He said sharply: "Who?"
I said: "Kirk ... Kirkweil Carew. We have known each other a long time and have always been good friends."
His face darkened, and he cut me short.
"You declined, I hope?"
"Well, no ..."
"What?"
I said: "No ... not exactly."
"Not exactly. And what does not exactly mean?"
"I have not said yes ... yet."
"That would save some trouble."
"I don't understand."
"I have already decided on your husband."
I stared at him in astonishment.
"I was going to tell you very soon. Are we not approaching your eighteenth birthday?"
"Yes, but ..."
"Now listen to me. I am very fond of you, Kate. In fact, I did not believe I could be so fond. I like your spirit, your outlook on life. You are a complete Rosslyn."
"Maggie says I am just like my mother."
"That may be. But you are a Rosslyn too, and that is what I like. Now listen. These are my plans. If you married Sebastian, this would be your home. My daughter would inherit Rosslyn Manor. You see what I mean? All this would not have to go outside the direct line. Oh, Sebastian also has Rosslyn blood, but it is a very distant connection."
I was hardly taking this in. Marry Sebastian! I could not believe I was hearing correctly.
"It would be quite in order. You are both of the family, of course, but the relationship between you is not close enough to give any cause for concern on that score. You are only remotely connected. As a matter of fact, first cousins have married in the family before now. My dear child, this has become the greatest wish of my life. If I could see you and Sebastian married, it would not matter so much that I had no son to follow me."
"But Sebastian!" I said. "I had never thought of marrying Sebastian."
"Of course you had not, but the idea has been brewing in my mind since we went to London. It came to me suddenly then.
when I saw you in that setting. You were charming ... so adaptable, so right in every way. Then I was afraid that you would become involved in some adventure with someone there. So I brought you back. You were very young then. And I have been waiting for the time to come ..."
Even then I was too overcome by surprise to say much. I thought of Sebastian—charming, nonchalant Sebastian, who shrugged his shoulders at fate and accepted what came with that mild tolerance which in some way endeared him to one. I had often watched him while the others were fiercely expressing their views, but he sat back, smiling, unruffled.
"Well?" said my father.
"Have you ... told Sebastian of your wishes?"
"He knows."
"And what does he say?"
"He is happy with the arrangement."
That told me nothing. Sebastian would accept any proposition with equanimity. Marry Kate? he would muse. Well, it would be a solution for Lord Rosslyn, who was so eager to see one of his offspring mistress, if not master, of Rosslyn Manor. He was quite fond of Kate in his easygoing way. He would marry some day, he would suppose, so why not Kate? In any case, it was a necessity to please his benefactor, for Lord Rosslyn could as easily decide after all not to make him his heir. There were probably other remote connections of the family who would serve his purpose ... I could imagine Sebastian's reaction.
"The wedding could be on your eighteenth birthday," my father went on. "That would be rather a charming gesture. What do you say?"
"I have just told you how I feel about Kirkwell Carew."
"Oh, no, that is just a young girl's passing fancy. They have them now and then."
"I have known him for some little time. So it is hardly passing."
"At one time," said my father, "I thought it would be a fair enough match. There are now possibilities at Featherston Manor. James thinks so and he also thinks Kirkwell is the one to set it in good order. It's true that at one time I thought that he would be a fair match for you."
"Which was why you helped us hide him in the Devil's Tower."
He nodded reminiscently. "This will be a wonderful arrangement. Kate, it is what I want more than anything. If I could see your children playing in these gardens, I think I could die happy."
"Please ... please, do not talk like that."
"It's a shock to you, is it, Kate?"
"I can't really believe it."
"Why not? It's the most logical outcome imaginable. Why should you two not marry? Your children—my grandson—would inherit the place."
"When you married," I said, "you thought your sons would inherit the place. There were no sons. You have had an unhappy marriage as a result."
"That was unfortunate."
"It is not rare. There must be many barren marriages. What if this one you are proposing were too?"
"I cannot believe it would be."
"Nor could you believe yours would be."
"I was forced into marriage ..."
"And is that what you would do to me?"
"Oh, come, I know you and Sebastian are the best of friends."
"We are good friends, but ..."
"You are thinking of Kirkwell Carew."
"Yes, and that I had never thought of Sebastian as a husband, nor do I suppose he thought of me as a wife until it was suggested to him."
"I have surprised you," he said. "I have not chosen the right moment. It should have come gently."
"It is not that ... though I must say it is a surprise ... and a shock."
"You could not have cared so much for Kirkwell or there would not be all this talk of waiting."
I considered that. He noticed and a triumphant smile crossed his face.
"You are really very young as yet, Kate. Look ... do not say I will not do this or I will do that. We'll agree to wait a little. To give you time to consider. You are right not to become involved too deeply at the moment. You see, you were aware of that. You had not thought of Sebastian in the light of a husband. But let me tell you, he will be one of the best. He is good-natured, kindly, affectionate and tolerant, and that last is a very good quality in a husband. You may not be passionately in love with him, but you are fond of him. He will always be your good friend and that is also a wonderful quality in a husband. See here, Kate, do not be rash. Remember how you have dealt with Kirkweil. You were unsure about him. You are unsure about Sebastian too. Leave it for a while. Just think of Sebastian. Think of being mistress of Rosslyn Manor, which will be rather different from Featherston Manor. Oh, I know you will thrust all that aside. You will not marry for position, but for love. Very charming and romantic— and pleasant too, I will admit—but think of it, Kate. This house, with years of history behind it. Your children will be heirs to Rosslyn. Kate, think of it. And think too of the pleasure you will give to a wear\' old man because his dearest wish is granted." ^
"I did not think you regarded yourself as a wear>' old man," I said.
He laughed and said: "Kate, please ... because it means so much to me, will you think about it? Let us wait."
I could only say that I would.
Rebellion
I COULD NOT FEEL the same towards Sebastian after that. I found myself watching him, thinking of him as my husband, spending my life with him. And not far away would be Kirkwell, whom I had half promised to marry instead.
Of course I could not marry Sebastian. Of course it must be Kirkwell—serious Kirkwell, who had worked so hard to restore his family home, who cared deeply about the future of the country, who loved me with a devotion which had begun soon after our first meeting and would last throughout our lives.
But on the other hand there was Sebastian, who was a kindly, even-tempered, calm and contented man, seeking a comfortable life and letting all discomforts flow past him, because he refused to notice them. I liked him very much, and I often wondered whether, but for Kirkwell, I might have become accustomed to the idea of marrying him.