Mahalia cursed softly, then leaned over and grasped his hand. «I’m sorry. That is some ridiculous bullshit right there.»
«Ain’t it just?» Alec closed his eyes and squeezed her hand. «Hard to think rationally about everything going on when Carmen’s high on shapeshifter magic. Get it the fuck out of her, would you?»
«That’s the plan, as soon as we can.» Her chair creaked as she rocked. «I like Carmen. She’s tough.»
«You’d know.» He opened her eyes and cast her a sidelong look. «Your poor house down in Boca Raton must be getting awful lonely. You’ve pretty much been in New York or Wyoming for the last year, haven’t you?»
«Mostly,» she admitted. «Retirement isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.»
The temptation to tease was too much to resist. «The Alpha’s been in New York and Wyoming for most of the last year too.»
She blushed and swatted his arm. «Smartass. We could talk about Carmen some more.»
Mahalia, blushing. Half of the supernaturals in New Orleans would have gaped. Most of the supernatural world would do more than gape if they suspected the leader of the wolves might have tender feelings for a spell caster. «You would pick the one man I can’t intimidate with an angry glare.»
«Hush. There’s nothing like that going on.»
Yet. «Of course not.» He used his best bland I-believe-you voice. «How long does Michelle need to prepare Carmen for this damn thing anyway?»
Mahalia hesitated. «We didn’t want to scare her, not if it has to be done anyway, but I think you should know. It’s not going to be an easy process. That spell is a mess.»
Fear clenched so tight, so fast, he thought he might puke on her shoes. «What in hell did they do to her?»
«It’s not the spell, it’s the loose ends,» she said cryptically. «It wasn’t finished, settled. So there’s been all this — this extra magic, lashing around inside her. Latching on to whatever it can.»
It sounded more like a disease than a spell. «Can you get rid of it? I thought Michelle said she was sure.»
«She’s sure we can change its focus, turn it into something else. A protection.»
Which sounded like a nice, pretty way of glossing over whatever had Mahalia nervous. «Tell me about the loose ends.»
«You already know. You’ve felt them, haven’t you?» Her eyes darkened with sympathy again. «Magic seeks magic, even if it’s in someone else.»
So some of that desperate confusion twisting him up and dragging him back to Carmen was coming from the outside. It was relieving and horrifying, all at once. «So I’m a loose end.»
«You’re a complication, but one we can turn to our advantage. You care about her, and we’re going to need that to help her.»
«Whatever you need, Mahalia. Whatever the fuck you need. Just…make her okay.»
She smiled then and patted his leg. «We will.»
The worst, most damning part of all was wondering if he’d miss that magical pull. His life had been spiraling out of control since he’d found Carmen in that house, but the fear of stumbling from one day to the next had been blunted by the pleasure of falling into her.
Mahalia hummed softly. «Have a little faith, Alec. Don’t give it more power than it really has.»
Easy enough to say if you weren’t a shapeshifter, and he would have told her as much if Michelle hadn’t appeared in the doorway. It was the first time he’d seen her without her baby clutched protectively in her arms, but that wasn’t what raised the hair on the back of his neck. Power pulsed around her, the kind he’d almost forgotten dwelled in her slight body.
Michelle Peyton was a dangerous woman. A determined one. Having that power on his side eased some tension inside him. «Ready?»
She nodded, then looked to Mahalia. «Does he know?»
«Enough to start,» she answered. «He can do it.»
Alec tensed. «Do what?»
«The loose ends,» Mahalia whispered. «The ones tied up in you. You have to let them go.»
Let go. Great. Something he was fucking fantastic at. «What happens if I can’t?»
Her stare was steady. Implacable. «You have to.»
«Because it will hurt her if I don’t?»
«Because this won’t work if you don’t.»
Well, at least he had motivation. He nodded and rose, offering Mahalia his hand. «Let’s do this.»
Every single step down the dark hallway seemed to take an eternity. Carmen waited in the middle of the floor in the den, her knees drawn up to her chest, though she scrambled to her feet when they walked in. «Hi.»
Alec crossed the floor and ignored everyone else as he pulled Carmen into his arms. «Hey, sweetheart. How you doing?»
«All right.» She clutched his shirt. «Michelle’s very soothing.»
Not something Michelle heard often, he’d bet. He smoothed Carmen’s hair down and held her close, and now that he knew what he was looking for it was easy to feel the wild little curl of magic between them. Not so much, just enough to make the world a little fuzzier, to make everything that wasn’t her seem distant. Less important.
Michelle stepped up beside them. «It’s time.»
Carmen pulled back, and the look in her eyes told him that she’d already heard the hard truth Mahalia had laid out. «I guess we’ll know soon,» she murmured. «What’s real, and what’s…» She trailed off and looked away.
«Hey.» He turned her face back to his. «I like you, Carmen Mendoza. Mating instinct doesn’t cause that. Keep that in mind, huh?»
«I know.» She smiled, almost hesitantly. «Mahalia explained domino strategy to me, so I want a rematch.»
It made him laugh. «Did Mahalia tell you I always win? Maybe you should get Kat to explain it to you instead.»
«I’ll figure it out.» Her hand closed around his. «I’m smart.»
«Yeah, you are.» Alec looked to Mahalia. «So what do we do?»
«Don’t move.» She laid one hand on the back of his neck and the other on Carmen’s, her eyes closed and her brow furrowed in concentration. «Relax.»
Easier said than done. Magic brushed over him, an oddly insistent tugging, like someone plucking at the power just beneath his skin. Try as he might, he couldn’t keep from tensing. «Mahalia, explanations make me relax.»
«Right now, I’m trying to separate the two of you. Unweave where this magic inside her has latched on to you. That has to come first.»
His hands tightened on Carmen, and he forced himself to relax. To hold her gently. «Sorry.»
«Don’t apologize,» Mahalia said. «Concentrate on letting go.»
The plucking grew worse, until he felt like a pair of boots with someone jerking at the laces. When he glanced at Michelle she had her eyes closed, her face serene as she held out both hands, palms toward them. A moment later, she frowned. «Alec?»
He fought the urge to snarl at her. He lost. «What?»
«Focus on the way you feel before a change. The way you make everything quiet, just before you reach for the magic.»
Alec closed his eyes and tried. He concentrated on the wildness inside, the wolf who paced like an angry animal at the zoo, biding its time. The wolf didn’t want to relax, didn’t want to lose the wild, near-feral she-wolf it had marked.
Carmen whispered his name, her fingers squeezing his.
He had to let go, or he’d lose her in a far more devastating fashion. He smoothed his thumbs over her knuckles, using the soft, gentle touch as an anchor as the first knot of magic binding them together unraveled.
She made a soft noise of pain, almost a whimper, followed by a shaky sigh. Her hands turned, urged his to do the same, until they stood there, palm to palm, with the bonds between them quickly fading.
And then…nothing.
Quiet.
For the first time in nine days, his head cleared. The world snapped into focus, though he hadn’t realized how blurry it had gotten. With instinct settled he could think again, and the wolf echoed his sharp relief. Control had never been a human ideal he imposed on his baser half — he was control.