“I would have wanted to ask you but you would have said no.”
I looked over at Avian and really looked at him. He was tall, at least six feet. He wasn’t built as big as Bill was, but he wasn’t small. He had the lean frame of a man who worked hard and had lived on a rations diet for the last six years. His dark short hair accented the tanned color of his skin, his surprisingly blue eyes piercing. “I highly doubt that.”
He smiled at me and squeezed my hand.
“Problem would have been that while you would still be in high school, I would have still been in the Army, hopefully going through real medical school. People wouldn’t have liked the age difference. You would have barely even been legal.”
I gave a little chuckle.
I considered what I might have been like if I hadn’t grown up the way I did. I was as mature as any of the other women in Eden. They didn’t look down on me and I didn’t consider any of the others superior to myself. But maybe if I hadn’t been experimented on and grown up in a world of running and raids I wouldn’t have been that way. Maybe all I would have cared about would have been jewelry and what boy was asking me to the prom or what dress I was going to wear.
The world we lived in made me grow up. I didn’t know what it was like to be a real teenager.
We walked at a swift pace for another two hours before signs of life were detected. I glanced at Avian who gave me a weak smile, the smile of knowing the tiring endless work that was before the both of us. I returned his smile, let go of his hand, and went to help reassemble Eden.
TEN
With as little as we possessed these days it didn’t take long to put everything back together. Everyone helped everyone, no one was left in distress about what needed to be done. We were a family, a unit that worked as one.
Things were different though. With Sarah’s newfound medical condition, she had moved into Avian’s tent permanently. The seizures were infrequent but happened enough that Avian insisted. I was on my own now.
Avian and Gabriel’s tents were always placed close together since, in a way, they were the leaders of Eden. I would have set up my tent next to theirs, but when I realized West had set up not far from their tents, I assembled mine on the farthest edge of the clearing. Forgiveness wasn’t one of my stronger traits.
Our new location was as beautiful as Morgan had said. The lake was crystal clear, the sunlight dazzling as it danced upon its surface. A clearing to the side of it provided the perfect place to set up camp. It was also a perfect defense location. Should any of the Hunters find us here, we could all head into the water where they couldn’t follow. As long as they didn’t start shooting.
It was, however, much further from the gardens. As I walked to the gardens for my shift the first morning, I figured it took me at least forty-five minutes. But by a week later we were all used to it and made the trek without complaint. The fact that the garden was starting to yield early crops helped that.
The sun shone down on us as we worked on the rows of vegetables, the temperature rising slowly. It was always hard, having to move locations but it was difficult to complain considering how the weather was warming and the perfectness of the new location.
Graye worked silently two rows behind me. We had talked little since I realized what he had done for Avian. In a strange way, I felt like I should apologize to him but at the same time, it wasn’t me that had asked him to grab the necklace.
Terrif directed people soundlessly as to the areas they should work on. I could tell he was getting flustered with Wix who had pulled up a section of carrots, thinking they were weeds. It was hard to stay mad at him though when he started eating the green stems as a way of apology.
West worked in the opposite corner, never looking up as he weeded in the potato patch. We had kept up a careful pattern of avoidance ever since I had discovered the notebook, barely uttering more than five words to each other.
I pulled a massive weed out of the patch of peas I was working on, and tossed it into a wheelbarrow. My eyes scanned the tree line for the fiftieth time since we had arrived. Even though all the scouting parties had found no signs of the Hunters, I felt uneasy. They had to still be out there somewhere. Hunters were persistent.
The afternoon shift arrived and I bolted out of the garden as soon as I handed my gloves off. I wasn’t ready to have to talk to West yet, I wasn’t sure what I should say or how I would even react. Apparently he wasn’t ready to talk to me either. That was just fine with me.
Upon arriving back at camp, I looked for Sarah. I’d had little chance to talk to her ever since she had gotten sick. I didn’t want her to feel like I was avoiding her.
Just as I was about step inside their tent, Avian came out, our bodies bumping into each other unexpectedly. His vivid blue eyes looked down at me, a small smile coming to his lips as he grabbed my shoulders to steady the both of us. A hint of a smile crept into the corner of my lips as well.
“Sorry,” I said. “I just came to see Sarah.”
“She’s inside resting,” he said as he withdrew his hands after a long hesitation. “She had another seizure a few minutes ago.”
“Is she going to be alright?” I asked, concern flooding through me.
“I think so,” he said as he smiled at me again, warmth spreading through his eyes.
“I’m not deaf, you know,” Sarah called from inside the tent. “And I’m still here.”
Avian chuckled, placing a hand on my arm again. “I’ve got to go. Victoria is having troubles with her foot again.”
“Bye,” I said as he walked away. As he did, I caught a glimpse of West before he ducked into his tent, causing my heart to jump into my throat for a moment. I wondered why my chest gave a strange squeeze.
The tent was dark as I entered, the air stuffy and warm.
“Tie it back, would you?” Sarah said through the darkness as I entered. “I think he’s trying to suffocate me. I feel like I’m living in a cave these days.”
I tied the flap of the tent back as she asked, light flooding the cramped space. Turning, I made my way to Avian’s bed and sat.
Sarah’s hair was tousled, her dark curls sticking out in every direction. Her eyes were reddened and tired looking.
“How are you feeling?” I asked, hoping she didn’t notice the way I scrutinized every inch of her.
“I’d be better if everyone would stop asking me that question,” she said with a tired tone.
“Everyone is concerned.”
“I know,” she sighed as she lay on her back. “I’m just tired of being the sick one. I’m as fine as I can be I guess. I’m handling it. Avian thinks this is something I’ll probably deal with the rest of my life.”
“There’s nothing he can do?” I asked, feeling suddenly sick.
“If he had access to an MRI machine, a pharmacy full of drugs, and a neurologist, maybe. But we just have to be careful now.”
“We can get drugs,” I said as I felt hope surge within. “I can go on another raid. I got the shots Avian needed before. If he tells me what you need I can get it.”
Sarah shook her head, a smile creeping onto her face. “He would never ask you to do that, to go into danger like that again.”
“He wouldn’t need to ask me. He didn’t need to ask me before,” I said as my brow furrowed, my blood boiling just a little.
“He wouldn’t tell you what to look for to prevent you from trying. You’re too important to him. It would destroy him if you were lost.”
An awkward silence hung in the after she stopped. Things were changing between Avian and I. I was confused. No one had ever behaved this way towards me before and I didn’t understand what I was even feeling.