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Talking with Mr. Todd Carter was a strange experience. I mean, there I was, a Negro in a rich white man’s office, talking to him like we were best friends — even closer. I could tell that he didn’t have the fear or contempt that most white people showed when they dealt with me.

It was a strange experience but I had seen it before. Mr. Todd Carter was so rich that he didn’t even consider me in human terms. He could tell me anything. I could have been a prized dog that he knelt to and hugged when he felt low.

It was the worst kind of racism. The fact that he didn’t even recognize our difference showed that he didn’t care one damn about me. But I didn’t have the time to worry about it. I just watched him move his lips about lost love until, finally, I began to see him as some strange being. Like a baby who grows to man-size and terrorizes his poor parents with his strength and his stupidity.

“I love her, Mr. Rawlins. I’d do anything to get her back.”

“Well I wish ya luck on that. But I think you better get Albright away from her. He wants that money.”

“Will you find her for me? I’ll give you a thousand dollars.”

“What about Albright?”

“I’ll tell my associates to fire him. He won’t go against us.”

“Suppose he does?”

“I’m a rich man, Mr. Rawlins. The mayor and the chief of police eat at my house regularly.”

“Then why can’t they help you?”

He turned away from me when I asked that.

“Find her for me,” he said.

“If you gimme something to hold, say two hundred dollars, I’ll give it a try. I ain’t sayin’ nuthin’s gonna come from it. She could be back in New Orleans for all I know.”

He stood up smiling. He touched my hand with his papery grip. “I’ll have Mr. Baxter draw up a check.”

“Uh, sorry, but I need cash.”

He pulled out his wallet and flipped through the bills. “I have a hundred and seventy-some-odd in here. They could write you a check for the rest.”

“I’ll take one-fifty,” I said.

He just took all the money from his wallet and handed it over, mumbling, “Take it all, take it all.”

And I took it too.

Somewhere along the way I had developed the feeling that I wasn’t going to outlive the adventure I was having. There was no way out but to run, and I couldn’t run, so I decided to milk all those white people for all the money they’d let go of.

Money bought everything. Money paid the rent and fed the kitty. Money was why Coretta was dead and why DeWitt Albright was going to kill me. I got the idea, somehow, that if I got enough money then maybe I could buy my own life back.

Chapter 18

I had to find Frank Green. Knifehand held the answer to my problems. He knew where the girl was, if anybody did, and he knew who killed Coretta; I was sure of that. Richard McGee was dead too, but I didn’t care about that death because the police couldn’t connect me to it.

It’s not that I had no feelings for the murdered man; I thought it was wrong for a man to be murdered and, in a more perfect world, I felt that the killer should be brought to justice.

But I didn’t believe that there was justice for Negroes. I thought that there might be some justice for a black man if he had the money to grease it. Money isn’t a sure bet but it’s the closest to God that I’ve ever seen in this world.

But I didn’t have any money. I was poor and black and a likely candidate for the penitentiary unless I could get Frank to stand between me and the forces of DeWitt Albright and the law.

So I went out looking.

The first place I went was Ricardo’s Pool Room on Slauson. Ricardo’s was just a hole-in-the-wall with no windows and only one door. There was no name out front because either you knew where Ricardo’s was or you didn’t belong there at all.

Joppy had taken me to Ricardo’s a few times after we locked up his bar. It was a serious kind of place peopled with jaundice-eyed bad men who smoked and drank heavily while they waited for a crime they could commit.

It was the kind of place you could get killed in but I was safe as long as I was with a tough man like Joppy Shag. Still, when Joppy would leave the pool table to go to the toilet I could almost feel the violence pulsing in the dark.

But I had to go to places like Ricardo’s to look for Frank Green. Because Frank was in the hurting trade. Maybe there was somebody who had taken his money, or messed with his girl, and Frank needed a gunman to back him up in the kill — Ricardo’s was where he’d go. Maybe he just needed an extra hand in taking down a cigarette shipment. The men in Ricardo’s were desperate; they lived for hurting.

It was a large room with four pool tables, a green lampshade hanging above each one. The walls were lined with straight-back chairs where most of the customers sat, drinking from brown paper bags and smoking in the dim light. Only one skinny youth was shooting pool. That was Mickey, Rosetta’s son.

Rosetta had run the place ever since Ricardo got diabetes and lost both his legs. He was upstairs someplace, in a single bed, drinking whiskey and staring at the walls.

When I’d heard about Ricardo’s illness I said to her, “I’m sorry t’hear it, Rose.”

Rosetta’s face was squat and wide. Her beady eyes pressed down into her chubby brown cheeks. She squinted at me and said, “He done enough ho’in ’round fo’ two men and then some. I guess he could rest now.” And that’s all she said.

She was sitting at the only card table at the far side of the room. I walked over to her and said, “Evenin’, Rosetta, how you doin’ t’nite.”

“Joppy here?” she asked, looking around me.

“Naw. He still workin’ at the bar.”

Rosetta looked at me as if I were a stray cat come in after her cheese.

The room was so dark and smoky that I couldn’t make out what anyone was doing, except for Mickey, but I felt eyes on me from the haze. When I turned back to Rosetta I saw that she was staring too.

“Anybody been sellin’ some good whiskey lately, Rose?” I asked. I had hoped to have some light talk with her before asking my question but her stare unsettled me and the room was too quiet for just talk.

“This ain’t no bar, honey. You want whiskey you better go see yo’ friend Joppy.” She glanced at the door, telling me to leave, I suppose.

“I don’t want a drink, Rose. I’m lookin’ t’buy a case or two. Thought maybe you might know how I could get some.”

“Why’ont you ast yo’ friend anyway? He know where the whiskey grow.”

“Joppy send me here, Rose. He say you the one t’know.”

She was still suspicious but I could see that she wasn’t afraid. “You could try Frank Green if you want t’buy by the box.”

“Yeah? Where can I get a’hold of’im?”

“I ain’t seen’im in a few days now. Either he shacked up or he out earnin’ his trade.”

That was all Rosetta had to say on the subject. She lit up a cigarette and turned away. I thanked her back and wandered over to Mickey.

“Eight ball?” asked Mickey.

It really didn’t matter what we played. I put a five down and lost it, then I lost five more. That took me about a half an hour. When I figured I’d paid enough for my information I saluted the hustler and walked out into the sun.

I had a feeling of great joy as I walked away from Ricardo’s. I don’t know how to say it, exactly. It was as if for the first time in my life I was doing something on my own terms. Nobody was telling me what to do. I was acting on my own. Maybe I hadn’t found Frank but I had gotten Rosetta to bring up his name. If she had known where he was I would have gotten to him that day.