Cindy had to screen the visitors carefully. Of course Clint’s old friends had to be welcomed. She also had to receive visits from people at the company he’d worked for - DGB Oil. Ann told her that the company had been calling daily, asking after Cindy, especially Henry Greerson, Clint’s boss. Clint had been a rising star in the company. Clint was smart, assertive, outspoken and did a thorough job with everything. Working as he did, researching the effects of offshore drilling on the environment, he was an important voice. And speaking at many conferences, meetings and lunches, he was in the public eye. He’d even recently been sent to Washington to speak both to members of congress and significant lobbies in the oil industry.
Clint had loved what he did and all that went with it. It was as if he were on a personal crusade to create a crucial balance - care for the wildlife and environment and find a way for much needed drilling to be done safely and wisely. Clint wasn’t someone who could be easily replaced. Not by anyone .
In preparation for receiving visitors, Cindy went to her closet and looked over her clothing. She usually dressed simply, in slacks, jeans, short skirts and shirts. There wasn’t much in her closet to cover the days of visitors she now had to receive. She wanted to make a good impression. This was Clint’s memory she was taking care of. They would remember him, partially, through the wife he had chosen, and she was determined to play the role well.
“Hurry up and get dressed. It’s almost time,” Ann called from the other room.
Cindy went into the bedroom and slipped into a simple, dark-green, linen dress in which she always felt at ease. It had a little scoop neck, medium sleeves, a lovely bodice and fell below her knees gracefully. Then she slipped into gray and green open sandals, went into the bathroom and brushed her long, auburn, tousled hair. Without a doubt, her hair was the most striking part of her, she thought, combined with the light freckles on her forehead. Clint always loved it when she brushed her hair. He would stand in the doorway and watch her for hours.
“You have no idea how beautiful you are,” he’d always say. “All the guys are crazy jealous of me. They don’t know how I landed someone like you.” Then he’d come over and kiss her on the neck. As the months went by, she’d begun to believe him.
Now she didn’t know who she was anymore.
Cindy brushed her hair for a long time, not really looking in the mirror much. It was hard to see herself standing there, getting dressed, without Clint nearby. What was the point of it?
The doorbell rang.
Oh no, she thought, they’re here.
At least the family wouldn’t be coming today. That was something to be grateful for.
She stayed in the bathroom a moment longer, and leaned against the door, listening to Ann let the visitors in. The voices rose and fell, then there was quiet. She couldn’t hide here forever.
She straightened her shoulders and walked out into the living room, as if it were a normal visit, as if nothing horrifying had happened to turn all their lives upside down.Clint always wanted me to be brave, she thought, as she sailed in. No one smiled as she entered.
Clint’s friends had arrived, as well as some acquaintances of Cindy’s from work.
“I can’t even imagine what you must be going through,” Tina, a friend of Clint’s said.
“Unbearable,” another friend, Barbara, chimed in.
Cindy was grateful for their kindness.
“We live just a few miles away,” Tina offered. “We’re here if you need us.”
Cindy felt grateful. “That’s so kind,” she said and meant it.
The doorbell rang again. Al, a longtime pal of Clint’s walked in, carrying a gift basket. He’d been the best man at the wedding. “Listen Cindy,” he said right away. “I was Clint’s best man and still am. You need anything, you let me know. That’s what a best man is for.”
He put the basket on the coffee table, started unwrapping it and giving some fruit, crackers and pieces of candy to all of them. Cindy noticed that Ann seemed to feel calmer as the afternoon went on. There were people nearby to support Cindy. She wouldn’t be totally alone.
They all remembered Clint, what a good friend he was, how much fun he was to be with, what amazing things he could have done with his life.
“The damn guy always walked a thin line though,” Al suddenly said, “Things would be going great in his life and then he’d always turn around and spend some time on the wild side.”
“What do you mean?” Cindy asked, startled.
“Danger, he had a taste for it. Nothing terrible, just some adventures he couldn’t pass by. For a while it was car racing.”
Cindy hadn’t heard anything about this.
“Yeah,” Al continued, “like when his car crashed in the third race he entered.”
“It was terrifying,” Tina said.
“His mother really freaked on him, even though he walked out of the wreck without a scratch. The crowd let out a scream when they saw him alive. But he gave up racing anyway. He was always lucky in strange kinds of ways.”
“I guess his luck ran out,” Tina said, sadly.
“Jesus,” Al said. “I just can’t believe this. How did it happen?”
The doorbell rang again. Ann got up and let Henry Greerson in.
Clearly, Greerson had come straight from work. He still wore a pin striped suit and tie and had the paper rolled under his arm. Probably read it on the train ride out. Cindy hadn’t expected him to come. He walked in, stopped for a moment, and gave Cindy a long look.
“Of course,” he said. “I would have come sooner. Your sister said you weren’t taking visitors.”
“I couldn’t in the beginning.”
“Naturally.”
There was something off-putting about him. He had thin lips, hazel, piercing eyes and a sallow complexion, even though the days were warm and sun plentiful. She supposed he lived in the city and didn’t get much time outdoors.
“I want you to know that I represent everyone in the company when we tell you how sorry we are. Clint is a great loss. If there is anything we can do to help your transition, you must feel free to call on us.”
Cindy shivered. She did not feel she could call on this man for anything. As he sat down and made himself comfortable, she vaguely remembered that he had flown out to Barbados right after Clint’s death. He had been the other one to identify the body. She also remembered that Clint had spoken well of him.
Cindy saw Al looking at him carefully, too. Greerson seemed out of synch with the group that had gathered—too formal, smug, a bit intimidating.
Ann stood up. “Would you care for a cup of coffee, Mr. Greerson?” she asked.
“That would be lovely,” he replied.
Ann left to get the coffee and pastries and he turned to Cindy. “You have quite a wonderful sister,” he said.
“Yes,” she said softly, wondering how he knew Ann was her sister. “More than wonderful. In fact, I couldn’t have gotten along at all without her these past days.”
“How long is she staying?” Barbara piped up.
“Forever,” Cindy laughed.
Greerson looked surprised. “She’s moving here to be with you?”
Cindy was taken aback. How did he know Ann didn’t live nearby?
“Who knows,” Cindy replied jokingly. “Right now it feels like anything could happen. The world seems upside down.”
“Hell, this world is upside down,” Al said. “When a great guy like Clint is washed away, what can you count on anymore?”