Also, I’ve got an epilogue idea that I’m going to write. We can omit it from DRACULAS, but it’s where I want to go when the sequel rolls around…
Joe
• • •
I think we can give our readers more credit. “Dr. Mortenson” is a pretty fair clue. And if not, twice she thinks she’s met him before. Pairing those with your previous transformation scene pretty much gives it away, no? I don’t think we need to hit them over the head. I’d rather have them make the leap on their own - that way they go from passive to participant. Those who don’t glom on their own will get smacked in the head with it when the guy in the scrubs starts feeding the baby his blood.
Paul
• • •
It wouldn’t be hitting them over the head. It would be subtle.
But I do think we need to spell it out in the last scene. I can see some folks going, “Huh? How did the doctor become a dracula?”
I’m going to tweak it to try it. We can always axe it if it doesn’t work.
Joe
• • •
Okay, 4.3 is done, and the book is done.
Let’s all read the last twenty pages and discuss if it works for everyone. I’m sure we’ll change some stuff. And we might cut my prologue, but I wanted to hint that a follow-up book will have werewolves in it.
Also, we still need a book excerpt from Paul and an interview question answered from Jeff.
Excellent job, everyone!
Joe
• • •
Woo-hoo! Can’t wait to read.
Blake
• • •
Guys, I think we have an important decision to make for which cover we go out with on October 19th.
Check it out:
http://www.amazon.com/DRACULAS-Chapters-Upcoming-Release-ebook/dp/B0042ANZBU/ref=sr_1_1?s=gateway&ie=UTF8&qid=1285261706&sr=8-1
I happen to think the cover without our names on it is much more striking, Intriguing, and buzz worthy. It’s just plain bad ass. Joe - perhaps we could ask your readers on your blog, continue the involvement of marketing on all levels with the fans?
Blake
• • •
And another point…not having four names on the cover points to the underlying which is to create one, seamless novel. Subconsciously, I think readers will favorably make that connection and be more apt to buy.
Blake
• • •
I’m for the names. I want my name on my books.
But the title by itself looks sweet on a t-shirt.
Joe
• • •
Read the end, fantastic…made some small changes…
1. took this out: “in a mini-reenactment of the trade towers’ collapse” - that’s going to pull everyone out of the moment.
2. changed what Zeke the dog is eating to a rat per Adam’s earlier scene…makes sense a rat and not a dracula would have escaped the hospital.
3. changed Dr. Mortenson to Dr. Cook…not quite as on the nose.
4. Put Clayton’s death (just the last paragraph) after the 2nd to last Shanna scene.
Paul - can you drop a choice chapter excerpt into your folder? I’ll add it to the manuscript
Jeff - please finish the interview.
I think Joe and I are good with this draft to begin proofing if you guys are.
Blake
• • •
My wife finished reading it, and loved it. But she had a few concerns.
1. She still holds out hope that Clay somehow survived.
2. She guessed Mortenson was Moorecook the moment he picked up the kid.
3. She didn’t like it saying “the end.” because Driscoll and the Zeke scene were unresolved, she felt it should end with “To be continued…”
4. She’s pissed we killed everyone.
I explained to her that the building was incinerated, and that Clay was 100% dead, but if it wasn’t clear to her, it won’t be clear to others. So we should consider making it either more final, or more ambiguous about the possibility of him surviving.
But keep in mind that the more threads we have hanging, the likelier we are to annoy a certain percentage of readers.
Blake changing Moretenson to Cook is better, and maybe we should go with Paul’s original line and have him ask Shanna’s name to throw the reader off a bit. I thought it was too much misdirection, but I was apparently wrong.
Maria feels it ended too abruptly, which is a clear sign she wanted more. That’s fine, but I don’t want that dissatisfaction to result in bunch of one star Amazon reviews. Perhaps that could be nullified if we have the first chapter of DRACULAS 2 as a bonus feature.
As for killing folks, she cried at the death scenes, so I think they worked. But I don’t want people finishing this book confused and angry.
Blake, gimme a call and I’ll put you on the phone with my wife.
Joe
• • •
Also, we need to keep an eye on a few consistencies.
Some internal monologue is in italics. Some isn’t. We should unify it one way or the other.
Also, Clay calls them “draculas.” According to Blake, that’s what they’re called in The Passage, which I haven’t read, but which came out after we had the idea for Draculas.
Might want to not call them “draculas” so we don’t sound derivative, even though we came first. We might want to stick with the full length “draculas.”
Incidentally, the title “Draculas” came from a Twitter joke I did on March 27, 2010.
“There’s nothing to fear, but fear itself. And Draculas. There’s probably one in your closet right now.”
I liked it enough to repeat the joke in CUB SCOUT GORE FEAST that I wrote with Strand, and then had a eureka moment when I realized it would make a good title for a horror book.
Joe
• • •
When I put it up on FB, one comment was, “Oh, I thought it was 2 new authors - Crouch Kilborn and Strand Wilson.” Of course, he was being facetious.
Paul
• • •
That Crouch Kilborn guy is a dick.
Joe
• • •
Done - a sequence from MIDNIGHT MASS.
Paul
• • •
1. She still holds out hope that Clay somehow survived.
Nothing wrong with hope. But he and Alice are together in that Great Shooting Range in the Sky.
2. She guessed Mortenson was Moorecook the moment he picked up the kid.
That’s because she’s smart (choice of spouse notwithstanding.)
3. She didn’t like it saying “the end.” because Driscoll and the Zeke scene were unresolved, she felt it should end with “To be continued…”
No reason we can’t put “(Not)” or “(Not really…)” beneath it. We’ve been having fun with the readers all along. Why stop now?
4. She’s pissed we killed everyone.
Not Shanna and not Moorecook. But this IS horror fiction, not romance, so a happy ending is not guaranteed.
That said, I’m not a fan of epilogues in general and this one is no exception. Ending with the baby nursing on Moorecook’s blood hints that the story is going to ramp up to another level. The epilogue puts us back to square one: the start of another epidemic. I’ll go with what the majority decides, but that’s my $0.02.
Paul
• • •
“Blake, gimme a call and I’ll put you on the phone with my wife.”
Oh hell.
Blake
• • •