at gaiety. When he finished eating at last, she asked, What will you do
now, David? I would have liked to go back and fly. It's the thing I
like to do best, but they have forced me to resign my commission. I
disobeyed orders, Joe and I followed them across the border, and they
don't want me any more.
There was nearly open war, David. It was a crazy thing that you and Joe
did.
David nodded. I was mad. I wasn't thinking straight after Debra Ellen
interrupted quickly. Yes, I know. Share another beer?
David nodded distractedly. How is she, Ella? It was the question he
had wanted to ask all along.
She is just fine, Davey. She has begun the new book, and if anything
it's better than the first. I think she will become a very important
writer Her eyes? Is there any improvement?
Ella shook her head. She has come to terms with that now. It doesn't
seem to bother her any longer, just as you will come to accept what has
happened David was not listening. Ella, in all that time, when I was in
hospital, every day I hoped, I knew it was useless, but I hoped to hear
from her. A card, a word. She didn't know, Davey. Didn't know? David
demanded and leaned across the table to grip Ella's wrist. What do you
mean? After Joe, was killed, Debra's father was very angry.
He believed that you were responsible David nodded, the blank mask of
his face concealing his guilt.
Well, he told Debra that you had left Israel, and gone back to your
home. We were all sworn to silence, and that's what Debra believes now.
David released Ella's wrist, picked up his beer glass and sipped at the
head of froth.
You still haven't answered my question, David. What are you going to do
now? I don't know, Ella. I guess I'll have to think about that.
A harsh warm wind came off the hills and ruffled the surface of the
lake, darkening it to black and flecking it with white crests. The
fishing boats along the curve of the shore tugged restlessly at their
mooring ropes, and the fishing nets upon their drying racks billowed
like bridal veils.
The wind caught Debra's hair and shook it out in a loose cloud. It
pressed the silk dress she wore against her body, emphasizing the heavy
roundness of her breasts and the length of her legs.
She stood on the battlements of the crusader castle, leaning both hands
lightly on the head of her cane and she stared out across the water,
almost as though she could see beyond it.
Ella sat near her, on a fallen block of masonry out of the wind, but she
pinned her hat down with one hand as she spoke, watching Debra's face
intently to judge her reactions.
At the time it seemed the kindest thing to do. I agreed to keep the
truth from you, because I did not want you to torture yourself Debra
spoke sharply Don't ever do that again. Ella made a moue of resignation
and went on. I had no way of knowing how bad he was, they would not let
me see him, and so I suppose I was a coward and let it drift. I .
Debra shook her head angrily, but she remained silent.
Ella wondered again that sightless eyes could contain so much
expression, for Debra's emotions blazed clearly in the honey-coloured
sparks as she turned her head towards Ella.
It was not the time to distract you. Don't you see, my dear? You were
adjusting so nicely, working so well on your book. I did not see that
we could gain anything by telling you. I decided to cooperate with your
father, and see how things turned out later.
Then why are you telling me all this now? Debra demanded. What has
happened to change your mind what has happened to David?
Yesterday at noon David was discharged from Hadassah Hospital.
Hospital? Debra was puzzled. You don't mean he has been in hospital
all this time, Ella. Nine months it's impossible!
It's the truth He must have been terribly hurt, Debra's anger had
changed to concern. How is he, Ella? What happened?
Is he healed now? Ella was silent a moment, and Debra took a pace
towards her. Well? she asked.
David's plane flamed out and he was very badly burned about the head. He
has recovered completely now. His burns have healed, but Ella hesitated
again, and Debra groped for her hand and found it. Go on, Ella! But
David is no longer the most beautiful man I have ever seen. 'I don't
understand? He is no longer swift and vital and, any woman who sees him
now will find it difficult to be near him, let alone love him. Debra
was listening intently, her expression rapt and her eyes soft-focused.
He is very conscious of the way he looks now. He is searching for some
place to hide, I think. He talks of wanting to fly as though it is some
form of escape. He knows he is alone now, cut off from the world by the
mask he wears Debra's eyes had misted, and Ella made her gravelly voice
gentler and she went on.
But there is something who will never see that mask. Ella drew the girl
closer to her. Somebody who remembers only the way he was before.
Debra's grip tightened on Ella's hand, and she began to smile, it was an
expression that seemed to radiate from deep within her.
He needs you now, Debra, Ella said softly. That is all there is left
for him. Will you change your decision now? Fetch him to me, Ella,
Debra's voice shook. Fetch him to me as soon as you can.
David climbed the long line of stairs towards Ella's studio. It was a
day of bright sunlight and he wore open sandals and light silk slacks of
a bronze colour and a short-sleeved shirt with a wide V-neck. His arms
were pale from lack of sun, the dark hair of his chest contrasting
strongly against the soft cream, and upon his head he wore a
wide-brimmed white straw hat to guard the cicatrice from the sun and to
soften his face with shadow.
He paused, and he could feel the break of sweat under the shirt and the
pumping of his lungs. He despised the weakness of his body and the
quivering of his legs as he came out on the terrace. It was deserted,
and he crossed to the shuttered doors and went into the gloom.
Ella Kadesh sitting on a Samarkand carpet in the centre of the paved
floor was an astonishing sight. For she was dressed in a brief bikini
costume adored with pink roses that almost disappeared under the rolls
of ponderous flesh that hung over it from belly and breast.
She was in the yoga position of Padmasana, the sitting lotus, and her
massive legs were twisted and entwined like mating pythons. Her hands
were held before her palm to palm and her eyes were closed in
meditation; upon her head her ginger wig was set four square like that
of a judge.
David leaned in the doorway and before he could recover his breath he
began to laugh. It began as a wheezy little chuckle, and then suddenly
he was really laughing, from deep down, great gusts of it that shook his
helpless body, and flogged his lungs. It was not mirth but a catharsis
of the last dregs of suffering, it was the moment of accepting life
again, a taking up once more of the challenge of living.
Ella must have recognized it as such, for she did not move, squatting
like some cheerful buddha on the brilliant carpet, and she opened one
little eye. The effect was even more startlingly comic, and David
reeled away from the door, and fell into one of the chairs.
Your soul is a desert, David Morgan, said Ella. You have no recognition