What was wrong with me? I was Eve. I didn’t need to feel things like this. I wasn’t supposed to feel things like this! Everything was supposed to be blocked out. I was just making my life more complicated.
I reached the eastern shore of the lake and turned back.
I was nearly back to where my clothes hung to dry when I felt something splash against me, waves not created by my strokes. I pulled up short, my head popping out of the water at the same time Avian’s did.
“Avian!” I gasped as my hands automatically clamped around my chest. “What are you doing here?!”
“Swimming!” he said in a shocked tone. “What are you doing here?”
“Swimming!” I answered back, turning my back to him. The water was dark in this section of the lake because of the shadowing of the trees, for which I was immensely grateful. We were still nearly ten yards away from shore though. I then noticed Avian’s clothes hanging about twenty feet away from mine, dripping wet, just like mine were.
“Well turn around,” I commanded as I started swimming for the shore again. Avian did as I asked.
I wasn’t sure what to say as I debated what to pull on. Everything was still soaking. My cheeks flushing, I pulled on only my underthings. It was uncomfortable wearing wet clothes with the temperatures so warm. I turned my back as Avian came to shore and pulled on his pants.
We stood there, both unsure of what to say, not quite looking at each other. I sensed a lot of tension coming from Avian, hating the way it made me feel inside.
“I don’t want things to be like this between us,” I finally said, looking up into his face. “You mean more to me than anyone here in Eden. I can’t stand this.”
“More than West?” he asked, his voice tight with a hint of hurt in it.
I took a few steps toward him, stopping just a foot away from him. “More than West,” I said quietly. “You are home to me Avian. You are all I’ve ever had.”
Avian finally looked up into my eyes, his blue ones filled with feelings I was starting to understand. “You mean everything to me Eve. I know I haven’t exactly come right out and said it yet, but you do. But if you have feelings for West, I…” he trailed off as his eyes again fell to the rough sand underneath our feet.
I bit my lower lip, my own eyes falling from his face. “Something is happening to me, Avian. There is something inside of me that is waking up and I don’t know how to handle it. I’m feeling things I’ve never felt before. Things I don’t understand. I’m terrified, Avian.”
His eyes met mine again, soft and sad looking at the same time. I wanted him to do something, to say something. Avian always had the answers for me, always sorted things out when I couldn’t understand. “You can’t have both, Eve. It just doesn’t work that way.”
I stared into his eyes, feeling my insides raging. I felt like I was going to get swallowed up by myself again. Something inside of me reached out to Avian, wanting to pull him closer and never have to let go.
He reached up, taking the stone wings he had carved into his hand, his eyes studying its surface. “No matter what you choose, I’ll still be here. Just don’t expect me to not get hurt.”
My lips were against his before I even allowed myself to consider what I was doing. My arms wrapped behind his neck at the same time that his wrapped around my waist. My insides surged in ways I didn’t understand, and a feeling of what I could describe as nothing other than belonging settled into every corner of my being. Everything about his scent, his body, his presence brought on a flood of memories, sizzling with a feeling of newness and anticipation.
And almost as soon as it started, Avian pulled away, resting his forehead against mine, one of his hands pressing softly against my bare stomach. He closed his eyes, his lips pursed together. “You can’t have both,” he said quietly. He pressed one more quick kiss to my forehead, then grabbed his clothes and walked back in the direction of Eden.
FOURTEEN
The floorboards creaked in protest as my booted feet walked across them. Dust swirled around my legs, the light catching their form, tracing patterns in the air. The air was stale with the heavy scent of abandonment.
While on scouting duty that morning, I had found the cabin in the trees. It was a log style structure, fairly large for its remote location. A roughhewn road led up to it, the forest pressing back in, trying to take the land back. I had watched silently from the trees for a full ten minutes before I dared move closer. Silently, I had peered into the windows, searching for any signs of life, enemy or friend. There were none.
I felt like I was stepping into another world. The world of houses, of flooring, running water and windows was from another age. The age of humanity, of mankind. We were in the age of the Fallen now.
The front area was full of furniture, well-worn but taken care of. Pictures lined the walls, smiling faces staring back at me. Books were stacked on random surfaces, a yellowing newspaper lay casually on the kitchen table. I grabbed a handful of the books and stuffed them into my bag for Gabriel and Wix. A bedroom led off of the front room. It was a small room with little more than the bed in it, but it was still larger than my tent. I was tempted to lie down on the bed, just to see how soft it was, but my nerves were too on edge.
A small bathroom was attached to the bedroom. I lifted the handle of the faucet in the sink and a small smile crept onto my face as brown water sputtered out. It was true. Running water really was real. I left it on as I turned to explore the rest of the house.
The kitchen was small, but it may have served the king of the land for all I knew. It was glorious looking. I knew what the women who worked in our kitchen would give to have use of this. I opened a lower cupboard and pulled out bottles, not even knowing what they were for, but figuring they would appreciate anything I could bring back.
I was looking out the cracked window of the back door when I felt the boards under my feet wiggle. I looked down and noticed the cutout shape of a small door. It creaked loudly as I pulled it open. The overpowering smell of spoiled food assaulted my senses. I pulled my shirt over my nose and dropped into the dark space below.
It took a moment for my eyes to adjust to the darkness. The air was damp, feeling like earth and humidity. As my eyes finally adjusted, I wasn’t sure what to think of the sight before me.
The area that had been dug out had to be nearly as big as the rest of the cabin. Rows and rows of shelves crowded the area. Canned goods were stacked everywhere, buckets of flour and sugar covered all of the bottom racks. Two entire shelves were filled with glass bottles of water. The source of the smell was coming from a few sacks of rotting potatoes in one corner.
Whoever had lived here was preparing for something. It didn’t look like they had even gotten to use it before whatever had happened to them happened. I wondered what their fate had been. Had they been found by Hunters? Had they gone to the city for supplies, only to be infected there?
Pushing away the ghosts of the past, I climbed back up the ladder and closed the hatch behind me. I wandered back into the bathroom to where the water was still running. It was clear now and flowing steady. There was a glass stall in the bathroom as well. I thought this must have been a shower. It seemed to fit Sarah’s description. I turned the knobs in it and a minute or so later, it too was cascading clear water.
Checking again to make sure the house was still clear and that I didn’t see anything outside, I stripped down and climbed inside. The water was cold but not as cold as it was at the lake. I found a few bottles of liquid and sniffed at their contents. They smelled so good, I massaged it into every surface of my body. I couldn’t stop smelling my skin.