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And he did, his lips painting a pattern of crimson pleasure that blossomed and rippled and ran through her in such a rushing torrent of desire that she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried out for him to love her. There was no hesitation, no painful shyness, no shame as she lifted her hips to meet him. And then she was whirling away in a glorious rainbow of pleasure that made her gasp. And sob. And laugh with delight at the incredible beauty of it all as he carried her with him to ecstasy.

EIGHTEEN

There was a little foil packet on her tray and Betty picked it up to examine it. Letters were on the top. S . . . T . . . R . . . and the rest were so smudged she couldn’t read them. She pulled off the top and stared at the contents. Red berries inside, to spread on the whole wheat toast Nurse had brought her for an afternoon snack. Now she missed Jack more than ever. He’d always brought her cookies with strawberry ice cream.

Strawberries! Betty held the packet to her nose and sniffed. There were strawberries inside the packet, but they didn’t smell as wonderful as the strawberries in Aunt Sophia’s garden. She remembered helping to pick them while Aunt Sophia held the basket. One for Betty, and one for the basket, over and over until she couldn’t eat any more. And then, in the middle of that warm, sticky summer, Aunt Sophia had given her a beautiful white ruffled dress and said to get ready, she was a birthday girl and they were having a party. The whole family was coming, even cousins from across the sea, and there would be music and games and clowns and balloons, everything to make the birthday girl happy, even her very favorite strawberry ice cream.

Car after car had pulled into the compound, people laughing and everyone hugging and kissing her. The big table in the dining room had been heaped with presents wrapped in gold and silver and pink and blue, all gifts for the birthday girl. She’d met all her cousins and tried not to get dirty as they’d played hide-and-seek in the yard. And then she’d sat in a folding chair next to Aunt Sophia and Daddy and her brother, Mario, to watch the clowns do their tricks.

One clown had a funny bicycle with only one wheel, and he’d ridden it around and around, swerving and swooping down the garden paths as all her cousins had laughed. Another clown had brought a little white dog who could prance on his back legs and jump through hoops. The clowns had been very funny in their polka-dot suits with too-big shoes and bright red hair. They had chased each other and turned cartwheels on the grass until there was a loud bang and Daddy had pushed her down so hard she’d cried.

Then the birthday party wasn’t fun anymore because Mario had a strawberry stain on his shirt and everyone was screaming. Aunt Sophia had taken her into the house when they came with the loud sirens and flashing red lights, and she’d heard them say that Daddy had been damn lucky he’d moved just then. But Mario was gone and he’d never come back, and opening her presents hadn’t been as much fun.

There were drops of wet on her dressing gown and Betty frowned. It was silk and the wet would leave a stain. Dishes rattled in the kitchen and Betty reached for a tissue to wipe her eyes. Soon Nurse would pick up her tray and she’d go for the needle if she suspected that Betty had been crying.

Betty sat up a little straighter and concentrated on the game show. A man in a yellow and green flowered shirt was trying to answer a question worth twenty thousand dollars. The host read the question out loud. What term do scientists use to describe the large boulders left by glaciers during the Ice Age?

The name popped into Betty’s mind like magic. The boulders were called erratics. She’d learned that a long time ago when they’d studied glaciers and she’d helped Charles make a mountain out of flour and salt and water. But the man in the yellow and green shirt didn’t know and he’d lost the game.

There was a happy smile on Betty’s face as Nurse opened the door. If she had been the contestant on that game show, she would have won twenty thousand dollars.

“Not very hungry?” Nurse took the tray. “You’ve got company, so we’ll have our bath later.”

Betty was careful not to laugh out loud. Since Nurse had never bathed with her, why did she use the plural? Perhaps Nurse was using the “royal we,” pretending she was Queen of England. And then Nurse was gone and the cowgirl was there, along with her foreign actor. Betty smiled, always glad to see faces besides Nurse’s.

The quiz program was over and a movie was on, something with stirring music. It was about a runner in an important race and the cowgirl watched for a minute. “That looks like Chariots of Fire. Have you seen it before, Betty?”

Betty shook her head, even though she really wasn’t sure. With this horrid disease, she sometimes forgot the movies as soon as she watched them. If everyone in the country had her disease, the television station could save a lot of money by running the same movie over and over.

The cowgirl spoke again. “You look tired. Did you stay up late watching television?”

Betty nodded. Yes, she had, she remembered, and she recalled the movie, too, because it had frightened her.

“Which program did you watch, Betty?” The foreign actor asked the question and Betty turned to look at him. He really wanted to know. She wished she could tell him about it, but the words were very difficult to catch.

“Movie.” She heard herself speak and she was very surprised. It must have been right because he nodded.

“That sounds like fun.” The cowgirl smiled. “Do you remember what it was about?”

Betty frowned. Of course she remembered, but now she’d forgotten the word for it. She opened her mouth and nothing came out.

“Was it a romance?”

Betty shook her head. It hadn’t been a romance. She knew that. Suddenly she had an idea, and she put her hands up to her eyes to peek through her fingers.

“It was a horror movie!” The cowgirl looked very excited. “Did someone get killed?”

Betty smiled. That was exactly right, someone had died.

“Were they shot? Or maybe stabbed?” The cowgirl turned to the foreign actor. “Help me, Paul. I can’t think of any other ways.”

“Perhaps there was a drowning? An explosion? Poison?”

Betty shook her head each time he spoke. If only she could find that word! Then, before she really thought about it, her hands moved up to her neck.

“Choking!” They both spoke at once and Betty gave them a smile. That was almost right so she did it again.

“Strangling?” the cowgirl guessed. “Or maybe someone got hung?”

“Hanged,” Betty corrected. “Clothes get hung, people get hanged.”

The cowgirl looked very shocked and then she reached out to hug Betty. “That’s right! Hanged. I never could remember which was which.”

Betty laughed out loud, glad there was something someone else had trouble remembering. And the cowgirl didn’t even have the disease.

“So the subject was hanging.” The foreign actor smiled at her. “That is very frightening. Are there no comedies for you to watch?”

Betty shook her head. No comedies, just awful movies where people got killed.

“I bet it was a western!” The cowgirl looked excited again. Betty knew she must like westerns because she always dressed in the costumes. “Channel eleven runs all those old cowboy movies. Were you watching channel eleven?”

Betty held up three fingers. She had been watching forbidden channel three.