Not much later, I was in the backseat with Parrish again at my side, my hands and feet bound, although this time, warm gloves had been placed on my hands. The oddity of this bit of care made me wonder if they were designed to keep my hands warm or to keep me from leaving fingerprints somewhere.
Donovan drove. Kai, in the front passenger seat again, had fallen asleep even before we began our ascent into the mountains.
Parrish, I had noticed, looked tired, as if he hadn’t slept well. Donovan must have noticed this, too.
“I think I slept better in the car than on that damned cot,” Donovan said.
Parrish laughed. “They were pieces of shit, weren’t they? I’ll have a talk with the person who bought them.”
“Didn’t do a bad job of supplying the place otherwise, though,” Donovan said.
“No,” Parrish admitted. “But the main purpose was to have a safe place to rest.”
“I wish you had let me set it up. I don’t like so many people being able to talk about where you’ve been or where you might be next.”
“Don’t worry, Donovan. I have an excellent ability to determine who is and isn’t truly loyal to me.”
“Right. Like Quinn Moore.”
Parrish shot a glance at me, then frowned. “I really would prefer, Son, that you not toss names around quite so freely.”
“As if she’s going to live to tell anybody.”
I moved my head so that all any of them could see was the back of my parka. I fantasized about getting that cell phone away from Parrish at some point, but this seemed so unlikely, I began to ask myself why I bothered dreaming that I was going to escape. I stared out the window, struggling against despair, thinking of people I wished I could see one more time. You are alive. Stay focused, stay alive.
“All the same,” Parrish insisted, “I require more discretion from you.”
“Okay, I hear what you’re saying.”
“I wonder if you do,” Parrish said.
“Of course I do. You really don’t think any of your children are stupid, do you?”
“Stupid? No. Disloyal? Well, you’ve answered that one already.”
Donovan continued to puzzle me. What was real, and what was manipulation? What was a show to gain my compliance, what was a show for Parrish and Kai? Violet had said they had a hold over him. At the time, I had still been shaking off the effects of being drugged-by him.
My conversation with Donovan at the Fireside came back to me. What if he had told me the truth even as he drugged me? I tried to focus my mind, recall the details. He had unknowingly fathered a daughter whose existence had been hidden from him by his ex-wife. The ex-wife had told another man that the child was his. The ex-wife had died, and eventually, it had been proved that Donovan was the child’s biological father. From there, things were hazy, but I did recall that he had said this was a missing person case, that his daughter had disappeared, along with her grandmother.
So if Parrish and his Moths had somehow taken the child and grandmother… would Donovan care enough about them to involve himself in a number of crimes-aiding and abetting Parrish, kidnapping me, making himself an accessory to murder, to name a few-for a child he had never met and an ex-mother-in-law?
I thought about Quinn Moore. There was no question of his involvement now, and the more I considered that, the easier certain aspects of Parrish’s escape and ability to remain hidden were to figure out. Primarily, Quinn could bring money and other resources into the picture. And he owned the properties on which the bodies of Kai’s victims had been found.
I found myself suddenly sitting upright then. Kai had buried his victims in his own backyard. The frozen victims had not shown the level of decay that would have been evident in remains that had spent even a short period of time in the ground. Were those frozen victims Quinn Moore’s?
Parrish noticed my change in posture and began talking about his elaborate plans for torturing me. He was sorry, he said, that they would be without electricity, because there were a number of ways he wanted to use it on me. Kai gleefully pointed out that a car battery would work just fine.
This discussion was interrupted when Donovan asked, “Do you want me to take the usual roads from here? Or do you have a special route in mind?”
Parrish had a special route, of course.
“Quinn knows where we’re headed,” Donovan said, apparently willing to break Parrish’s rule again. “I’m concerned about that.”
“Quinn thinks he knows where we’re headed,” Parrish said. “He does not. Besides, I doubt he’ll be so foolish as to cooperate with the police. If he does, neither he nor they will be pleased with the outcome.”
As I watched out the window, we drove from areas of dry scrub into forest. We were on narrow, unmaintained, and often muddy dirt roads that twisted and turned in single lanes, and if nothing else, I had to admire Donovan’s driving skills-I don’t think I would have tackled most of those roads in the dark. The unavoidable jolting bothered Kai and Parrish more than it did me, and I took secret pleasure in that.
The trees were taking misty shape in gray light. Twilight.
I thought of a friend who was an amateur astronomer, who’d told me that, although most people did not think of this time of day as twilight, associating that term only with the end of a day, twilight was also the time before dawn, a period of incomplete darkness.
The sky lightened, and above and around me and within me, the universe continued to expand.
Nick Parrish did not know me.
I was not the person Nick Parrish had known the last time I had been in his power. I was not the person I had been when I first learned of his escape.
Like the rest of the universe, I had changed. So had he.
If Donovan was my ally and not my enemy, we actually had a good chance of defeating my two other captors.
I wasn’t sure he was my ally, though. The fact that he was helping them take me into the wilderness with them didn’t make it seem likely that I mattered to him, and if I was the price for his child’s life-however little he’d had to do with that life-I could not bring myself to blame him for making the trade.
The SUV came to a halt.
“All right, let’s get going,” Parrish said.
“I’ll help you unload, hide the car, then meet you there,” Donovan said.
“What the fuck?” Kai said, raising the gun and pointing it at Donovan. “Dad told you to get going.”
Behaving as if Kai wasn’t sitting next to him, let alone aiming a weapon at him, Donovan turned toward Parrish and said, “I know you planned for Quinn to take care of this, but he’s not going to come up here. There’s no way in hell he can make it, even if he wants to rejoin you, and you know it. If we leave a car here, we might as well light off a fireworks display announcing where you are.”
“No one can trace this vehicle to me.”
“If Quinn keeps his mouth shut.”
Parrish opened his mouth to protest, then shut it, frowning. He shook his head. “You may be right. But as I’m sure you’re also aware, you are needed to carry additional supplies. I don’t think I really want to give you the chance to drive off and tell the police where we are.”
“You know why I won’t do that.”
“Really? Do I?”
“Of course you do.”
Parrish studied him for a long moment.
Kai said, “I can get rid of the car.”
“You, who have no outdoor experience, are going to hike back several miles off trail?” Donovan asked. “Injured?”
“While I wish it weren’t so, Kai,” Parrish said, “he has a point.”
Kai looked angry but said nothing more.