Still she was not Reading, but she responded to Lenardo's stricken look. "Can't you understand? I must do this for us, for our people, for our children, Lenardo. What kind of world do you want them to grow up in?"
"Not a world," he replied, "in which power is used only to gain more power. Will you never stop, Aradia? If you form your empire, will your first move be to take the Aventine Empire, and be damned to attempts to make a treaty with them? And what next? Drive north? Take all the savage lands, one after another, war upon war just to prove that you have power? I'll be no party to it, nor will Julia. Your Reading powers will disappear if you use them for personal gain. You'll still be a Lady Adept, but which will you be? Someone like your father, building for the future and making a better life for your people? Or will you become another Drakonius, caring for nothing but conquest-murdering, destroying, until in desperation other Adepts form an alliance strong enough to destroy you."
All color had drained from her face, and her eyes dilated so that they appeared black. But Lenardo turned on his heel and stalked out, heading for Wulfston's room at the other end of the house. Behind him, the door slammed shut.
As he approached, laughter came from Wulfston's room- the Adept's and Julia's. He paused. Wulfston opposed Aradia's plan, and there was little chance now that she could get Julia's cooperation. She would have to come around, and if she did, it would be best if her brother did not know that she had temporarily fallen back into power madness. It had to be temporary. Aradia was too intelligent to cling to a plan that would set her brother and her allies against her.
His fury fading, Lenardo was sorry for his angry tirade. That was no way to handle Aradia. It would only make her more stubborn. If he went back and apologized…
He paced the hallway, trying to determine what to do.
Finally he decided to Read Aradia, just a superficial Reading with no intrusion.
She was lying on his bed, tears streaking her face, a sodden kerchief in her hand. But she was not crying now, and she was completely blocked to Reading.
He knocked at the door and then entered when she neither replied nor Read him.
"Have you thought up more accusations?" she asked, but the words lacked sharpness.
"No," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed, "I've thought up an apology. I know you don't intend mindless conquest, or war. I should not have shouted at you. Will you forgive me?"
"Will you listen to me without jumping to conclusions?" she countered warily.
"Yes."
"Then I forgive you. And you must forgive me, Lenardo."
"For what? For being yourself? I don't suppose you'll ever lose the desire for power. But as long as you care about your people, you will not allow the desire for power to rule you. I should have remembered that, Aradia. With all your power, you would never deliberately hurt anyone."
"Oh, Lenardo!"
She sat up and threw her arms about him, open to Reading-and just as had happened the first time, a whole flood of regretted incidents tumbled into her consciousness. This time, though, there were things he understood, and foremost was the hope she had fostered the past few days that she was carrying his child.
She wanted it very much, he saw, even though she feared what pregnancy might do to her powers. He let his own delight flow to her even as he Read that her flux had begun today, spoiling her hopes.
Before he could attempt to reassure her that they would try again, his pleasure was destroyed by a further flood of guilty memories: she had set out to seduce him as much as he had her! When he had made Julia his daughter, Aradia had feared that the girl would become his heir. But she was certain that he would prefer a child of his own flesh over Julia: Aradia's child, raised and trained in her ways. And the child might inherit both their powers. Educated by Aradia, he would have the unquestionable right, by law of nature, to unite the world under his rule.
For one moment, Lenardo found incredibly funny-and therefore forgivable-the idea that each had set out to seduce the other for ulterior motives. He knew that he had not realized he loved Aradia until after that fateful afternoon, so how could he blame her for reacting the same way? As long as she loved him now, wanted his child out of love, for he could Read Aradia's sincere wish that she had conceived the second time they made love, and not in that first betrayalBetrayal? He pursued the idea.
Aradia had thought him impervious to seduction. So, intending to invite him to her pavilion, she had procured the spicy wine and a drugLenardo thrust her away in horror. "You drugged me?"
"You can break a command implanted in your mind. It was the only way I could be certain-"
"By the gods! Ever since, I have hated myself for what I did that day. But it was not my lust at all, it was your manipulation. I trusted you. It never occurred to me to Read the wine."
Reading his revulsion, she bristled. "You were manipulating me, weren't you?"
"Not by destroying your will."
"Only my powers," she said grimly.
He saw himself through her eyes and cringed. "Yes, I meant to blunt your powers. Manipulation. Deceit. I've learned your savage ways, Aradia, but I will not live by them. I cannot stand what I have become, and I will not have my daughter grow up to be like you. I'm going home."
"Lenardo, this is your home. You may throw me out-"
"No, Aradia, this is your home. You and Wulfston and Lilith can fight out among yourselves how you divide the lands that were mine. I'm taking Julia to Tiberium."
"You can't. They'll kill you."
"Perhaps. But Julia will be placed in an Academy, where she will learn a Reader's disciplines. I don't know if her savage heritage can be controlled, but we must try."
He didn't know whether Aradia was trying to Read him; he had closed his mind to her. But she was clever enough to guess.
"You think Julia will get you through the gates, despite the brand on your arm. Delivering a young Reader from the savages is a fine heroic act."
"Aradia, I am expected to return. You know that. I told you I was sent to stop Galen. The brand is just a ruse."
"One that almost killed you," she said. "That's how much your empire cares about Master Readers. But go back. Tell them of your land left rulerless, theirs for the taking. Maybe it will buy you a few more weeks of life. But it will buy death for hundreds of your people when the empire attacks."
"No, Aradia, you will not use me again. I will neither endanger the people who have come to trust me nor send empire troops into the trap you and your allies would prepare for them. I am through with both deceit and power struggles. If you want to stop me, you will have to kill me… and even if you destroy my body, you will have a difficult time gaining the loyalty of my people if I mysteriously disappear."
Just then Julia burst in, tugging Wulfston by the hand. "Father, what's wrong?"
"We are leaving, Julia. Go and pack. Take anything truly precious to you, for we will not return."
"But-"
"Go! I will explain on the road."
Wulfston looked from Lenardo to Aradia, his dark skin graying as he recognized the finality of their confrontation. "What has happened here? Julia said you were fighting."
"It's over, Wulfston," said Lenardo. "I got a good look at myself as a savage lord. I cannot live this way."
"Then change it."
Because the young black Adept was completely sincere, Lenardo said, "Perhaps you will change it, Wulfston, or perhaps as you come into the full strength of your powers, you will succumb to the same temptations Aradia has- and I have. Undisciplined power is too dangerous. It may be too late for me, but I can try to see that Julia is not corrupted."
"Where will you go?"