her that scarred her. It ran much deeper than that. It festered and bled inside her. She'd actually loved him. The sickness in her gut permeated throughout her body making her body feel heavy and sick. Who could love someone like that? Why couldn’t she see it then?
"Hey, stop it." His voice wasn't gentle. It was hard and heated. He cupped her chin in his hand and gave her a bruising, punishing kiss. "Don't think about it, don't think about him. He doesn't deserve to be in your thoughts." His words surprised her and brought her back from the sick feeling. It was still there but it was only simmering inside her.
Stupid, stupid, that's what she was. She'd made the mistake of loving someone like him before and look where that had ended up.
Life had a cruel way of circling in on her.
"Tell me what's wrong." It was a command spoken from an Alpha. She was helpless to answer it. He gave her another punishing kiss before she could breathe again.
"I'm afraid of trusting you. Even though I know you're different, you're not him. I can't help it. The fear is there, no matter how irrational it is. I'm terrified that one of these days I'll make you mad and then..." her quick words trembled unevenly until finally she tore her face free of his hands and brushed past him. He moved out of the way, letting her escape. Only after she was in the kitchen could she breathe freely again.
He followed her, his intoxicating scent filling the room. She wanted to roll around in it, lick his naked body everywhere. He'd let her too, but then when she came out of her sexual haze the fear would be back. The fucking insecurities. She hated it. She hated herself. So fucking weak. Somehow those angry thoughts fueled her, had her turning towards him, and saying something she'd never expected to say.
"More than anything else I'm scared that after all this is over, I'll be just like Sandra. Bitter and angry...sad that you're gone from my life. That I was temporary to you. Just the girl you spent two months with. "
He took a step forward, but stopped when she held her palm out to him. "You are not temporary to me."
She let out a harsh, semi-hysterical laugh. "Oh really Rome? And just what did you plan on doing with me after we have enough evidence to give to the Justicars? What were you going to 'date' me? Come and pick me up at whatever apartment I can afford."
She could see that her words had struck a chord . He tensed, his eyes sparkling like a roaring fire. A hard knot of pain formed in her chest, making it hard to breathe. The look spoke clearly, as if he'd written it down and shown it to her— he hadn't thought ahead with her. Not at all.
Before he could see the wetness in her eyes, she turned and busied herself with making tea. Through shear will, she managed to erect a wall around her, mostly around her heart. She had to, or she didn't know what would happen.
She heard his words from behind her, but they sounded muted like he was speaking through a filter. She wanted to tune him out all the way but a part of her craved to know what he'd say.
"I'm not a planner, Alison. I'm sorry for that. But I'm not sorry for being with you. I might not have a plan but I did have expectations. Expectations that you'd stay here with me, that we had something good here. I hope I'm not wrong." And with those numbing words he left, the cabin door shutting quietly behind him.
Chapter 13
The past two days were the longest ones of her life. When Rome finally came back that first night, it was late. He didn't say a word to her. He kept downstairs and slept on the couch. Seeing him so angry with her tore like bullets through her heart. Each moment of silence from him, of not seeing his smile ate at her like a virus.
She came to him yesterday night, found him in his study, and apologized. She'd meant the whispered words, they came from deep in her heart. He hadn't even looked at her, just nodded, and said okay. She'd left with tears in her eyes. It wasn't until she reached the shower that she let them fall. She wept quietly, her arms wrapped around her.
She couldn't even fault him for his crude attitude. Not really. Not when she’d been pushing him away this whole time. And not when she tried to ask him for some kind of commitment.
Even though a part of her didn’t understand his reaction towards her, on the outside level, she did. When she had questioned his feelings toward her, their relationship, she had questioned his honor. Lykaen men prided themselves on their duty and honor, especially towards women.
Once again, she wished she'd just kept her mouth shut. If she hadn't said anything, everything would be fine again. For two days, she had time to wallow in her thoughts, her feelings. He came and went, but ignored her attempts at conversation and intimacy. And yet during his silence she had realized something else. He would not be so angry if he didn't care. For two years, she'd lived alone and scared. Scared Conlin would decide to come after her again, scared to date other men. But her lykaen had felt inside of Rome and it told her he was safe. He was welcome.
She had apologized, that only left her bereft and in pain, so now she knew what she had to do. In the kitchen, she dressed the table with a flowing white cloth and set two place settings with a large and small plate, a bowl, and in the middle placed a thick maroon candle from the bathroom. When she'd called Sarina to ask her about what had happened between her and Rome, her friend was more than understanding. And more than eager to help. So she'd read a grocery list of items off to Sarina and a guard had them bought and brought to her within two hours.
Checking on the bread and dinner, she made sure everything was perfect. It had to be perfect for tonight. She might be crazy but she was ready to take a chance...on him.
She ran upstairs and jumped into the shower. She washed quickly, not sure when he was going to be back. She was just pulling on that empire waist black dress that Sarina lent her when she heard the cabin door below open. He was here.
Nerves driving her moves, she slipped on the black heels with shaking hands. Checking on her reflection one last time she made her way down the stairs. Maybe her heels weren't such a good idea after all. They clicked loudly, screaming her presence to the whole cabin. She found him at the entrance to the kitchen, his back ramrod straight.