There was a long moment of silence between the two of us as Jessica tried to find words to come back at mine. I hoped that I’d talked some sense into her. If only that had been true.
“That’s going to be a risk I’ll have to take,” she said after she worked up the nerve to defy me yet again. “If it means stopping Michael from using those pictures against us then I’m going to do whatever it takes. You’re not going to lose your scholarship just because of me.”
“I don’t care about the scholarship, Jessica!” I said, entwining my fingers through my hair. I closed my eyes, leaning forward onto my elbows as I tried to figure out a way to save her from what I knew would only be trouble.
“I have to do this, Richard,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “This is one of the only chances we’re going to have to keep ourselves safe from him. This has got to be done, and I have to be the one to do it.”
“I’ll come with you,” I tried to bargain, hoping that with me there she’ll at least have some chance at getting out of there unaccosted. “I can step in if things get too bad.”
“We can’t risk him seeing you,” she said. “If he spots you, he’ll know that something is happening and he’ll run. Michael’s not a dumb guy, but he won’t expect something like this from me of all people. He thinks I’d never do anything like this.”
“Jessica,” I said, trying to appeal to her, “I don’t think this is going to be a good idea. If he hurts you then I don’t know what I’m going to do… Or if I can stop myself from hurting him. I’ll make good on the promise I made him and make sure he rolls across that stage in a wheelchair—unless I put him in a body bag first.”
“I know, and that’s why I can’t have you there—you might jeopardize everything if Michael catches sight of you. I need you to stay away until everything is done. Can you do that for me?”
I stared around at my darkened dormitory, looking at the way the moonlight played against the white walls, casting dark shadows that could have swallowed up the sun.
“I don’t know if I can, not if you’re in danger,” I replied, my fist clenched.
“Then you need to promise me, Richard,” she said. “I need you to promise that you’ll let me do this on my own, for both our sakes. If he sees you then those pictures are as good as on the internet already. Do you understand?”
I put my head in my hands, fretting over what might happen if I left her go off on her own like that. How could she expect me not to come after her? To be there to keep her safe after what we’d built together? I wasn’t sure if I could make that kind of promise, to just let her walk right into the lion’s den with only a cellphone for protection and the hope that nothing swallows her whole. How could she expect me to just stand by?
She’s a big girl, I thought, though I hated myself for it. I can’t stop her from doing anything she wants, and I shouldn’t. I have to trust her to take care of herself.
But was it her that I didn’t trust? Thoughts of Michael danced through my head, mocking me with images of Jessica being pulled into the same back room that Becky had been raped in. She could end up just like Becky, or worse. God knows how many college girls go missing year after year, and if she turned into just another face on a milk carton, I’d never forgive myself. But I didn’t really have much of a choice.
“What if you get hurt? What if something bad happens, and I’m not there to protect you?” I asked. “How am I supposed to just let you put yourself in danger?”
“I don’t know, Richard,” she whispered into the phone. “But I need you to try for me. I need you to trust me.”
I rubbed the bridge of my nose in frustration. There was no getting around it.
“Fine,” I said at last. “I can’t stop you… I just hate the idea of something happening to you, Jessica. I hate what he might do to you if I’m not there to stop him. I don’t know if I can live with myself.”
“I know,” she said gently, “I’m scared too. But we have to do this if we want to be free of him.”
“Yeah, I know.”
I ran my fingers through my short locks, shaking my head. I wasn’t sure how I’d stay sane, wondering if she would be okay or if I’d be able to keep my promise.
“If anything goes wrong, Greg will have 9-1-1 on speed-dial,” she said, trying to be reassuring. “He’ll be listening to the whole thing. I won’t be alone. We’ll call in the real police, not some on-campus assholes.”
“This is dangerous,” I said.
“What’s life without a little danger?” she asked, trying to sound playful. It didn’t help.
“I’m worried,” I said again, lying back against my pillow.
“I know you are,” she whispered soothingly over the phone. “And you’re tired. You should get some sleep.”
“I guess,” I muttered, though I didn’t know how I’d ever be able to close my eyes with the thought of Jessica in Michael’s clutched running through my head.
“I love you, Richard.”
“I love you too, Jess,” I whispered back before I heard the soft beep that signaled the end of the call.
I sat awake in bed for what felt like hours before I eventually managed to close my eyes and drift into a fitful sleep. All the while I hoped that somehow my stepsister would be okay, and that after all of this was done, I’d be able to hold her in my arms again.
Chapter 19
Jessica
AEΩ was throwing their annual party to welcome their pledges as full brothers, which was a perfect time for me to get close to Michael. Just the thought of it had my skin crawling as I stood in front of the full length mirror that Becky and I both shared.
I was dressed in a short mini-skirt with a tight black top that clung to me in way I wasn’t used to from my clothes. I shivered as my stomach peeked out from the bottom of the top, exposing the bottom half of my bellybutton. Normally I was practically covered from head neck to knee, my tops barely ever showing even an inch of my cleavage. While most girls had spent their time as school trying to get people to notice their bodies, I had always done my best to make sure everyone ignored mine.
Seeing how I looked now, I knew that I was going to be very hard to ignore.
“Are you sure about this?” I asked looking over at Becky. “I feel so weird wearing this.”
“I know, sweetie,” she said, giving me a distressed smile. “It’s not my usual fare either, but we need something that will help you blend in with the kind of girls who go to parties at AEΩ.”
I sighed, trying to tuck the bottom of the top down over my exposed midriff, which only served in exposing more of my substantial cleavage, enhanced all the more by the push-up bra I was wearing underneath. This felt so strange, so… not me.
“You’re going to do great,” Greg said. “I’m going to be listening in to everything that happens, and you’ll be able to hear me.”
He walked over, holding out what looked like a flesh-colored lump of plastic.
“What’s that?” I asked, frowning at it.
“An earpiece,” he said. “Can’t really have you on your phone the entire time, can we?”
I looked at him, my eyebrows raised.
“Where did you get all of this, Greg?” Becky asked, picking up what looked like a black rectangle from the bed. “It looks really expensive.
“A friend of mine needed to get some of it out of his dorm before an inspection,” he said, smiling nervously as I took the ear-piece from him and tentatively fitted it into my ear. “Look, don’t try to think about what he was doing with it… Just be glad it was there. Stuff like this isn’t exactly permitted on campus… or anywhere.”