"What do you want from me?" I was almost sobbing.
"All you got and then some, bitch," Pascal snarled. "Shit you ain't even dreamed of."
He spoke into an intercom. I heard a metallic voice followed by a click, then he shouldered open the steel-reinforced door and pushed me inside.
There are moments in life when it seems clear the wrap-up is at hand. Your heart pounds and your blood pressure rises, but you know the blood will soon be spilled, never to flow again. Your mind flip-flops between an urge to launch one last desperate effort and a sense of resignation, a desire to just give in.
I've had this feeling a time or two, but never as vividly as at that moment. As Pascal shoved me down the hall, I knew with certainty I would not leave that house alive. My brain opted for furious action.
I turned and drove my fist as hard as I could into Pascal's face. I felt something crunch, but swung back with my elbow and brought it up under his chin. Pascal's head flew back and I slipped below his arm and bolted through a doorway on my left.
I found myself in a game room similar to that at the Vipers' clubhouse in St-Basile-le-Grand. Same bar. Same neon art. Same video monttors. The only difference was that these were working, throwing a cool blue light over the bar and its occupants.
I ran to the far side of the pool table, grabbed a cue in one hand, and fumbled for the Mace with my other, my eyes searching for any door or window.
Two men sat at the bar, another stood behind it. All three had turned at the sound of Pascal's roan They watched me tear across the room, then shifted their attention back to the door when Pascal burst through it.
"I'll kill that little bucket of shit! Where the fuck is she?" Light from the neon sign angled obliquely across Pascal's face, deepening the furrows and casting shadows across his eyes and cheeks.
"Hold it right there."
The voice was low and hard as quartz, and stopped Pascal dead. The sound of the outer door suggested Tank had opted out of further involvement. I stole a look at the man who had spoken.
He wore a double-breasted tan suit with a pale peach shirt and matching tie. His skin was tanning-booth bronze, and he probably paid his hairstylist eighty dollars per visit. Large rings adorned each of his hands.
It was the man beside him who caused my heart to stop. Andrew Ryan wore black jeans, boots, and a gray sweatshirt with the arms razored off. The muscles in his face looked hard and tense, and stubble roughened his cheeks and chin.
Ryan's eyes met mine and the flesh underneath tensed slightly, then he looked away.
I felt heat rise up my neck and spread across my cheeks. My legs trembled, and I leaned into the pool table to steady myself.
After several seconds Ryan swiveled on his bar stool and stretched his legs in my direction. A smirk spread across his face.
"Well, if it ain't shit for brains.~~
"You know this fuckin' cunt?" Pascal's voice trembled with rage. Blood trickled from his nose, and he wiped it on his sleeve.
"It's Dr. Too Goddam Many Degrees," Ryan said, drawing a pack from his pocket and tapping out a Marlboro.
The others watched as Ryan placed the cigarette between his lips, drew a wooden match from under the cellophane, lit up, and exhaled,
So did I. Ryan's hands looked so familiar on the match and cigarette I felt tears behind my lids. My chest gave a small heave.
Why is he here?
Ryan took his cigarette between thumb and forefinger, upended the matchstick between his teeth, then arched and sent it winging across the room toward me. I watched the match drop onto green felt, and fury exploded inside me.
"You turncoat bastard! You contemptible son of a bitch! Read my lips, Ryan. Drop dead!"
"See what I mean." Pascal wiped his nose again. "We're gonna teach this cunt some manners.
"Bad idea," said Ryan, taking a long drag.
The man in the gabardine suit stared at the side of Ryan's face. Several long seconds passed. The tension in the room was enough to launch arrows. Then, "Why do you say that?" he asked quietly
"She's a cop." Another drag. "And the cops already have a twoby-four up Pascal's ass for exactly this kind of shit,"
"So? You got no balls?" Pascal challenged.
Ryan blew smoke out both nostrils.
"Here's the news flash, asshole. You've already screwed up big time messing up one of your tramps, and now you drag a cop in here. You mess up a cop, particularly a dame, and the whole force comes screaming up your butt. Now, you may not mind taking the bounce for Goldilocks here, but the rest of us sure as hell will. All the shit we have in the works goes into the deep freeze while the cops dissect us top to bottom."
Pascal looked at Ryan, his eyes blazing with fury and speed.
"The fucking bitch hit me! I'm gonna tear her a new asshole." The muscles in his face jumped and his eye and mouth twitched.
The man in the suit continued to study Ryan, his face devoid of expression. Then he turned to Pascal.
"No," he said calmly. "You are not.
Pascal started to bluster, but Ryan held up a hand.
"You want to bloody her up? Watch this."
Walking to the end of the bar, Ryan snatched a red plastic bottle, circled the pool table, and held it over me. Then he squeezed, making circular movements with his hand. I didn't budge.
"Read that, Shakespeare." He slammed the bottle onto the table.
I looked down. Ketchup swirled across my shirt. As my eyes crawled back to Ryan's face, words eddied in my head I knew I wouldn't use. A
The smirk was gone, and for a long moment the Viking blues held mine. Then Ryan's gaze left me and slid back to Pascal.
"This party's over."
"The party's over when I say it is." Pascal's pupils were wider than a sewer main. He appealed to Ryan's companion.
"This puke can't talk to me like that. He's not ev- "But I can. This party's oven Now get the luck out of here."
Barely above a whisper.
Pascal's brow furrowed, and a vein bulged along his temple. With one last "Sonovabitch!" he turned and exited the room.
The man in the gabardine suit watched in silence as Ryan swung back to me.
"You keep your sorry ass, slut, but don't get any wrong ideas. This wasn't for you." He emphasized each word with a jab to my chest. "For all I care you could be upstairs doing the dirty boogie on all fours with Pascal. And take note."
He stood so close I could smell his perspiration, a scent as familiar as my own body
"Tonight's adventure is one big black hole in your memory bank. It didn't happen." He grabbed my hair and pulled my face to his. "You talk, and I'll personally lead Pascal to you."
He released me with a shove to the chest, and I staggered backward.
"We'll buzz the gate. Now disappear."
Ryan rejoined the man at the bar, sucked once on his cigarette, then flipped the butt against the stainless steel below the counter.
As I watched the spray of sparks, I felt something inside me curl into a cold, hard ball.
Without a word I lay down the poo1 cue, and fled on shaking legs. Outside the gate, I finally got the Mace out of my pocket and in a venting of frustration, humiliation, relief, and rage, I turned and sprayed the house. Sobbing, teeth chattering, I clutched the cylinder to my chest and bolted into the dark.
The clubhouse was less than six blocks from La Taverne des Rapides, and, after half-stumbling, half-running that distance, it did not take long to find my can Once inside, I locked the doors, then sat a moment, legs trembling, hands shaking uncontrollably, my mind numb. I took a deep breath and forced myself to move with slow, deliberate motions. Belt. Ignition. Shift. Gas.
Though lightning flickered, and raindrops battered the windshield, I broke all speed laws getting home. My thoughts were chaos.
Ryan had given his companion sound advice. An outlaw enterprise needs a strong reason to mess up even an adjunct cop like me. Retribution would be powerful and the organization would be out of business for an extended time. Unless the cop was wreaking major havoc, it made no sense and the man in the suit had understood that. But what about Ryan? Had sound consigliere advice been his sole motive?