But private education is expensive, and it had been far beyond Harry's means-and even if he could have afforded it, I doubt that Harry would have gone for it. He had always been wary of elitism, and he believed in all of our public institutions. Even public school-or perhaps especially public school, since it taught a brand of survival skills he knew we would need.
It was clearly a set of skills the two missing girls could have used. By the time Debs and I finished the interviews, around five-thirty, we had learned some very interesting things about both of them, but nothing that suggested they could survive in the wilds of Miami without a credit card and an iPhone.
Samantha Aldovar remained a little bit of a puzzle, even to those who thought they knew her well. The students were aware that she got financial aid, but it seemed to be no big deal to anybody. They all said she was pleasant, quiet, good at math, and had no boyfriend. No one could think of any reason why she would stage her own disappearance. No one could remember ever seeing her hanging around with any kind of disreputable character-except Tyler Spanos.
Tyler was apparently a true wild child, and on the face of things, the friendship between the two girls was extremely unlikely. Where Samantha got a ride to and from school with her mother in a four-year-old Hyundai, Tyler drove her own car-a Porsche. While Samantha was quiet and shy, Tyler seemed to be the original Good Time Charlene, a perpetual loud party just looking for a place to happen. She did not have a boyfriend only because she could not limit herself to one boy at a time.
And yet a close friendship had developed over the last year or so and the two girls were almost always together at lunch, after school, and on weekends. Not only was this puzzling, it was the one thing that bothered Deborah more than any other. She had calmly listened and asked questions, put out a BOLO on Tyler's Porsche, and (with a shudder) sent her partner, Deke, to talk to the Spanos family, and none of these things had caused so much as a ripple on the face of the Sea of Deborah. But the strange friendship between the two girls had, for some reason, caused her to come up on point like a cocker spaniel sniffing steak.
"It makes no fucking sense," she said.
"They're teenagers," I reminded her. "They're not supposed to make sense."
"Wrong," Deborah said. "Some things always make sense, especially with teenagers. Nerds hang with nerds; jocks and cheerleaders hang with jocks and cheerleaders. That never changes."
"Perhaps they have some kind of secret mutual interest," I suggested, glancing casually at my watch, which told me that it was very close to time for me to go home.
"I'd bet on it," said Debs. "And I'd bet that if we find it, we find out where they are."
"Nobody else here seems to know what it might be," I said, even though I was actually trying to construct a graceful exit line.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Deborah said abruptly.
"Excuse me?"
"You keep squirming around like you have to pee," she said.
"Oh, um, actually," I said, "it's almost time for me to go. I have to pick up Cody and Astor before six."
My sister stared at me for what seemed like a long time. "I never would have believed it," she said at last.
"Believed what?"
"That you'd be married, kids, you know. A family man, with all you got going on."
And by that I knew she meant my darker side, my former role as Dexter the Avenger, the lone blade in the moonlight. She had found out about my alter ego, and had apparently become reconciled with it-and just in time for me to abandon the persona. "Well," I said, "I don't suppose I would have believed it either. But…" I shrugged. "Here I am with a family."
"Yeah," she said, and she looked away. "And before me."
I watched her face working to rearrange itself back to her usual mask of perpetual grumpy authority, but it took several moments, and in the interval she looked shockingly vulnerable.
"Do you love her?" she said suddenly, swinging back to face me, and I blinked with surprise. Such a blunt and personal question was very unlike Deborah, which was one reason we got along so well. "Do you love Rita," she repeated, leaving me no wiggle room whatsoever.
"I… don't know," I answered carefully. "I'm, uh, used to her."
Deborah stared and then shook her head. "Used to her," she said. "Like she's an easy chair or something."
"Not that easy," I said, trying to inject a little levity into what had suddenly become a very unsettling conversation.
"Do you even feel love at all?" she demanded. "I mean, can you?"
I thought of Lily Anne. "Yes," I said. "I think so."
Deborah watched my face for several long seconds, but there was really not much to see, and she finally turned away and looked out through the old wooden window frame at the bay. "Shit," she said. "Go home. Go get your kids and hang out with your easy-chair wife."
I had not been human for very long, but even so, I knew something was not quite right in the Land of Deborah and I could not leave her on that note. "Debs," I said. "What's wrong?"
I saw her neck muscles tense, but she continued to look away, out over the water. "All this family shit," she said. "With these two girls and their fucked-up families. And your family with fucked-up you. It's never what it should be, and it's never right but everybody gets it except me." She took a deep breath and shook her head. "And I really want it." She swung back at me with ferocity. "And no goddamn jokes about the biological clock, all right?"
To be completely honest, which I am when I have to be, I was far too deeply shocked by Deborah's behavior for any jokes, whether about clocks or anything else. But joke or no, I knew I had to say something, and I cast about for the right thing and could only come up with a question about Kyle Chutsky, her live-in boyfriend of several years. I had seen the approach on a daytime drama a few years back. I liked to study them for clues on how to act in ordinary situations, and it looked like that was going to pay off here. "Is everything okay with Kyle?" I said.
She snorted, but her face softened. "Fucking Chutsky. Thinks he's too old and beat-up and useless for a nice young thing like me. Keeps saying I can do better. And when I say maybe I don't want to do better, he just shakes his head and looks sorrowful."
It was all very interesting, a truly riveting look into the life of someone who had been a human being much longer than I had, but I was all out of ideas for constructive commentary, and I felt very much the pressure of the clock-the one on my wrist, not the biological one. So, floundering about for something to say that would be properly comforting and yet hint at my need for immediate departure, all I could come up with was, "Well, I'm sure he means well."
Deborah stared at me long enough to make me wonder if I had really said the right thing. Then she sighed heavily and turned to face out the window again. "Yeah," she said. "I'm sure he means well, too." And she looked out at the bay and didn't say anything but, worse than any words she could have uttered, she actually sighed.
This was a side of my sister I had not seen before, and it was not a side I wanted to see a great deal more of. I was used to Deborah being full of sound and fury, signifying arm punches. To see her soft and vulnerable and roiling with self-pity was unsettling in the extreme. Even though I knew I should say something comforting, I had no idea where to begin, and so I stood there awkwardly, until finally the need to leave was stronger than my sense of obligation.
"I'm sorry, Debs," I said, and oddly enough, I was. "I have to get the kids now."
"Yeah," she said without turning around. "Go get your kids."
"Um," I said, "I need a ride, back to my car."
She turned slowly away from the window and looked over at the building's door, where Ms. Stein was hovering. Then she nodded and stood up. "All right," she said. "We're done here." She walked past me, paused only to thank Ms. Stein with flat politeness, and led the way back to her car in silence.
The silence lasted almost all the way to my car and it was not very comfortable. I felt like I should say something, lift the mood a bit, but my first two attempts fell so flat that I stopped trying. Debs pulled into the parking lot at work and stopped beside my car, staring straight ahead through the windshield with the same look of unhappy introspection she'd been wearing for the whole trip. I watched her for a moment, but she didn't look back.
"All right," I said at last. "See you tomorrow."
"What's it like?" she said, and I paused with the door half-open.
"What's what like?" I said.
"When you held your baby for the first time," she said.
I didn't have to think very hard to answer that. "Amazing," I said. "Absolutely wonderful. It's not like anything else in the world."
She looked at me, and I couldn't tell whether she was going to hug me or hit me, but she didn't do either, and finally she just shook her head, slowly. "Go get your kids," she said. I waited for a second, to see if she would say anything else, but she didn't.
I got out of the car and as she drove slowly away I stood and watched, trying to fathom what was going on with my sister. But it was clearly something far too complicated for a newly minted human, so I shrugged it off, got into my car, and went to get Cody and Astor.