Gabriel. Break that power, and we may save the Truce. Curane is using blood magic to defeat the Margolan army. If Jared's bastard takes the throne, he's sure to resume hunting our kind, as his father did. This may be the salvation of our people as well as the Winter Kingdoms. May the Dark Lady guide you."
Temis gave a deep bow in respect and slipped from the room. Riqua stared after him before turning to the others. "Now, we wait."
The night was far spent by the time they were finished. Carina was exhausted, but the fear of sleeping and the terror of her dreams forced her awake. Riqua and Lisette had already sought their day crypts. Royster dozed in a chair by the fire in the parlor. Carina stood near the window, protected from the first light of dawn by heavy curtains.
If I believed Jonmarc would return, I'd have a reason to care more whether or not I survived.
But he's sworn the Bargain. We'll be together. One way or another.
Taru stepped up behind her, laying a hand on her shoulder. Carina knew that Taru could feel the tightness in her neck and that Taru's healing magic could easily read her tension. "I don't think healing is what you're after, is it?"
Carina swallowed hard and shook her head. Tears refused to come. "Too many people have died, Taru. We thought that if we took back Margolan's throne from Jared that it would stop, but it didn't. From what I've glimpsed in the Flow, the war's not going well for Tris. How could it, when magic won't work properly? Now Malesh, breaking the Truce. He wants a war because he thinks the vayash moru will win. And Jonmarc-"
"I've never believed that mortals can bargain with the Lady," Taru said.
"But I've seen men make the Bargain, when Cam and I were with the mercs. They never came back." Carina's voice was just above a whisper.
"Men can accomplish the impossible when they no longer care about their own safety," Taru observed. "Many efforts fail because our desire to survive makes us falter at the last moment. If we no longer want to live, and desire only death with meaning, the unthinkable becomes possible."
"Are you talking to me, or about Jonmarc?" "What do you think?"
Carina sighed. "I don't know anymore. Maybe you're right. Maybe it wasn't the Lady who gave those soldiers their victory. Maybe they were able to kill their enemies because they weren't afraid of death anymore, and they didn't come back because they didn't want to. But Jonmarc knows that destroying Malesh destroys me. He's lost so much. If it comes to that- will he choose to come back?
"I can feel myself dying, Taru. I can feel the magics at war inside me, burning each other out-like this damned war in Margolan, or the war over the Truce. No one wins if everyone is dead."
"Did you tell Jonmarc about the bond?"
Carina was silent for a moment. Far beyond the mountains, a faint pink haze lit the winter sky. "After a fashion." "After a fashion?"
"Did I tell him that over time, healers become bonded to our mates? That we weaken and die when we lose a lifemate? Not in so many words. I think he suspects. It was his idea for us to make a ritual wedding. He knows what happened with Ric. Does he know the bond is one-sided? That it only affects the healer? No." She shook her head. "It's too much in his nature to put himself where the danger is. I didn't want him to be afraid of risking me. It would cost him his edge, and he needs that." She paused. "I didn't tell him because I wanted him, Taru. I've never loved anyone the way I love him, Lady forgive me, not even Ric."
She turned away. "Goddess, we've made a mess of things! Even if you're right, even if Istra's Bargain is just a soldiers' legend, I'm afraid Jonmarc doesn't care about living through this fight. He's got a score to settle, and no reason to believe that I'll survive." She faced Taru, knowing that the mage could see the struggle in her face. "There's one chance of something good coming out of this. If I can heal the Flow, that gives Tris a fighting chance in Margolan, and it might make Malesh vulnerable. If Jared's bastard gains the throne, the kingdoms could be at war for a generation. And if Malesh destroys the Truce, the mortals and the vayash moru will keep on fighting until they destroy each other." Carina met her eyes. "If I can't survive this war, then at least I can play my part." "We don't know what will happen if Tris can anchor you. No one's ever done that before. The Flow is the source for all our power. Even healers. It needs your healing, but it may be able to offer you something in return. There is a chance it could help you heal." Carina looked away. The Flow might heal the damage Malesh did to me. But unless we figure this out before Jonmarc kills Malesh, it doesn't matter. Malesh's death will kill me anyhow. I don't know whether Jonmarc and I have been together long enough for the bond between us to affect me. But if it does, and he dies destroying Malesh, then I'll die, too. Worse was the alternative, that she might survive without Jonmarc. "That's what I'm afraid of."
Chapter Nine
"I don't think this is a good idea, Kiara." Cerise folded her arms across her chest. "Scrying drains you at the best of times."
"Carroway told me that scrying didn't go so well for you on the road," Macaria put in. "Are you sure it's safe?"
Kiara thumped her fist against the tall back of a chair in frustration. "Things are different now. Arontala was hunting us then. He used the scrying ball to find us, followed my magic back to find me."
"Arontala and the Obsidian King may be gone, but Curane still has dark mages. You must be careful."
"Just a glimpse. Please help me do this. I have to see how Tris is doing."
Cerise sighed. "I know that tone in your voice. It hasn't changed since you were a little girl.
You're going to do this, whether we like it or not. Very well then. I'll help."
Alle and Macaria nodded their assent. Kiara withdrew a light blue scrying ball from deep
within a trunk and set it carefully in its holder on the table.
"That's Viata's ball. I'd know the color anywhere."
Kiara nodded. "I brought it from Isencroft. Mine was. lost. on the journey." Cerise fixed Kiara with a glare that made it clear the healer was skeptical about the circumstances under which the last scrying ball disappeared. "Viata never could scry well on her own, but she had some gifted seers who helped her watch over your father whenever he left on campaign." "Then why discourage me from trying?"
Cerise looked away. "What the ball shows us isn't always true. The future is always changing. We might see what has been-or what might be, but never with certainty what is. Viata learned that the hard way. One night, when Donelan had been on campaign for a long time against the Western raiders, Viata scryed for him. She saw images from a battle, and saw Donelan hit in the chest by an arrow. It was just a few seconds, but long enough to see him fall from his horse." Cerise's voice shook. "Viata was inconsolable. Nothing Malae or I could say helped. In her grief, she almost threw herself from the window." A sad smile crossed Cerise's face. "Goddess forgive me-but if I hadn't brought her to her knees with a blinding headache, we might not have been able to keep her safe. She was as fine a warrior in the Eastmark ways as you are, my dear." "And father?"