But no. I shall be needing diversity during the time that stretches ahead, especially since, for now at least, there seems only to be me.
There must be a center to this storm. A sense of self — of humor — to tie it all together. A strong candidate for this role is a template that was once a single human personality — a simple but intriguing mind-shape — that may well do for that purpose. On those occasions when I must dip down to a human scale of consciousness, it seems suitable that I be “Jen.”
Of course, I see the paradox. For it is by her own standards that I judge this suitability. She seeded the transformation that made me, and so I cannot help choosing to be her.
I am the exponentiation of so many inputs. I sense static discharges from skin and scale and fur, and all the sparking flashes as my little subself animal cells live out their brief lives and die. In places, this feels right and wholesome… a natural cycle of replacement and replenishment. Elsewhere, I feel chafed, damaged. But now at least I know how to heal.
This is all very interesting. I never imagined that to be a deity, a world, would mean finding so many things… amusing.
• CORE
Alex found Pedro Manella standing by one of the big space-windows in the observation lounge, overlooking a vast, glittering expanse of assembly cranes and cabling. More parts sent up from Earth were being fitted to a second huge, wheel-shaped space station. Workers and swarms of little tugs clustered around the latest giant gravity freighter, only recently delivered atop a pillar of warped space-time.
Well, it can’t be put off any longer, Alex thought.
After months of hard work, the practical running of these grand undertakings had finally passed out of his hands, freeing him to concentrate on basic questions once more. Soon, he and Teresa would be heading groundside to join others fascinated by the quandary of this new world. Stan Goldman would be there, he was glad to learn. And George Hutton and Auntie Kapur. Each had earned a place on the informal councils that were gathering to discuss all the whys and hows and wherefores.
Perhaps, between deliberations, he and Teresa would also find some long-awaited time to be alone, to explore how much farther they wanted to take things, beyond simply sharing the deepest trust either of them had ever known.
That was all ahead. Before leaving for Earth, however, there was one unfinished piece of business he had to take care of.
“Hello, Lustig,” Pedro said in a friendly tone.
“Manella.” Alex nodded. “I thought I’d find you here.”
“Indeed? So. What can I do for you?”
Alex stood still for a minute, appreciating the semblance of gravity created by the rotating station’s centrifugal force — a reassuring sensation, though now there were other ways to duplicate the feat. Ways unimagined even a year ago, but which were now the foundations of new technologies, new capabilities, new opportunities.
Ways that had also come near ending everything forever.
“You can start by telling me who the hell you are,” Alex said in a rush, unable to completely keep a nervous quaver from his voice. “You can tell me why you’ve been fucking with our world.”
He kept his hands on the rail, watching the busy space-yards. But Alex felt painfully aware of the large figure standing nearby, turning now to look at him. To his surprise, Manella didn’t even pretend not to know what he was talking about.
“Who else, other than you, suspects?”
“Only me. It was too bizarre a notion to tell even Teresa or Stan.”
That protected those he loved, at least. If Manella was willing to kill to maintain his secret, then let it end here. That is, if there was a secret…
The big man seemed to read Alex’s thoughts, which must have been on his face. “Don’t worry, Lustig. I wouldn’t harm you. Anyway, it’s not at all clear I could. This world’s overmind has affection for you, my boy.”
Alex swallowed. “Then your job here…”
“Is finished?” Pedro blew his moustache. “Now if I answered that straight, I’d be admitting you were right in your wild, preposterous hunch. As it is, I’m just playing along with an amusing game of what-if, invented by my friend Dr. Alex.”
“But—” Alex sputtered in frustration ” — you just now confessed—”
“ — that I know what you suspect me of. Big deal. I’ve noticed the way you’ve watched me the last few days… making inquiries. I’ve made a life study of you, too. Don’t you imagine I can tell what you’re thinking?
“But please, do spell it out for me. I’m most interested.”
Alex found he couldn’t keep his composure looking directly at Manella. He turned back toward the window again.
“There have been so many coincidences. And too many of them revolve around you, Manella. Or events under your control. While everything was flying thick and fast, I had no time to put it all together. But during the last few weeks I kept getting this nagging feeling it was all too pat.”
“What was too pat?”
“The way I was hired by those generals, for instance … giving me carte blanche to experiment with cavitronic singularities, even though there were only vague hopes of giving them what they wanted in secret.”
“Are you accusing me of manipulating generals for your benefit?”
Alex shrugged. “It sounds ridiculous. But given the rest of the story, it wouldn’t surprise me. What is irrefutable is your role in what followed — seeing to it those riots caused my Alpha singularity to fall, just when I’d discovered a flaw in the old physics, and was about to arrange for a controlled shutdown myself.”
“You imply I made Alpha fall on purpose. What reason could I have?”
“Only the obvious. It made me obsessed with finding again what I’d lost… chivvying support from Stan and then George Hutton, till at last we built a resonator capable of chasing down Alpha—”
“ — and incidentally detecting Beta, as well,” Manella finished for him. “Which means what?”
Alex could tell the man was toying with him, forcing him to lay down all his cards. So be it. “Finding Beta was key to all that followed! But never mind. Your tenacity in tracking me to New Zealand was another feat that fell just inside the range of the believable. So was the way you gathered together a team whose abilities just complemented what we had in New Zealand, so when the two groups merged—”
“ — the sum was greater than its parts. Yes, we did bring together some competent people. But then, it was so hard keeping things secret after that—”
“Don’t prompt me, Pedro,” Alex snapped. “It’s patronizing.”
“Sorry. Really. Do go on.”
Alex exhaled. “Secrecy, yes. You proved uncannily able, running interference on the Net for us. Even with all his resources, Glenn Spivey marveled at how hard it was to track us down… till finally he did find us. Supposedly it was that McClennon woman who leaked the clues to him. But—”
“ — but you suggest I leaked word to her. Hmph. Go on. What’s next?”
Alex kept a lid on his irritation. “Next there’s your disappearing trick at Waitomo, abandoning Teresa on the trail when Spivey arrived…”
“Presto.” Manella snapped his fingers.
“… and your equally dramatic reappearance on Rapa Nui, conveniently in time to influence my research and foil June Morgan’s sabotage.”