Drums of War

'Daniel,' called a voice softly. 'Are you there?'

It was Amalia, wrapped up in a cloak. When she reached the coach, she smiled in through the window. He opened the door and helped her in.

'What are you doing here at this time of night?' he said.

'I wanted to speak to you.'

'There are more convenient moments to do that, Amalia.'

'We're never really alone during the day.'

'Sit down,' he invited, moving over so that she could perch beside him. 'Beatrix will raise the whole inn when she realises that you're not there in the bed.'

'She's a heavy sleeper,' said Amalia. 'You'd have to fire a pistol to wake her up once she dozes off.'

'What did you want to say to me?'

'I owe you an apology, Daniel.'

'That's not true at all.'

'It is,' she insisted. 'After all you'd done for us, I didn't trust you. When you told that man where we'd hidden our valuables, I thought you were only trying to save your own skin. Instead, you merely wanted to distract him.' She gave a shrug. 'I'm ashamed that I thought so badly of you at the time.'

'Not at all,' he said, stroking her arm. 'Your father and the others must have felt exactly the same. Kees had managed to undo the rope around my wrists. I needed Gustave's attention elsewhere so that I could untie my feet. You know the rest.'

'That's the other apology I must make.'

'What is?'

'I was shocked at what you did to that man. There was a moment when I actually felt sorry for him even though he was so repulsive. I'd never seen anything like that before.'

'I hope you never have to do so again, Amalia.'

'It's been in my mind ever since,' she said. 'I was lying in bed thinking about it. Looking back, it was so unjust of me. It was almost as if I was blaming you for what happened whereas you had to do what you did. That man deserved it. We both know what he had in mind for me and Beatrix. The horror was unimaginable.'

'No apology is necessary,' he told her.

'I believe that it is. I thought ill of you.'

'To save lives, you often have to take one, Amalia. It's a rule of military life. I wasn't going to let that oaf molest you. He'll get no sympathy from me.'

'Nor from me,' she said.

'Are the others still sickened by what I did?'

'Beatrix will never get over it. She talked of nothing else until she fell asleep. She began to wonder what you did to that man who was watching our house in Paris.'

'It's just as well she wasn't there at the time.'

'Father was upset,' Amalia went on, 'but more for my sake than his own. He was hurt that I should've been forced to watch but I'm not as delicate as he seems to think. What happened to us in Paris has made me a lot stronger.'

'Adversity can often bring out the best in people.'

'As for Kees, I fancy that he was as revolted as the rest of us.'

'I hope they'll all forgive me in time.'

'They admire you, Daniel, but you did upset them.'

'Everyone likes pork on their plate but nobody wants to see the pig being killed.' She recoiled in surprise. 'I'm sorry,' he said, 'that was a rather vulgar way of putting it.'

'Nevertheless, it was probably accurate.'

'You must go back to bed, Amalia.'

'Are we still friends?' she asked, quietly.

'We're very good friends,' he told her. 'Nothing will change that. Do you feel any better for speaking to me?'

'Yes, I do.'

'Then go back to your room. I'll walk you to the door.'

'There's no hurry, is there?'

'We both need our sleep.'

'I'm enjoying it here, Daniel.'

'You should be resting in a proper bed.'

'Can I stay just a little longer?'

'It's late, Amalia.'

'I'll go in a few minutes,' she said, snuggling up against him. 'You won't send me away, will you?'

He put an arm around her. 'It would never cross my mind.'

'Thank you, Daniel.'

They fell asleep together.

It was a revelation. The woman was young, shapely, compliant and experienced. She made Hillier feel wanted and unthreatened. Her skin was smooth, her hair silken and her lips sweeter than anything he'd ever tasted before. His only regret was that it was over so quickly. What pleased him most was that it was very different from the way his friends had described it. Instead of the wild rutting they'd all talked about, Hillier had enjoyed a gentle encounter, full of soft caresses and tenderness. During the short time it had taken, he'd been madly in love with the woman, wanting to make her his own. It was only when he left the room and Dobbs went straight into it that he realised he was merely sharing her with others.

The walk back to camp gave them a chance for comparison. Hillier's friends were loud-mouthed and boastful. He didn't join in the banter. They seemed to be talking about something that had never happened to him. Dobbs tried to prompt him.

'Did you enjoy it?' he asked.

'Yes, Hugh.'

'Do you feel any different now?'

'I do,' admitted Hillier.

'We picked the right girl. Have you ever felt such a body? 1 rode her for ages. Why didn't you stay longer?'

'I had what I wanted.'

Dobbs giggled. 'Did she take you in her mouth?'

'I had what I wanted,' repeated Hillier, refusing to be drawn.

While the others went into details of their respective couplings, Hillier held his peace. He was still uncertain whether to feel ashamed or exhilarated. Visiting a brothel was something he'd looked on as anathema before. In losing his virginity, he'd also sacrificed his respectability. But he was a drummer now, able to grab the passing pleasures of a soldier's life. The pleasure in this case had been indescribable. He could still feel the blood bubbling in his veins and taste her luscious kisses. A sense of remorse intruded. He wondered what his parents would think of him if they knew what he'd done. It would be seen as sordid, immoral and unbecoming. They would be badly wounded. His pleasure was tempered by repentance.

Another question suddenly loomed and it had a frightening immediacy. What would his uncle, Henry Welbeck, say?

'Shall we go again tomorrow night?' Dobbs asked him.

'I don't know, Hugh.'

'But she liked you, Tom. She told me.'

'I haven't any money,' said Hillier.

'Borrow some. That's what I'll do.'

'I'll see how I feel in the morning.'

'How do you feel now, that's the main thing? Are you glad that you came with us? Didn't I say it'd be the making of you?'

'It was good,' said Hillier, warmed by the memory. 'Thank you for taking me. It was very good.'

They ambled along in the darkness until they saw the campfires ahead. Dobbs hushed them all into silence and took over the lead, trying to find the route by which they'd left earlier. They went in single file with Hillier at the rear. Reaching the stream, Dobbs went along the bank in search of a place to cross. The youth directly behind Dobbs suddenly tripped, bumped into him and burst out laughing.

'Be quiet!' hissed Dobbs.

'I'm sorry, Hugh.'

The damage had already been done. Hearing the noise, two of the sentries came to see what had caused it. In response to their challenge, Dobbs took to his heels.

'Run!' he called.

The other three raced after him, running along the bank until they reached a point where it dipped down low. Following their leader, they plunged into the water and splashed their way across. Hillier kept up with them until he'd almost gained the other bank. His foot then caught in some weeds and he fell headlong into the stream. By the time he'd disentangled his foot and got back up again, it was too late. The sentries were waiting for him. He found himself looking at the barrels of their muskets.