"That's right." He snapped his fingers. "How could I forget? But I do go to balls on occasion. I suppose if you're to remain close to me, you'll have to masquerade as a footman." His gaze wandered to her breasts. "No, the encumbrances to that plan are too… sizable. Oh, well, I'm sure you'll think of something."
He was joking, she realized incredulously. After the tumult and intensity, it took her off guard. "That's not amusing."
"I'm devastated you don't appreciate my wit. It is a bit crude for the taste of most women of my acquaintance, but you're not like them."
She felt an odd pang. No, she would never be like the women of Jared's world. She would never have the gentleness or meekness. She would never have the grace or sweet ways.
"What's wrong?" His smile had faded as his gaze searched her face.
"Nothing." She didn't look at him. "I wouldn't want to be like your fine ladies, but I'm not crude. I would bring no shame to myself in your grand ballrooms."
"Christ, I didn't say you were- Look at me."
"I don't want to look at you."
He reached out and grasped her chin and turned her face toward him. "Now I truly have hurt you."
She shook her head.
"Listen to me. You're not crude. You have courage and an honesty that I've never seen in any other woman." He added gruffly, "You're also impulsive, hot-tempered, and the most obstinate chit I've ever encountered. I might want to strangle you, but I'd never be ashamed of you."
He meant it. He was staring directly into her eyes and she couldn't look away. She was drifting, drowning, floating away from every mooring she had ever known. Dangerous. Dear God, how dangerous. She tore her gaze away from him. "I have to go," she whispered.
Something changed in his expression. His hand dropped away from her chin. "Yes."
She hadn't wanted him to agree with her, she realized at once. She had wanted him to keep her, make her stay. More dangerous than she had imagined. She slipped from the bed.
"How is Kapu?" he asked.
"Nervous. Some days are better than others." She found her sarong and wrapped it around her hips. "I'll be glad to get him ashore."
"Are you still sleeping in the cargo hold?"
"When the sea's at all rough." A memory suddenly came back to her. "You once said you have a horse better than Kapu."
"My mare runs like the wind. She's won any number of purses for me."
"A mare?" She shook her head. "No mare could match Kapu."
"You told me that I shouldn't judge a horse by glancing at him, and yet you're guilty of that trespass. You haven't even seen Morgana."
"That's different."
One corner of his lips lifted. "Because it threatens your beloved stallion. Shall I tell you how I got Morgana? She came almost as far from England as your Kapu."
Curiosity suddenly sparked. "Did she? Where? I thought-" What was she doing? Conversation led to intimacy, and that was forbidden to her. "I don't care where you got her."
He smiled. "Ah, how easy it is to fall into the pit of curiosity. I sympathize completely. I want to ask you a hundred questions, but that's forbidden, isn't it?"
"Yes." She ignored the taunt and opened the door. She didn't look at him as she asked, "Are you going to insist on coming to my cabin tomorrow night?"
He went still. "I told you what would happen if you came to me in that sarong."
"I don't want-" She would not plead with him. "Oh, do what you wish."
"That's my intention." He paused and then shrugged. "But as it happens, I prefer you to come here."
She felt a rush of relief. "I'll still wear what-"
"You've made your choice of wardrobe eminently clear," he interrupted. "Good night."
"Good night." She left the cabin.
He had been terribly angry. Why had he spared her? Kindness? She didn't want him to show her kindness or understanding. Either one rendered vulnerable the barriers she had lifted against him. Yet tonight he had shown her both. She had not dreamed defiance and conflict could lead to revelation and bonding.
It would be all right. The barriers still held firm.
She must just make sure not to draw any closer to him.
Ku'aihelani.
Floating, blissfully drifting, sunlight…
She must not say it out loud. He must not know.
She moved closer and whispered, "There were no sailors on deck tonight."
He kissed her temple. "Yes, there were. Just not on this side of the ship. I told them I'd throw them overboard if I caught them within view of this cabin."
That he had made sure he had his way even while giving her victory was characteristic of him. "Unreasonable," she answered him softly. "They've already seen-"
His lips covered hers. "Shut up," he said roughly when he lifted his head. He parted her thighs and moved between them. "They won't see you again. No one will."
"If I choose, they will. You cannot-"
He entered her again with one deep thrust. "They won't." His hips lifted and fell as he started that wild, pagan rhythm. "Dammit, is this the only way I can keep you from arguing?"
Argue? She couldn't even remember what she had been saying. Her teeth sunk into her lower lip as he cupped her buttocks with his palms and lifted her with every thrust. The tension was building, becoming unbearable…
Her spine arched as she convulsed. She cried out as wave after wave of pleasure struck her.
Ku'aihelani…
"Lani, look at the porpoises!" Cassie leaned over the rail and pointed. "They're following the ship. Do you remember the first time you took me swimming with the porpoises at Hanlua Bay?"
Lani chuckled. "How could I forget? You almost drowned. You wanted to follow them forever."
Cassie smiled as she watched the sleek gray bodies cleave through the water. "It was wonderful… so much love and joy. I felt like one of them."
"Unfortunately, you don't swim well enough to become a porpoise, so you'll have to live on shore. At least you have Kapu." A smile lingered on Lani's lips as she shook her head. "Though I've often wondered if the reason you insisted on swimming with Kapu was that you wanted him to join you and the porpoises in some underwater playground."
"Don't be silly. I wouldn't be so childish. I know nature has rules that can't be broken."
"One part of you does, perhaps, but another believes that you'll find a Ku'aihelani where porpoises and horses frolic together and all is right with the world."
"Do you see that baby? Isn't he wonderful?" Laughing, Cassie glanced at her. "And I don't think that's so bad a dream."
"No, it's beautiful." She paused. "But you must be wary of what you dream."
Cassie's smile faded as she realized Lani was no longer talking about porpoises. It was bound to come. Lani had kept her silence for the last four weeks, but Cassie had been aware she was uneasy.
How strange those weeks had been. Persephone. She had scoffed at Jared's comparison, but sometimes she had felt as if she were balanced between sunlight and darkness. During the day she and Jared almost ignored each other. They seldom spoke, merely nodded in passing like strangers. Even at the supper table they never conversed directly. Only when she entered his cabin at night did the pose of indifference vanish and she was drawn into the dark, carnal world ruled by Jared. She need not worry as long as she kept the two worlds separate. "My dreams are exactly what they were before I boarded this ship."
"And all goes well with you?" Lani asked. "He pleases you?"
Heat scorched her cheeks as she remembered Jared the night before, his head between her thighs and his tongue darting, plunging. She swallowed. "He pleases me."